visits and phone calls and emails etc when you're feeling poorly

Who can get that? Can anyone ask,or is it for over 70's only?

Hope you get well soon Marmite.

You have my sympathy Marmite. Mr P is just getting over shingles after 6 weeks. The pain was immense and nowhere was comfortable - he didn't want to talk much either and certainly no fussing. I hope you start to feel better soon.

Nannan it’s for over 70 s

@Nannan2. The Shingles vaccine is restricted to age 70 or over, as it’s expensive to administer and there has to be a very good reason to offer it before this age. I developed Rheumatoid Arthritis last year and before beginning treatment which would compromise my immune system, the consultant tried to arrange for the Pneumonia and Shingles vaccines. My GP surgery agreed to the Pneumonia vaccine but would not give me the Shingles vaccine as they didn’t think it was warranted. However, I could have had it if I’d gone private and paid £150 !!

From government website:
Shingles is caused by varicella zoster virus (VZV), the same virus that causes chickenpox. After a person recovers from chickenpox, the virus stays dormant (inactive) in their body. The virus can reactivate later, causing shingles

Hope you recover soon, Marmite. Awful feeling to be so unwell you can’t summon the energy to talk to your friends and family

After seeing my husband with shingles I had the vacillation as soon as I could I was so painful for him

... to those who say you're lucky to have people around you that care - yes, you are, and I'm sure you appreciate that fact.

But sometimes, when you are in intense pain and just don't know what to do with yourself, you cannot focus on 'chatting' because you can't focus on anything other than trying to alleviate the pain. And it wears you out.

My partner is in this situation at the moment (sciatic pain from spinal stenosis)... sometimes he stands or sits with his teeth gritted and his face contorted - he just wants to be left alone to deal with it. After the intensity of the pain wears off, he falls asleep in the chair, completely and utterly exhausted.

I hope people understand - and if they do, they will not take offence if you tell them that you simply cannot talk. The body shuts down the mind when you're really suffering.

Shingles is absolutely awful Marmite32 and I hope you feel better soon. This too shall pass.

Shingles can be very painful. Nice of people to call but if they email you don't need to answer straight away. If it's a mobile phone put it on silent or set notifications to be silent. House phone is more difficult but you could use answering machine or lift mouthpiece off till you feel better. I know what you mean as it is nice to have family and friends but sometimes you need some peace.

Shingles vaccine is available if over 70.

Sorry your feeling so poorly. It is not something I've suffered from. Hopefully your friends will understand that you don't feel well if you can tell them when they phone.

Hwrry you ars so right! I agree with other just text or don't answer phone that's what I do

Hetty!

I remember my friend saying that having shingles was worse than having a baby! I hope that you get well soon. Perhaps just post a general message to everyone saying that you're not up to chatting, right now, but will put out a bulletin every day or two to let them know how you're getting on.
I'm 82, and have never been offered the shingles jab. I don't think that I ever had chicken-pox, though, so I may be ok.

You have my sympathy Marmite32, shingles is so debilitating. The last time I had it I was ill for months, the pain was horrendous.

Just be honest with family and friends and say you need a little space until you’re feeling better. Don’t just ignore calls, but when answering just say you’re not up to talking and need to sleep and will catch up when you’re feeling up to having a conversation.

Can you send out a group email - (BCC) people if they don't know one another? Explain what you are feeling. Thank them for their concern yada yada yada. The problem with not answering calls/texts etc is that people then wonder if you are having even bigger problems and will try even more to contact you. Another idea is to have a contact person who keeps people in the loop. I know people are concerned about you but it's reasonable of you to say you don't want to talk about it. The problem of just cutting people off is that they might just cut you off later if /when you do need help. So it's a balance.

Wildswan16 is giving you perfect advice. If you follow it you won't have this problem. I hope your shingles gets better soon, it is a horrible condition.

Sorry to hear you're not well, hope it clears up soon. My Dad had it years ago and said it was very painful.
I know what you mean though - I'm not a crabby person normally but when I don't feel well I withdraw and go quiet and like you just don't want to talk about it.
I've just found out today that I have to go to Christies for a full hysterectomy due to a "suspicious" cyst.
I don't have any close family left but I'm lucky to have some good friends who mean well and will offer help and although I don't like putting anyone out may have to accept it over the next couple of months. Like you though I don't want to be mithered (sorry it's awful saying that) every day to see how I am. I just want to focus on getting through it. Hope I can tactfully say I appreciate the offer but do you mind if I ring you if I need anything to see if you can help.

Sorry but I think you are lucky for so many friends and relatives to call. However, I do appreciate that you may not feel like chatting, but surely it’s nice to know they care?
How do they know you are ill?
Are they ringing to offer practical help or cheer you up?
How got deal with these calls?
As people have suggested, please change your answer machine message (if you have one)
Suggest they message you but don’t get upset if you don’t answer immediately, as you are resting etc. (Sorry, but after all you seem to be able to grumble on here, which would upset me to see, if I was your friend or relative)
Nominated a friend and/or relative to field the rest, ie they keep people up to date with your recovery so they don’t need t disturb you.
Hoping you have a speedy recovery, it is an awful, painful and debilitating virus. Good Luck

Shingles vaccine is a live vaccine so you have to avoid anyone immunosuppressed. Just for info.

Could you just say thank you for calling and how much you appreciate it but currently you’re feeling so unwell that you don’t feel like chatting?

Good advice. Or maybe send an email saying that as well as how much you appreciate their kindness and that you will be in touch when feeling a little better.

I was in hospital for a month (not shingles) and I grew weary of so having so many visitors. In the end I asked them for a weekend off and they were all so kind and understanding. Nobody minded.
I do hope you feel better soon. Is shingles adult chicken pox?

Marmite 32 you have my sympathy. Tomorrow I will be entering week 3 of Shingles and the pain just doesn't let up!
Its reducing me to tears which is unusual for me. Been back to GP today and have been given Nortryptiline to help with nerve pain, we will see if it works! Incidentally I had the shingles vaccine 3 years ago, it clearly didn't work for me. PS I just let the answerphone take the call if I dont feel like answering.