Black Dog 10

Morning everyone.
Annie- so glad you had your lovely day withMT and also that your bungalow got her seal of approval!! She must have been so pleased to be with you after so long.
I think the Pandemic has magnified lots of problems for everyone and as Doodle says concentration is really difficult with so many new fears and questions whizzing round in our heads. So I guess’s your increased OCD could be explained by that. I know my anxiety is triggered very quickly by very small things now .
I hope you have a good day today Annie .
Doodle- I find that I have to have a reading head on and then I really enjoy it. I have read quite a few books this last year but in fits and starts. It really is all about concentration isn’t it. I must admit I play games on iPad and then feel guilty for wasting time!
Sorry you have some local worries hope they will soon be resolved.I find it hard to shake off a worry once it plants itself in my annoying anxious head.
This weekend we had some sad news about one of our nearby GD , her heart is broken? knowing someone you love so much is hurting is so sad.
Nonnie - thinking of you
Love to all BDG hope your day is warmer than it is here☔️

Annie I’m so pleased your MT came to see you, you must have been thrilled. I m glad she’s still checking up on you. ?
I’m finding that I have difficulty in concentrating these days, my mind keeps jumping from one thing to another,
Although we are not going out, there are some happenings where we live which are of concern to us and that takes up a lot of my thinking time.
I am trying to make myself read more and restrict playing games and letting my mind ramble. My ability to concentrate has got less and less as the years pass.
Hope all the gang are doing ok. X

Hi all x how is everyone ?

It was wonderful seeing my mini tornado yesterday, the first thing she did after greeting me was - checked the bungalow to
see if it was clean, it met with her approval.

I have been aware for some time that my OCD is rather active,
anyone find their problems are stronger ?

nonnie thinking of you x

Annie I’m sure as your DGC get older and learn more about life they will appreciate what your daughter went through and the fact that she would never have hurt them if she could help it. Hope you had a good time with MT.
Nonnie how are you getting on? Hope you are ok.
Scaredycat wow what a lot of DGC and and GGC. However do you keep up ?. Funny isn’t it how all your children and DGC can be different but you love them all just the same. I couldn’t be doing without any of mine.
Nice thought to remember fathers. Mine was a lovely man.
Hope all the BDG have a good day x

Hi all x

Saredycat thank you, I pray they will in time separate the illness from their mother.

nonnie sending hugs x

Everyone, enjoy the day with loved ones x

Good morning all
Annie - the illness that claimed your daughter is so devastating . My sister and I were adults when my Mum took her life but it does lasting damage . We just understand that it was the illness that hurt us not her. That is a very hard lesson for young people to learn but I,m sure in time they will be able to talk about their Mum and remember the lovely times they had with her. It’s lovely they were all able to get together yesterday to celebrate MT and her Dad.
I hope you have a very happy day with MT she sounds the loveliest young lady. Will be thinking of you.
Doodle- glad you had a good time with your family and enjoy today with DS1. Happy Father’s Day.
Nonnie- I hope you are feeling better today.x
Rafichagran- between us we have - including step ones- 12 GC and 5 GGC . They are all very different but all very much loved and as you say some are easier than others! Most of them do not live near by but we are very lucky to have them.
I hope you are well
I hope all BDG have a good Father’s Day and remembering all our dear Fathers past and present XX

Hope you are feeling better Nonnie. Are you still in hospital?

Annie that is so sad. Mental illness is like a physical one in many respects.. No matter how much you love someone, you can’t walk on two broken legs and you cant make yourself well just by wishing it, It’s such an awful illness because it affects so many.
Your DGC are still relatively young. I think as they get older they will be more understanding. They have had a lot of hurt to deal with. I know that over the years, I now understand a lot of things I felt differently about when I was younger.
It is lucky they have each other and you are there for them too.
I hope MT has a happy birthday and you enjoy the visit.?
Nonnie how are you doing? Are you still in hospital?
Take care allx

rafichagran my three are adults, and so different, I worry they
cannot come to terms with their mother’s illness and suicide, I hope they will one day understand it was her illness which hurt
them and not her. My grandson adored her, I pray he will talk to me about it, I weep when I think of the fun loving child and
teenager who is now so closed up. My elder granddaughter does talk to me about her hurt, I want to take it away for her,
my mini tornado doesn’t want to speak of her mother, she did say to me ‘she was mentally ill’. Mental illness causes so much pain for the sufferer and those who love them.

Doodle my mini tornado is coming tomorrow, it’s her birthday, this evening my two granddaughters, their partners,
my grandson and their father are celebrating Mini tornado’s
birthday, her finishing university and Father’s Day, she is coming to me for her birthday.

I am thankful they are so close but admit when they are together as they are this evening I ache that my darling daughter isn’t there, she loved them so much and hurt them so much.

Hope nonnie is making a speedy recovery

I have three DGC too. I love them all dearly. Each one different with skills , talents and personalities.
rafinchagran I cannot understand people who don’t have feelings for their DGC. I worry about mine all the time.
Did your MT come today Annie or is it tomorrow.?
We went for a lovely meal with DS2 and family last night. Such a joy to see them all. DS 1 coming over tomorrow which will be nice.
Hope all the gang are ok. X

How lovely Annie I too have3 Grandchildren. They are so different. One of my Grand children is not a people pleaser and does not come across as nice as the other two, yet I see someone from a early age who was kind, caring and never manipulative. He is no Angel and like all children he can be daring and badly behaved, but his Mother does not let him get away with it.
I am so glad you have that bond with her. I love them equally, and the middle one has taught me to look at other qualities children have, which is hard as sometimes it is easier with the others.
MT will be a joy to you this weekend as well.

Hi all x how is everyone ?

nonnie hope you are ok, x

rafichagran, thank you, yes I love seeing her, I love my three
grandchildren but have a bond with her, she was rather a difficult little tot, was tested to see if she was ‘on the spectrum’,
she wasn’t, but gosh she could exhaust her parents, for some
reason she was always so good with me, she is my joy .

How are you?

Scaredycat so happy for you, you enjoyed yourself and didn’t let anxiety spoil the afternoon, definitely a ? x

Doodle don’t know yet if she is coming Saturday or Sunday.
Enjoy meeting your family for a meal this evening x

May I say to all ? Please give the rain back to Wales , thank you ? x

Enjoy your time with MT Annie. I know you are looking forward to it very much.

Oh Nonnie I’m so sorry. I hope you are ok. Thank you for letting us know.
Hope they can find out what’s causing the problem. Much love x
scaredycat glad you went to tea and made the effort. What’s more, you enjoyed it. ?
Annie is it today your MT is coming or tomorrow?
It is pouring with rain here. Has been all day.
We are going for a meal with DS2 and family tonight. Fortunately we can drive to the car park and hopefully park near the entrance. Hope we don’t have to stand outside till they are ready for us ?

Hi everyone.
Annie- so happy for you that MT is visiting this weekend. You must be so thrilled to be seeing her again.I hope you have a wonderful time together.
Joce - hope all is well with you.
Nonnie- Oh dear so sorry that you are in hospital. I hope they soon find out what’s wrong and you can go home again. In the meantime rest and take care. Thinking of youxx
Yesterday’s afternoon tea at my friends was really nice . The rain actually stopped for a few hours so we could be outside. I still feel a bit nervous with a bigger group of people but it was such a treat to do something that was like it used to be. Rain back again today with a vengeance.?
Wishing you all a good weekend.xx

Hi all x

nonnie my love so sorry , how are you this afternoon?

Please keep in contact with us .

Hi all x Nonnie what happened? Sorry to hear you are in hospital but you are in the best place as they say. Hope you’ll soon be let home x

Hi all. Only got my phone so can’t type much. Taken into hospital early yesterday , still here. Lots of tests, nothing found yet. Possibly a reaction to OTC antihistamines. Put me in a room with 5 old people! One side hasn’t eaten for 3 days, the other is thin, feeble and very yellow fortunately the 3 opposite look as if they may leave.

Been visited by physios and OT touting for work I don’t need. Now waiting for the next person they pass me on to looking for a reason

Annie that’s brilliant new, ????
Hope everyone doing alright..
have a good evening all ?

Oh Annie I’m so pleased MT is coming. No wonder you’re excited. Glad you went to see your shrubs just wish those ramps would arrive sooner.
Hope it’s a bit cooler for you today. We had some rain this morning but it’s been very hot and humid since. I have a feeling we are waiting for a downpour.
Hope all the gang are ok x

Hi all x

No sunshine in Mid Wales.

Lockdown extended to 19th July for England, will this stop any
plans for you ?

Went on wheelchair this morning to see my shrubs, would love
to go out there but ramps not being done until August.

My mini tornado is coming to see me this weekend, I feel like a
child waiting for Father Christmas.

Annie I don’t take heat well and yes it does cause anxiety to rise. Also I think those who are affected by heat get more exhausted and less able to cope.
Nonnie where abouts are you situated? Why won’t you be able to see family in the summer? That is very sad.
DH and I have been cruising many times with the old people’s cruise line ?. The crew are wonderful and very protective of their passengers. The ships we go on are small and the ratio of crew to passengers is very high. We know what their level of cleanliness and COVID prep is and we are happy. Basically our situation is that we don’t know how much time we have left and DH wants to enjoy it while he can. We are more worried about not going than going to be honest.
Why is it that some companies take advantage of some workers. My DS worked through the whole of last summer without a break. He was the only one not on Furlough. He was too important they said. At the end of the summer he was made redundant.
Good you had a nice visit with your DS. I have been letting the housework slip so today tackled the kitchen. Fortunately I was interrupted half way through by a phone call from ‘other’ grandma, so I will have to finish tomorrow ?
Scaredycat we have had 4 cancelled cruises so far. Waiting to hear the outcome of what will happen to the next one.
As I said. No qualms about going. I have read all the things they are doing to keep us safe and am happy. They are the first cruise line to have Lloyds accreditation for their COVID status.
Ah another like me. Don’t look forward in case you’re disappointed. Why are we like that ?
Have a lovely time at your friends birthday.

Hello all on this sunny afternoon
EllieAnne- glad you are back home safely .You must feel so pleased to have been able to spend that time with your DD.
Doodle- I hope you will be able to have your cruise Round Britain sounds interesting. It will be good to hear all about it and how you felt on board post Covid. We love to cruise and had 2 cancelled last year but we haven,t booked replacements for next year yet as we are still a bit apprehensive.
I have a real problem being able to look forward to things though as I anticipate problems such a lot. I,m not a misery though really!!
Annie- Brilliant that you got in your wheelchair and were able to feel the air and see your shrubs again. Your lady sounds a kind helpful person and I,m glad you have her.
Nonnie- sorry it seems you won’t be able to see your family yet. I don’t think I will see my son until next year?
Yes being with more people is still daunting but it’s getting better especially if you know them. My friend has her ‘big’ birthday afternoon tea in her garden tomorrow with 14 but they are all double jabbed so I,ll be going to help her celebrate.
Your poor son must be exhausted with all that work especially now it is so warm . Hope his workload eases off for him soon. So nice for you to be with family and have his favourite roast.
Hope you have a good rest in your lounger this afternoon you deserve it after all your hard work. Take advantage of the sun as Thunder Storms are looming on the horizon tonight.
Love to allx