Worry is my middle name

You are a good friend Zoe

I've never been a worrier. Despite possibly having a few things I should have been worried about!

Is it not that some people are just prone to worry and others don't?

A close friend of mine worries endlessly. She has had a terrible time during the pandemic. Convinced she'd catch it and die. Then stressing about her children and grandchildren getting it.

Nothing I can say to help her at all. I just listen .

MissChateline

Worrying is a total waste of energy. It doesn’t change anything or solve the perceived problem.

Hmmmm. I think we are all very aware of that, but it doesn’t often help.

My late mother was a 'born worrier' which may explain why I am not. It made life difficult when we were children because we mustn't do anything 'to worry mum'. I don't worry, but if there is anything on my mind, I often have weird dreams. I wonder what a psycho-analyst would have to say about that.

I m not an anxious person and don’t often worry about myself but children and grandchildren my imagination takes me to unknown places so I think I m definitely a recruit fir the worry club I see things happening far ahead of whatever problem there is my mind runs away with all the ‘what ifs’
And I know perfectly well worrying doesn’t help but so much easier to say than do

youtu.be/9YRjX3A_8cM

My niece recommends 'How to Stop Worrying' by Frank Tallis. He's a psychologist and a novelist, so it is very readable. In some areas, GPs "prescribe" books instead of pills. So you take your prescription to the library for your book. This is one of the books on their list!

Have you been in contact with your GP at all Lizzie?

Thanks Fanny. I’ve ordered some low dosage gummies - haven’t started using them yet. The Rescue Remedy sounds useful, although my anxiety tends to be worse in the morning and gradually eases (somewhat) throughout the day. I have read that the stress hormone cortisol is highest on awakening so it may be connected to that. Thankfully, I am able to sleep well - without a good night’s sleep every night to ‘re-set’ my mind, I’m not sure how I would manage!

Funnily enough, Lizzie, I was thinking about your Gummies thread this morning, I even mentioned it on another thread.
Anyway, I was thinking about starting a thread for all us anxiety sufferers. But it seems that it’s already here!
I’m currently on very strong painkillers (opioids) for chronic pain, and they have worked wonders for my anxiety, but obviously they’re not the best way to go about things!
I have found that antidepressants have kept my thinking a bit more stable. A lot of my anxiety revolves around work, but I don’t work anymore.
One thing that I’ve found helpful in the past was Bach Rescue Remedy, the Nighttime one.
I used to suffer terribly with thoughts going round and round at night, and the rescue remedy really seemed to work to switch them off.

Can I join the worry club please? Mr A says I worry about not having anything to worry about. Anxiety has affected my whole life although I don’t think it was recognised as that, everyone thought I was just very shy. I have got worse as I got older, tried yoga and tai chi, dabbled in various relaxation and meditation techniques and had counselling and medication but nothing stops that early morning worry list from popping into my head. If there is a magic cure I would love to know what it is.

I’m a member of the ‘Worry Club’ too. I’m really interested to hear how others cope with it. Any recommended strategies gratefully received. I’m sure those of us who worry know it’s not productive or useful but it’s virtually impossible to ‘just stop worrying’. Believe me - I’ve tried (and am still trying). It’s definitely got worse as I’ve got older.

Hello Newatthis
Congratulations on your non worrying state!
How on earth did you achieve it? What do you mean by ‘going cold turkey’? Thank you!

I too was a serial worrier, in the end the worry made me ill. A year or so ago I went cold turkey on it and now live by the mantra ‘if you can’t do anything about it then don’t worry about it’. It takes a while and I’m not saying that niggles don’t creep in but I stand firm with them and mentally push them out and banish them.

I am the same. I don’t worry normally. Everything is the worst case scenario and tips me into high anxiety. You are not alone.

vampirequeen. The never ending knot in the stomach. Worrying for their future about problems that have not arisen, but might arise.

I don't know if this will help, but I find that it helps me to get a sheet of paper and write down a list of what is worrying me.

I think this is because it allows me to compartmentalise things, so that I can think of them one at a time rather than them being muddled together in some sort of tsunami of different worries all interacting coming at me together.

I’m a lifelong worrier too, I’m a rather imaginative person, anything we planned to do, I could think up scenarios where it all went wrong. It came to a head last year when I was selling and buying a house, developed potentially serious health problems and found myself with no social life due to lockdowns. I got very stressed out and anxious. Fortunately, during the first lockdown, I’d installed a meditation app on my tablet because I thought this was a good chance to try it out. It’s been brilliant at teaching me how to control my mind and be more positive and relaxed. Being settled in a new home has greatly helped of course as has finding my health problems aren’t drastically serious, indeed much aggravated by the stress. But without the meditation, I’m convinced my brain would have metaphorically exploded due to the state of anxiety I was getting in.

I'm afraid that I am a serial worrier! At the moment though it does seem as it is one thing after another. DD had a stroke last August and nearly died, it transpires she has two AVM 's present in her head, in situ since she was born, and one ruptured! DH is a prostate cancer surviver (10 Years!) but is now awaiting a new hip and is very lame and in a lot of pain . Me, I noticed what looks like a small mole last Sunday, today I saw our GP and have been referred to a Dermatologist for a 2 week emergency appointment with suspected nodule melanoma! Hopefully, it may not be, but if it is then fingers crossed it has been caught in time. Oh dear I do feel very anxious!

have you tried CBT therapy?

I woke shouting my GD’s name. I’d lost her at a Fayre but there was a panic on (not sure what about) . People running hither and thither , screaming and frightened. I lost sight of my GD and I was calling and calling for her.
She’s nearly 19 and had just gone off to university. ?
Must be that I’m worrying about her, going off on her own into the scary new world.

Hi everyone,
How nice to know that us worriers are not alone.!
I worry so much more about my grandchildren than I ever remember doing about my own children. I think that it is an age thing . Perhaps we have more time to worry.
I know that I wake at night and go through my mind to remember what my current worry is!
Very draining but so nice to know that others feel the same. Makes me feel a bit more ‘normal’
Xx

Thanks Bluesky,grandma Jean,Nadateurbe,and Fannycorn for your acknowledgement!! ??

Redhead56

First I would like to say welcome to Gransnet you will get plenty of support on here. I worry when I am around the GC I did help with them but stopped as it was becoming too much. I am not quick off the mark these days because of osteo arthritis and it does slow me down a lot.

We went to our DD last week and we took the GC to a park. I was positively stressed out in case she fell off the slide. I even told my DD I wouldn't go there again this not not my usual behaviour at all. I have never been like this before and it does get me down. I think it's age mind you this last year or so has knocked the wind from most people's sails.

People I have known for years who have always been confident are suffering depression. I think we will have to pamper ourselves this year to come out of the doldrums.

I hope you can find a way to relax and not worry so much. I have just been sitting watching the bees on my veg patch that relaxes me. Take care and let us know how everything goes ?

I had a nightmare the other night in which my granddaughter was on a swing and her dad was pushing her higher and higher and higher until I almost couldn’t see her. I woke up in a complete state. I have to have something on in the background at night or I can’t sleep for worrying: Bob Ross or something from BBC Sounds. I once asked a nurse at the doctors if I was a hypochondriac and she said ‘no dear, but you are a worrier’. I do try to only worry about things that I can do something about but the slightest problem concerning my family and I go straight into a worry fest.

I think it helps talking about it, I’ve had this health anxiety since I was a young teenager and at the time, I thought I was the only one. Good to learn about other people’s coping strategies too.