Black DOG 13

Whiff It's astonishing that you've had pain all these years without any diagnosis. You surely need to be seen by a Neurologist or Orthopaedic. I hope you get the help you need.
Wyllow3 The life your ex has got is not your fault or responsibility. What type of counselling are you waiting for? (I'm now getting CBT, had been waiting 6 months).

How is everyone today? Son1 and his girls enjoyed Goose fair (it's a Nottingham event of many years) last night and eventually got home at 11pm! They got up late this morning and went home at 11. I've had to change my bedding and wash it all, after Mr Cooper was sick on it at midnight - poor boy. He'd been eating grass yesterday - but he's fine today. It's sunny but really cold, so we're not going out but are faffing about indoors. Hope everyone has a decent day x

Its very specific Abuse counselling by an agency for women run by women, free but a long wait list HVDY.

One of my "things" because of teenage Stuff is that I fear I am Terribly Responsible and can cause Awful Things to happen to those I'm close to. Not proportionate to reality, is problem, and one of those things having to live with as can't wipe it out.

Poor Mr Cooper! Hope he is a little better now. Its been the kind of day thats sunny with autumn leaves whirling round cheerfully, I had a good yoga sesh.

Wyllow- glad you got out in the sun- it’s a good tired brought on by fresh air and exercise. It,sounds,a,lovely place where you walked.
Thanks for the tinnitus tips- I have had it for 41 years since the year my Mum took her life and it has been 24/7 ever since.
Please,don’t feel guilty- you have done more than most would have to ascertain your ex safety.He should feel guilty not you-
You are the victim and are still suffering. Hope you get the help you need soon.
Whiff- you deal so bravely with your pain- you are right though that we have to deal with our own mental and physical health the best way we can. The unpredictability of your pain must be very difficult to cope with. x
VioletSky- hope the sun is shining on you today.
HVDY- I,ve heard of the GooseFair but wasn’t sure wwhat it was. It’s good that old traditions are carried on so the present generation can enjoy them too.
oh dear poor Mr Cooper and poor you- more washing!!!
Am I right in thinking that cats eat grass deliberately so they can be sick and get rid of whatever is bothering them- or is that an OldWives tale?

Pleased to say no ill effects from the 2 jabs yesterday except feeling a bit tired. Had a lovely FaceTime with my sister ( my nephew is recovering well physically from his accident and heart attack but still fragile mentally.But he is trying)
Have been out for a walk - a few sore bits still from my Ivy adventure but what do I expect at my great age!!!!
When I walk I often think of the terrible times in my life but it helps me being outside and I just need to do it sometimes. I don’t talk about it much - just remember and try and deal with it .
Annie - hope your bed is lovely and comfortable. Sleep well tonightxxx
Doodle,EllieAnne,Joce,SweetPeaSue, and all BDG hope you have had a peaceful Sundayxxxx

Wyllow3 Good luck with the counselling,when you get it. I hope it'll help.

ScaredyCat Yes, cats (and dogs) do eat grass when they feel a bit off. He's ok now, but I'll keep my eye on him. He is the equivalent of a gentleman of about 92 now . Tinnitus is horrible, isn't it. Yours started after the suicide of your mum, which must have been very traumatic for you. Mine has been there every minute of every day since a car crash, i 2007. (where have all those years gone)

I hope everyone has had a pleasant Sunday. x

A horrible trigger Scaredycat hope tips help. I'm so glad you went out for the walk, here it was sunny with autumn leaves whirring round like here. Sometimes walks help sort of process things into a bit of perspective?

Actually now you mention it I've heard that about cats too.

(I will be contacting his workers cos even if they dont listen re safety concerns re his activities, I'm almost certain he isn't having his regular check ups for Atrial fibrillation plus borderline diabetes so put it in their laps.)

"Nice Treat News"
1. .just ordered a v neck button up cable long length cardigan with pockets just the thing to be cosy in
2. Earlier charity shop modest haul and fun.

Annie I do hope you are OK xxx

Scaredycat hope you are ok after your double jabs. DH was fine but I got the shakes and shivers for a couple of days and felt quite rough. Fine after that though.
Glad your foot is better. We went for a nice walk this afternoon in the sunshine.
My tinnitus is better but I still feel rough. Slightly nauseous, dull headache and aching face. I have suffered from the same many times before. It is all either tension or muscle related. Did Covid test to be on the safe side but that was ok.
I will do my usual trick tonight of sleeping with a rolled up towel round my neck to see if that helps.
HVDY hope your son and the girls had a good time at the fair. Children love them don’t they.
Wyllow sorry you too have suffered tinnitus. 40 years is a long time. I think it could be stress with me. I will try your tip thank you. I hope you have a better night tonight. You obviously worry about your ex a lot. It is up to his support workers to help him now but I’m sure your contact will be helpful to them. Hope you get the counselling soon.
Sweetpeasue I love pansies. My favorites. I love their little faces. ?
Whiff so sorry you have had such pain for a long time. I wonder what could cause it. I had intermittent stabbing pains in my left leg for many years. Would come in without waning and be so bad. Mine relates to a cyst in my leg but apart from the bouts of pain doesn’t cause problems so I leave it alone. It’s got better over recent years. Sorry about your fall and brise. That sounds nasty. Hope you GP can help.
violetsky how are you doing? Hope you had a good weekend.

HVDY glad the girls enjoyed the fair. Oh no your poor bedding ?. Cats are often sick after eating grass aren’t they, do they do it to make themselves sick if they feel poorly. Hope he’s feeling better now.
Scaredycat good to hear your nephew is a bit better.
Wyllow hope you get your support soon. So sorry you feel so responsible for things that obviously aren’t your fault.
Your new cardi sounds nice. Just what you need for the winter.
Annie we are all wondering if the new bed is in yet. Take care x

Doodle I hope you feel better. Re your aching face - it's not Trigeminal neuralgia? I hope it's eased off anyway.

How is everyone today? It's bright and sunny. I'm taking the boy to the vet again at 11. He didn't eat anything at all yesterday (even ignored a tin of tuna) and isn't his usual self.

Morning all

Got email off to Ex's workers after overnight pondering...actually worth it in sleep cost as laid out coherently and well in the end. Nice natter with hairdresser upcoming I do like her.

Doodle hope the flare up receded further and you had a more restful night.

HVDY all the best at the vets, very worrying.

Hi all x

WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY

It takes more courage to ask for help than to suffer in silence .

Wyllow3 Glad you managed to state what you needed to in your email. Good that you've got a hairdresser you get on with. Mine's an Italian man, very nice.

Anniebach It certainly does take courage (even more so for men). How's the bed?

Mr Cooper saw the vet - she thinks he might have Pancreatitis, brought on by the anaesthetic the other day, she said. He went berserk when she tried to examine him but she managed to give him a painkiller injection, which settled him down. He's since eaten a bit of food, and I've got to see how he goes. IF he's still not right tomorrow, it might mean something sinister, the vet says - which would mean the end . x

HVDY Oh no, poor Mr Cooper and you must be so worried about him. Pancreatitis is very painful for humans so not sure what it's like for cats. I hope he gains his appetite back. You will know he's getting better when he starts to eat again. ?
Anniebach Hope you had a good visit from MT. I didn't realise it was World Mental Health Day. Have you slept in your bed yet?
Doodle The tinnitus sounds so frustrating. It must be deeply annoying when you're trying to sleep. I do hope the flare up of your headache and facial pain has gone.
WhiffThinking of you and hoping your pain hasn't been too bad today. You have so much to put up with right now. I wonder if the worry about the tribunal is setting off your pain too. Hope you've not had any more falls.
ScaredycatI had my jabs last week. Had them on different days though and different arms. My arms tend to get very stiff too afterwards. It must be better than a nasty dose of covid or flu though. Hope Mr Cox hasn't been after your pansies. (sounds a bit weird!)
Wyllow I'm glad you feel as if you've done what you can relaying info to your ex support workers. I hope you can relax a bit now. Also that you get your counselling soon. The Gym and yoga must be very helpful to you for your physical and MH.

I had a painful day yesterday with another urine infection. Luckily had some antibiotics on standby but taken specimen in today to make sure. Guess my immune system must be low but the pain much relieved today. Hope everyone is getting by best they can. Aren't the colours of the leaves beautiful in the sun. We need to notice these things don't we?
I can't bear the news lately. I'm trying hard not to keep thinking of bad things. Night time is worst for everyone I think. But the dawn always follows. Love to all.

HVDY- poor Mr Cooper do hope he starts to turn the corner by tomorrow. It will depend if he can eat and whether he is in pain - so sad. Fingers crossed for him
Doodle- hope you soon feel better those symptoms sound so uncomfortable. Do you have medication that you can take as you have had it before?

That rolled up towel trick is good for easing neck discomfort - do you have a microwave neck warmer - It really helps as I have cervical spondylosis and it is very comforting.
We,re both ok after the jabs thank you - I just felt very tired. Last night I slept 8 hours straight don’t think I have ever done that before - great side effect!!
I think pansies faces are THE reason to buy them!! We have a white one with a purple middle and he has a very cross face?
Wyllow- like the sound of your new cardigan- I love long jumpers.
Hope you feel more relaxed now that you have sent the Email.
Hairdressers are such good company- I love mine too.
Annie- we are all on tenterhooks about your bed!!!! Hope you have been able to sleep more comfortably although I expect it took a while to get used to again.?
SweetPeaSue- glad your antibiotics did the trick and that you are able to enjoy the simple pleasures that we sometimes take for,granted. Autumn sunshine is special.
As for the news it is relentlessly awful. Most of it is beyond our control so I,m trying only to deal with the things I can control and block out the rest. Fingers in ears and La La La eh!!
Love to allxx

ScaredycatI'm doing it! 'La La La!'
(DH has news on soon).

Unlike others I don’t like going to the hairdresser. I hate looking in the mirror because I think I am ugly and find chatting an effort.
I hope mr cooper recovers. Poor puss?
I’m so down . Had arranged with d in l to go to see little grandson today but a lot of our church have Covid including my friend. I’ve tested negative but so did she to start with so I didn’t go. Couldn’t risk passing something on. Coming after a horrible weekend . I’m at the wanting to run away stage again.

Ellie Anne I'm so sorry you've had such a bad weekend. You sound very low indeed. You are not alone about the hairdressers. I believe I saw a thread on GN about this very thing. Lots hate going and I'm one of them. I've not been for 18mths. I need to. I'm sure you must have been looking forward to seeing your grandson so much. It's a big disappointment. There will be another day. As for wanting to run away from 'it all', I'm not surprised you feel this way with your home-life as it is. Remember though you do have friends and that friend in church will be there after covid. I'm so sorry for your sadness right now. Your family are so lucky to have you, you do much for them. Adult 'children' are often so busy with their own lives they forget to say how valuable a parent is to them. But I'm sure you are appreciated for being a mum and grandmother. Hope you feel better soon. Hugs x

www.mind.org.uk/get-involved/world-mental-health-day/?utm_source=instagram&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=world-mental-health-day-2022&utm_content=public&dm_i=CZC,81OHO,ETSD8H,WX9CG,1

Ellie Anne not seeing your grandson must have hit very hard indeed after the weekend.
I used to hate looking at my face and I think it was part, for me, of bad depression, a sort of self hate. I’m sorry the weekend was so horrible. Ellie, come in next time here if you can? This thread cant guarantee someone will be in, but share if you like and you WILL be “heard”.

(My hairdresser of 9 years is one of those rare people I managed to carry on going to though all, tho not often. She knew, it didnt scare her, and was just quiet)

HVDY Poor Mr Cooper - I share you hope for the best - but come in for a hug if its not so good x

Sweetpeasue
So glad the pain has lessened today. Yes, the leaves are lovely in the sun atm.
I agree about being careful as regards watching or listening to the news, its important to find the right balance for you.

*Scaredycat” great sleep there. Really MUST get some little smily pansies and a few bulbs.

Ellie Anne so sorry you didn’t get your trip to see your DGS.
Look at the positive, you DIL did agree for you to go and see him so as soon as you know you are in the clear you can try and re arrange. I know it’s a let down but at least it shows you are trying to keep them safe.
So sorry you’ve had a awful weekend. I hope whatever has upset you get resolved soon. You have so much going on, not surprised you’re upset.
HVDY I had to look that up ?. No it’s not that thanks for the thought. I don’t have any severe pain it’s more like a dull ache in my jaw and up the sides of my face. Tinnitus is a bet better but now my shoulder hurts. I wonder if I’ve pulled a muscle doing something and that is the cause of all this.
I’m so sorry to hear about Mr Cooper, I hope he’s ok but if it is the end you can take comfort in knowing he’s been well looked after. So upsetting for you.
Wyllow glad you got your letter written. That will be a weight off your mind. Hope the hairdresser visit goes well.
Annie yes you’re right it does. Did you have a good day with MT? How’s the bed?
Sweetpeasue so sorry yet another urine infection. Good you had some medication ready. Hope you are feeling better now.
No don’t watch the news if it brings you down. There have been many times I have gone for long periods not watching it due to all the upsetting content. Do you enjoy any serials on TV? Nice post to Ellie Anne
Been to post office to send a parcel today. Had to rush as I thought it was going to close early. I hadn’t realised how unfit I am. Walking quickly made my legs ache so much. I need more exercise that’s for sure.
Had a chat with DS1 tonight. Nice to catch up on their news.
Hope everyone has a peaceful night and I hope your new bed is comfy Annie

SweetPeaSue UTIs are horrible, aren't they? I hope the antibiotics are helping. I no longer look at the news on TV. I read the Daily Mail online but scroll through much of it - so many things are out of our control, it does me no good to know about most of it.
ScaredyCat 8 hours of sleep - great. You must have needed it. Pansies are lovely. I've got some Violas (they're a smaller version of Pansies I think) in troughs on the patio.
EllieAnne I hate looking at myself when I'm at the hairdresser. The lights aren't flattering, so I don't think any of us look great in there. You're not ugly. I find all the inane chat a bit overwhelming, so I read a magazine sometimes.
Sorry you didn't get to see your GS. Kepp posting on here, we all empathise with your low mood. Tomorrow is a new day.
Wyllow3 I've had the self-loathing you mention. It's part of depression, isn't it, and not nice.
Doodle My pillow is a shaped, memory foam one, which has really helped when I've had shoulder/neck pain. It was from Amazon, but Argos sell them too.

Great news here - Mr Cooper ate some tune this afternoon, then went back to bed. We went out for a pub dinner, left the heating on for him, and he greeted us as we caame in. He's had a bit of Felix and is now on my husband's lap. I think he'll be ok.

Other good news - Son1 passed his driving test today - and he's talking about looking for a flat next.
Hope everyone has a restful night xx

He's doing well x

Oh he's a bonny boy HVDY. He's got his eye on you. So pleased he's OK.

Hi all x

Sorry not been with you for few days, have problems, not sleeping in bed, Mini Tornado couldn’t come at weekend and
was very upset. Was volunteering yesterday for World Mental
Health Day.

How is everyone?

Thank you all for your kindness. I’ve been helping our church over 50s group this morning . Am very good at putting a face in.
Hvdy that’s great that your son passed his test. My d in l has started learning but she is hating it. She’s so nervous.
I’m not feeling any better.
Annie I hope you get things sorted out soon and mt can manage to visit.

Anniebach and Ellie big virtual bear hugs for some relief from your practical and emotional pain coming your way.

(Very good cat news)

I had a nice long chat with DS last night.

It will be some time before I find out if my email helped Ex at all. I hate to think of him out on the streets most of the time -no heating in flat and begging as he isn't managing resources he has, and not taking the help there is - but nothing I can do.