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l hate the night l am so afraid l just eat and make myself so ill

(66 Posts)
jillgood Wed 22-Jul-20 02:00:01

As soon as it goes slightly darker l become very afraid, l have alot of health problems with my bowels but l seem to eat to comfort myself knowing it will make my bowels worse.
l feel so poorly right now as though l have pulled all my stomach muscles l cannot walk properly because my back and sides hurt through passing wind. l feel l may have done something by eating when l am so stressed and afraid as anyone got any advice l do not know where to turn.

Summerlove Wed 22-Jul-20 02:26:37

No advice
But I’ll keep you in my thoughts x

boat Wed 22-Jul-20 03:39:44

I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time.

What is it about the dark that makes you fearful?

I think you need to talk to your GP.

Meanwhile all I can suggest is cup soup.. It feels like you are eating but may have a gentler effect on your digestive system.

Curlywhirly Wed 22-Jul-20 07:19:31

Stress is notorious for affecting your digestive system; it sounds like you are suffering from IBS, which can be brought on by stress. You definitely need to visit your GP as you are suffering both mentally and physically. In the meantime, try to eat your main meal earlier on in the day and avoid eating large meals when you are really stressed. You could also look at some relaxation videos online or download Headspace, a really good app for relaxation.

sodapop Wed 22-Jul-20 07:21:12

You need to talk to your GP about your anxiety jillgood this must be making your bowel condition worse. Try to relax, have you any family or friends who could support you through this. I hope you feel better soon.

annep1 Wed 22-Jul-20 07:24:05

Are you afraid because you are on your own at night jillgood ?

EllanVannin Wed 22-Jul-20 07:30:57

You can't live like this, make an appointment with your GP asap.
Any irrational fears such as you have need attention with both counselling and the appropriate medication.

harrigran Wed 22-Jul-20 08:25:38

Seek professional help.
The gut is like a second brain and reacts badly to stress.
When my bowels played up I ate only bland food, I found rice noodles less irritating.
Stay well clear of fatty junk food.

Franbern Wed 22-Jul-20 09:33:43

Harrigan, you MUST contact your GP and ask for a double appointment so that you can about both your night time fears and your bowel problems.

There are many reasons for such problems, most can be treated. They do not just go away, and the longer you leave it the worse they can become. Are the night time fears related to this -do you think you may have some dreadful illness?

Do write down quite clearly, all the causes you to have dark fears, and also write down clearly everything about your bowel movements. How bad are they, any particular foods that make them worse, times of the day/night that cause problems. Check them yourself, is there any mucus or blood in them.

Do not be afraid - most bowel problems can be treated, but the sooner the better. You may firstly have a telephone consultation with your GP, but he/she will the arrange for you to come to have physical check, and then can send you - if necessary = for a colonoscopy.

People do panic and get embarrassed when this part of their system seems to go wrong. It is not embarrassing to the Doctor, just another section of the human body.

Even when it is very bad - there is a lot that can be done. Forty years ago, my bowels went wrong,- after ten years of much treatment and medication, and feeling very, very ill most of the time, I gave in to the medics and had a total, unreversable, ileostomy. Marvellous result, became well for the first time in a decade, and have lived my life fully and actively since then - yes with that little bag, No problems though, Did so wish I had gone along with that many years earlier.

Please try to stop worrying, and do something today. Try NOT to eat later in the evening at all, but do drink, - water or water based drinks often. Steer clear of fatty foods, including cheese. Problem with cup a soups is their high salt content, best is just to have something like a green tea or fruit flavoured tea (whichever you prefer), and a very plain biscuit to accompany it.

Most important advice is STOP WORRYING AND GO TO GP

Do let us know h ow you get on.

ladymuck Wed 22-Jul-20 10:00:49

Good advice given here. You can't go on suffering in this way. You need help with stress and your bowels.

Alexa Wed 22-Jul-20 11:13:14

Experienced advice from franbern.
If I may add, oat porridge (no salt) strained though a wire strainer is kind to your digestion.

avitorl Wed 22-Jul-20 11:47:24

Really good advice given already. I would just add that if you are feeling scared and alone phoning the Samaritans might help.
So sorry you are feeling like you are.

annep1 Wed 22-Jul-20 12:11:41

I may be wrong but it sounds like * Jillgood* has an extreme fear of something bad happening at night when it is dark and she is alone. I'm waiting for her to expand. Living with this would impact greatly on physical health.

Luckygirl Wed 22-Jul-20 13:07:45

I used to feel anxious at night when in the house on my own - since OH died and I now have to face days and nights on my own, it has just gone away - I am guessing because I had a lot more things to worry about all of a sudden! And a sense that the worst had already happened, so there was a sense of what the hell!

Do seek some help - this sounds really miserable for you.

Millie22 Wed 22-Jul-20 14:19:24

As others have said you really need to speak to your GP and talk through how you are feeling. We can only give general advice on a forum like this which may help a bit but it's always better to seek help when you need it.

FlyingHandbag Wed 22-Jul-20 15:20:15

I don't know much about the bowels apart from some relatives have been helped by Buscopan. However, I can relate to what you say about night. I also get frightened at night.
I put in earphones and listen to music and try to keep busy so I can't think about possible scenarios. X

annep1 Wed 22-Jul-20 15:33:23

I used to feel really anxious that when I was living alone I had two large bolts on my bedroom door and still didn't sleep. So I understand this fear. I love the summer nights when the sun rises early. It's an awful way to live and affected my health badly. So you do need to speak to your doctor and possibly get some counselling, which I wish I had done. The bowel problem needs investigating but I have no doubt that your physical health will improve when this anxiety is treated.

MayBee70 Wed 22-Jul-20 16:25:01

I do sympathise. I suffered from a sort of borderline eating disorder for most of my adult life. Started with dieting in my teens and just carried on from there. Late at night I would just start eating junk food and couldn’t stop even though it made me feel sick. Realised as I got older that it was cyclical/hormonal and even now I eat more when I’m tired. The OP definitely needs professional help. I find things like relaxation tapes help: Paul McKenna is very good.

welbeck Wed 22-Jul-20 17:17:06

i guess you are eating as a sort of distraction to anxiety feelings.
is there anything else you could do, some easy tidying, maybe while sitting down, going through old papers, or clothes etc. to keep occupied but in a low-key way.
and try to nibble innocuous things like plain crackers, or rice cakes.
i find having the radio on helps. there are multiple stations online available. good luck.

Scissordolly Wed 22-Jul-20 17:41:01

Are you on Omeprazole for acid reflux? It gave me dreadful cramps and constipation.My insides have been so much better since I stopped it after many years.I now take Gaviscon and always have Rennies in my pocket.

Try to make a mental list or write down little things you are going to do next day and think about them at night when you feel afraid.X

Alexa Wed 22-Jul-20 19:22:09

Jillgood might possibly not know she can control what to think about. I do this by concentrating on some thought of my own choice ,a thought that is not a worry or a fear. I could not sleep if my thinking was uncontrolled.

phoenix Wed 22-Jul-20 19:42:05

Jillgood what exactly is it about the light fading/going slightly darker that makes you anxious?

We can't control the sun setting, but there may be ways you can adopt to help you feel better about it.

annep1 Thu 23-Jul-20 23:24:53

Jillgood how are you?

lemongrove Thu 23-Jul-20 23:31:27


Jillgood what exactly is it about the light fading/going slightly darker that makes you anxious?

We can't control the sun setting, but there may be ways you can adopt to help you feel better about it.

OP has vanished!

Phoenix in answer to your question,
‘The things that go bump in the night
Are likely to give one a fright,
It’s the hole in each ear, that lets in the fear,
That, and the absence of light!’

annep1 Fri 24-Jul-20 09:08:35

The absence of light that's it exactly. Darkness is scary for some folk. I can't sleep in a totally dark room. Also I'm afraid of someone breaking in under cover of darkness even though in all the time I've lived no one has ever done so.
It's irrational,
But I would like to hear more from * Jillgood*.