BLACK DOG 8

Saredycat the news yesterday must have raised anxiety throughout the country, hope you will continue with your walks. It’s natural to be concerned for our loved ones my love .

Rafichagran you are coping with much stress, it was good you went shopping , something positive.

I am glad the ‘Christmas tree’, brought some comfort, when we are struggling with anxiety or depression we can feel so alone no matter how many people are around us, so we know
just by looking at the tree we have the reminder that here we
all understand that feeling of being alone even when we are not alone .

These frightening times will pass and we must try to hold onto
this x

good evening all chrisyR i didnt reply to your question..really sorry..The chickens are in a field just to the side of my house...we rent it from the local farmer xx

so my DD and my beautiful sassy pants (GD) have gone into tier 4 ...this means i cannot see them for xmas and I am so cheesed off. I need to see her my mental health is suffering so much. I have no tree and no decorations up as I decided i am not celebrating xmas this year.

nanny a big disappointment for you . Is your Son with you for Christmas ? When you spoke of your plans for Christmas you said ‘we are going Christmas Eve’,

Mental health problems are soaring , so many are having to
accept they won’t see family as planned.

You can FaceTime your daughter and granddaughter, it isn’t the same as being with them but you can see them and talk to
them, I will do the same as others here will do x

Chrissy if I’m feeling depressed I often stop watching the news for a while. How have you been today?
We have been sad today. Because we’ve moved to tier 4, my hospital visit with DH was cancelled. We had both been looking forward to seeing each other. He has also been in a lot of pain today so I would have liked to go and cheer him up.
Hop the pain team will be in tomorrow and help ease the pain.
Nonnie I would find it easier not to wrap presents at all but children love the excitement.
Glad a chat with your DS and a neighbour cheered you.
Annie so glad MT was with you. You must have been so relieved to see her after her recent COVID scare.
Scaredycat as I mentioned. We are in tier 4. My DIL was saying that many of our DGC’s school friends have been off school with the virus.
I think Annie’s idea of looking at the tree and thinking of our gang was such a good one. It always helps to know you are not alone.
rafichagran thanks for asking. It is DH who is in pain, not me. He has 6 broken ribs from a fall.
Sorry you’ve had a bad week and stresses at work too. I hope you have time off over Christmas and can rest and relax a bit.
Nanny sorry you will not be able to see your DD and DGD over Christmas. I can understand you not feeling good about Christmas but a little tree might cheer you. It is sad for all of us being apart from loved ones but try and think of it as a time when many people are having a few days rest. A little peace. If not the tree could you just put some lights up. What about your son, does he not want some decorations? As *Annie said many of us will be doing Face time. We are lucky we have the ability to do so.
Make plans to have a family Christmas when this lockdown is all over. That is what our family is planning even if it turns out to be a BBQ in the summer.
Sleep well all.x

Doodle not being able to visit your husband is so distressing,
hope you are getting enough sleep, sending you a cwtch x

So sorry * Doodle*I know it must be hard not to see him in hospital.
I hope he gets relief from his pain soon.

Evening everyone
Nonnie I’ve never heard of anyone wanting their presents wrapped in newspaper before I’m sorry that you were feeling so down yesterday. It’s bad news everywhere isn’t it. I keep thinking to myself surely things must take a turn for the better soon.
Annie I’m so glad that your MT visited yesterday, that must have been so lovely for you. I hope that it isn’t too long before you see her again.
Scaredycat It was very scary yesterday I know, keep looking at the tree when you’re feeling very anxious, that’s what I’ve been doing.
rafichagran Thank you for your kind words. I’m sorry that you’ve had a difficult week. I agree, if you can find the motivation to go out it does help with the anxiety.
Annie You’re so right, you can be in a room full of people but still feel so lonely.
nanny I’m so sorry that you won’t be seeing your DD and GD over Christmas as they’re in tier 4. Take care of yourself.
Doodle I’m really trying to not watch or listen to the news. I’m so sorry that you’re in Tier 4 and so can’t visit your DH. I hope they can give him something to ease the pain and that he’ll be discharged soon.
Annie I’m so thankful that you suggested that if we’re feeling anxious or depressed we can look at the tree and know that the BDG understand how we’re feeling and we’re not alone. I have spent a lot of time over the weekend looking at our tree. We are so much better off than most, we’re in tier 2 but we’re still going to be very careful. Our DD and DSiL are coming for Christmas dinner, we will extend the dining table and we will be at one end and them at the other. Our other DD, her partner and our DGD are popping round but will come in round the side of the house straight into the conservatory and will only be here for about half an hour. I cried myself to sleep last night thinking about my cat that was put to sleep in March at the age of 18. I keep thinking that maybe we shouldn’t have had her put to sleep. This is the problem with me, if I get down about one thing then other things crop up and before I know it I’m in a very deep hole that I can’t climb out of.
I hope that everyone sleeps well x

Hi all x

Asking how you all are today is as daft as asking is rain wet

Forgive me for speaking of Christmas trees again but I was singing ‘oh Christmas Tree’ this morning , yes daft , but the
second verse ? I thought of our chats about Spring , snowdrops
and summer on the way so - stay brave dear friends x

Your boughs so green in summertime,
Stay bravely green in wintertime.
O tannenbaum, O Christmas Tree
How lovely are thy branches!

Hi Rafichagran, yes, that kind of person is impossible to deal with, I think we simply have to accept the fact and that it is them not us. You did well to switch off like that.

Nanny so sorry to read that you won't see them, I already know I can't see mine until at least March because of their travel restrictions. Wish I could find something positive to tell you.

Annie I hope you are right about video calls, I worry that the ISPs won't cope with the demand. Ours sometimes goes off between about 6-7 and we think that is because of high demand.

I agree the strain on our mental health has increased enormously, even for those not already suffering.

Chrissey it's an environmental thing for him, won't use a tumble drier, has finally succumbed to the dishwasher after I convinced him it is better for the environment, bikes to the train instead of using the car etc.

So hard when that awful what if I had/hadn't comes in and causes doubt. No answer, just sympathy.

When I was in hospital my consultant told me I should stop think 'I should' and I 'ought' and think about what I want. He also suggested I try to stop ruminating. Perhaps some of you can be better at that than me?

So sorry for all of you in tier 4, we are in 3 but, apart from the one day we hope to eat here with DS & Dil, I think we are following the same rules as you just because it makes sense.

Today I am feeling so sorry for the lorry drivers who are stuck in their cabs and not allowed to work. Some of them are only paid by the kilometre so will be losing money as well as being separated from their loved ones.

Woke up feeling very down but then a video call from DS helped and I am now dressed in a skirt, hair done, make up on and even earrings! Can't remember the last time I wore a skirt All this just to do another hospital run but why not?

Morning all x Yes we are all feeling ‘meh’ I’m sure, some more than others. My DH is now like a caged animal, not coping with the restrictions very well, as I said he’s a very sociable and outgoing person, misses holidays, outings etc, I’m the opposite, so not mixing is second nature to me!
A sentence I learnt on here and like very much is: “We are all in the same storm but in different boats”. So true. Hope you’ll all have a peaceful day

Hello all.
Annie- I,ll always walk as long as I am able. We love to be outdoors and even though at the moment we only walk locally there is always something new if you look hard enough!!!
Positive for today- from tomorrow the days will be getting longer.
I,m looking at my tree now too!!!!
Nanny- I wish you had just a tiny tree so you could look at it & remember you are not alone and we are all here. We will not see anyone on Xmas Day but at least we can see each other on Face Time.
Doodle- you too in Tier 4! So sorry it has meant you can’t visit your DH you must miss him very much. I do hope that his pain eases soon.
Chrissy- try to focus on the day you will have with your family I do hope you all have a lovely day. Try not to dwell on your little cat- the kindest thing you can do for a distressed or poorly animal is to let them go. Keep away from that old deep hole- remember the Xmas treexxx
Nonnie- I,m trying not to think about the ISPs imploding on Xmas Day !!! Glad you can still have dinner with your son and his wife it,ll be a special day.
I,m so impressed with your efforts today - I,ve still got trackie bottoms on!! But weirdly I always put earrings in. I hope your friend noticed how smart you looked.

We dropped my daughter and families presents round today for a very brief doorstep visit. It only seems a minute since we were there last year and going in to noise,laughter ,hugs and anticipation of a lovely family day. But I,m very mindful that for many people this year they would be happy to be able to do just that.
Bluesky,Joce,Rafichagran,Lavender and all BDG have a nice evening take carexx

BlueSky yes we are all in the same storm . I can sympathise
with your husband, thinking back to before the agoraphobia
pounced lockdowns would have been torture for me , working in the Cathedral on the Christmas flowers, helping to put out
the crib, going carol singing . This evening I would have been on the mountains looking for the Star of Bethlehem.

Scaredycat wow , what a great positive , yes we can look forward to lighter days . Next months we can start looking for
Snowdrops

Bluesky that is a very apt and good saying, and it makes good sense.

afternoon all xx annie we meant myself and hubby. My son is autistic and really doesnt understand the logic of Christmas and so he is happy we are not having a tree or decorations. My DS also has a shocking fear of Halloween, I cant buy things like shaped biscuits or coloured cakes that might be themed Halloween.

I have a confession.

I built a fortress around myself many years ago now. Every Christmas I crawl into it. When anybody asks what I'm doing for Christmas I say I'll be on my own and have something nice to eat and something nice to drink and I'll have films to watch and I'll be just fine. And it won't be true.

Evening all. I’ve had a busy day trying to find out what is going on with DH and make sure they are looking after him ok. Everyone is very kind to him but telling a patient in pain you feel sorry for him but not actually doing anything about it does not help. Fortunately, a very lovely pain management lady visits him twice today and was very proactive in getting him some help. Fingers crossed things get better.
Nonnie if only stopping ruminating was so easy, I do it to almost subconsciously. Glad your DS was able to cheer you up. ?
That’s a lovely song Annie. I sing to myself too.
I was listening to my online service from Canterbury the other day when they read out some verses from O little town of Bethlehem. For those who believe, it is such a lovely song. Brought a lump to my throat.
Bluesky how have you been today?
Scaredycat thanks for your kind thoughts. I also find new things to look at on my walks. I watch for buds and new flowers. Anything really. Nature is wonderful.
The past 2 nights I have been watching something about 12 new puppies on BBC iPlayer. I find it a lovely thing to watch before bed. Just looking at the little puppies interacting.
Nanny I am sorry your son gets so anxious about things. I can understand how Halloween might upset him but is the same true of Christmas. I would have thought the lights would be nice for him. Does he look after all those chickens on his own?
LHD I am sorry you will be on your own for Christmas. That will be true for many. Do you meet up with people at other times of year (not during lockdown obviously)

Doodle yes fingers crossed and my prayers are with you both x

LadyHonoria hello, your are on your own for Christmas ? me too, may I ask why you need a fortress ?

Evening everyone
I hope that everyone is ok and not too down about Christmas having to be very different this year.
Sleep well BDG x

doodle steph mainly looks after the chickens DS helps when he can but he works from home in I.T Its quite sad actually as the only emotion he understands is happiness. He doesnt understand fear or upset I liken him to spock from star trek he "sees" why there is upset but doesnt understand why people (mainly me!!) cry..... I went into the room to see binks today and he jumped up on the bed beside me and I was scared ha ha ha but he rubbed his head on me and was purring away when i stroked him its the closet ive been to him. Steph left the door open so he could start to explore but he didnt want to!! he was happy in his room bless him.

chrissy ive just seen your message re the cat. The true love of a pet owner comes at the end when the kindest thing to do is to let them go. Please try not to beat yourself up at the final act of pure love. I still cry about my beautiful tank. this is my 2nd Christmas without him (since someone stole him) and i am still totally heartbroken xx

Hi all x

Raining in Mid Wales.

Not going anywhere, not doing anything, not seeing anyone.

How is everyone?

Hello all morning Annie.
Same hear not going anywhere, not doing anything, not seeing anyone..
Not got much to say really hope all is well with you all, has well as can been..
I’m very mixed up with things at the minute, really don’t know how I feel.. I’m very sad crying a lot trying to get my head round everything like a lot more people, wish I had a wand..
Not been reading how everyone’s doing but you have all been in my prayers...
Hugs to all ?

Hello Joce Sorry you are crying alot. It's horrible feeling like that.

Hi all x Just to say hello nothing to report here, same as most people, doom and gloom in the news, weather doesn’t help. So just doing what we are all (allowed) to do. Try to have a good day x