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Down, down, Down......

(33 Posts)
SallyB392 Tue 07-Apr-20 08:31:39

I'm very low, really low, and wish my world would quietly come to an end. Then I feel so so guilty for feeling that way.

I know that I should contact my CPN, but i can't face that, I should tell my husband, but don't want to worry him. I won't actively 'do' anything, but, and I'm ashamed to admit this, I wish I could become infected by coronavirus, and be one of those that doesn't make it.

avitorl Tue 07-Apr-20 16:00:40

today I found a Journal /Diary that I had written daily accounts in when I was recovering from a very difficult time in my life and remember how much it helped in my recovery.
Each day I made a note of 3 things to be thankful for that day.It could be really small things like sunshine.
I also made a list of any achievements I'd had in the day eg getting out of bed,and praising myself for doing so.
At the end of each day I made a list of things to do the following day and ticked them off as I did them.
Sometimes I didn't achieve those things but it was very important give self praise when I did and avoid self blame when I didn't.
Reading back through that Journal brought so many things back to me and made me remember what a help it had been
.It might help to try something like this for yourself?
I've decided to start writing again to help get myself through
these difficult times .

SalsaQueen Tue 07-Apr-20 16:05:30

You are ill. You are suffering from depression, which is a very real and debilitating illness. It is not your fault. You can get better, but will probably need antidepressants.

Please speak to your doctor. You need to sort it out.

I speak from personal experience, having been on antidepressants for many years - and I promise you, with the correct treatment, you can and will feel better in a relatively short time. x

AGAA4 Tue 07-Apr-20 16:16:01

Sally. Good advice so far. Big hugs and flowers

rosenoir Tue 07-Apr-20 16:26:59

Keep telling yourself that this feeling will pass,because as you know it will.

Hard to get motivated I know but do something that occupies your mind, even just watching tv or a crossword.

Break the day up so you just think an hour ahead just plan to fill the hour or 15 mins if an hour is too much.

flowers

Nortsat Wed 08-Apr-20 15:41:30

Sally ?

avitorl Fri 10-Apr-20 01:46:21

wondering how you are coping now,Sally? You are in my thoughts and I hope you are feeling better than you were?

Txquiltz Fri 10-Apr-20 01:57:38

Thank you so much for putting trust in us. Depression is very often associated with body chemicals and under stress (like isolating) the chemical issues worsen. They are very treatable and you might find yourself feeling better very soon. Talk to your CPN immediately. Your husband may be able to help too. I have been through this years ago. Churchill called it his Black Dog". Be willing to let those around you help. We are here if you just need a listening ear.