Black Dog 15

Wyllow3 I agree entirely with what you've said. We're all here for each other, but I have now been put off a bit about putting any cheerful news on here, for fear that some people will analyse it and think "it's noT how BD used to be" or "It's not what BD is about. I feel guilty that my life is happier than it was before, which is ridiculous. I'm glad you've got the appointment, and I hope the chat with your son goes/went well.

SweetpeaSue I hope your bowel pain has settled donw and that your husband is ok today. Best wishes for him for tomorrow's appointment.

Doodle I hope you and your husband are ok today. No, family all ok, thanks. I'm fed-up about all this on the thread re Annie, Joce, etc. I feel guilty that my life is quite happy at the moment, as though I should only be on BD if/when I'm sad or unhappy etc.

I hope all BDers are ok today x

Doodle

Thanks Doodle I have had better times, M.E. seems to rule life at the minute, and I've had MRI scans which showed inflammation and in consultant's words "brain circulation could be better". No idea what that means, but we all have problems, just have to get on with life as best we can. Waiting for result of 2nd and appointment.
Thank goodness I like jigsaws!
Willow that's good you don't have to wait long. I have had 3, you'll be fine.

Thanks Joane. Hope you are doing well now.

Wyllow hope your conversation with your son goes ok.
Glad you’ve got your appointment. I hope the lady from Quakers or your sister will go with you.
HVDY glad your DH has agreed to a check up. Sorry you’re fed up. Are you worried about your family?
loopylou I’m glad your dog is ok. Pets are such a part of the family.
Sweetpeasue hope you have a good day.
Scaredycat thinking of you x
nadateturbe you sound pretty exhausted. Hope you are doing ok. You too Whiff

Black Dog has been a supportive thread for many and in particular it helped me tremendously a few years ago when I was struggling with my daughter's MH. Annie was there for me, here on the thread, and personally and helped me when I just couldn't even go out shopping. I have much to be thankful for to the thread and Annie.
Take care all of you, continue being there for each other as you do now it means so much, I know it did for me during the bad times.
With love xx

Look, my dear friends, can we please think hard about "talking about talking about" this thread?

Can we just "be?"

Inevitably, BD's have changed as different people have come and gone. If there are little things current posters might do a bit better, than please say so, yes, but just criticism of "its not what it used to be" without "maybe we could add this"

is I fear already putting some off.

We are here to "Be", share, comfort, listen, not to do analysis of thread comparisons with the past?

I intend to just carry on, having listened to what people have said and be open , but more thread navel gazing can only damage us I fear.

Annie has been on Black Dog since the beginning and if anyone ‘owned a thread’ then she would much as Soop’s kitchen is very much her thread.

Annie has helped countless people over the years and you only need to look at the two threads to her recently to see how loved she is by many on GN including me.
Yes Annie does refer to people as ‘my love’ but in a caring way and never meant to be patronising.

Threads do change and evolve as those who post on them take them in different directions but Annie has helped many over 14 Black Dog threads and I know the thread means a great deal to her. I for one, have a great deal to thank her for.

I reiterate, all are welcome to post here and hopefully all will be welcomed with kindness and support.

I read too now and again but don't post due to short energy.
Annie's "my love" sounds very caring and sympathetic.
I know you all care and support each other very much, and that is good and much needed.
I don't read all posts so I can't really comment on Annie's last post.
But I'm sure she thought long and hard before saying what she did, and only meant to be helpful.

Annie often calls people ‘my love’. I always found it comforting, never patronising.

Although I rarely post, I frequently read this thread and I find it much more supportive and friendly than ones from a year ago. I left GN for a while after posting on BD and receiving some very patronising responses (not least of which was frequently bring called ‘my love’, which irked me no end. Sometimes people think they ‘own’ a thread.

Yes, on Sunday, sooner than expected, and was transferred to a nurse on my request and will get a call back regarding sedatives by a Doc (I'm already taking the one they give as sedative, so thats not a lot of use.

10 stars today for NHS. Good when it works out. Thinking of Mr SP for tomorrow Sweetpeasue hoping things are OK today.

Thinking of you all and Ellie Anne too as regards church and the very upsetting lady, ow did it go.

Oh *Wyllow Forgot to say - - Hope you get that important medical appt.

Loopyloo Glad your little dog is alright. Our beloved pets are so important to us.

It's a bright, sunny but frosty morning, but I'm utterly fed-up.

Hope all BDers manage to have a decent day x

Morning Whiff Hope you are well this morning.
Loopyloo Oh Im so pleased your little dog is ok. That must have been so frightening.
Wyllow I woke too v early. As I look out of the window now the sky is deep orange. The catastrophising I well understand.
Take care today.
Hope everyone is ok. Thinking of you all.

It has changed. I read but don’t post now.

erm...won't happen not will happen. Brain in gear, Wyllow, brain in gear.

Phew Loopyloo glad to hear of the survival of your clearly much loved companion.

Woke at stupid hour quite unnecessarily cos of having to ring at 8.30. One of my "things" is I often believe good/needed things will happen until they actually do. Catastrophising as per CBT definition. Did see the sunrise though.

Oh I like it when the day comes! Bring on longer and longer days.

I know I read the thread but don't see why Annie and Joce think it's lost its way . All I can see is people opening their hearts to others and giving nothing but help, support,advice and most importantly lasting friendship.

A safe place to come and write about how they are feeling and what's going on in their lives.

It must but Annie and Joce who have changed as I can't see where this thread has. It's needed as much now as when it was first started as far as I am concerned . And long may it continue. 🌹

If the people using this thread are finding it useful and helpful of course it should continue.
It's very easy to think oh it's my fault.
A trap I fall into, often.
I think some people find a loss of control very difficult to deal with.
People have so many difficulties in life especially these days. It's good to be able to support each other.
My little dog managed to eat lots of vitamin treats and I was so worried about him. And it would have been my fault if he died
Seems to be OK though.
But it did my mood and bp no good.
My Dd who is on nights is going back to sleep at her DHs today. So can do noisy things like shredding today!

Just some thoughts.
A lot of people looking for just 'chat' wouldnt come onto a thread labelled Blackdog(at least most wouldnt)
If 'chat' enters into it, which surely it must, depressed people need some relief/release support/light.
People who are desperately sad, within, often come across as 'ok' on the surface. No one ever knows another's problems, especially on an open social network like this.
A lot of people will be desperate and wouldnt come here otherwise;I know I was, and I'm still getting great support here.
Nothing stays still in life. Things evolve, threads will too. There are people here with MH issues.They should be trusted on 'face value'. How else can a thread like this be monitored? Who is saying the posters here have not MH issues and on what grounds?

SweetpeaSue and Doodle Thanks. I'm disappointed about the things Joce and Annie have said.
Doodle He's got a GP appointment on Friday.

Off to bed x

I need to ring my son to chat, I'm always worried about upsetting them, they have so much on their plate with very disabled daughter, but my old habits of withdrawing into myself were not good. I think this is the first place I''ve felt able to be honest.

I have to ring first thing tomorrow to get the colonoscopy appointment, that will give me a starting point to engage. I'm underplaying cancer worries with them, maybe I just dont believe its realistic as there are so many bowel conditions that are "a mystery".

Scaredycat I hope you are getting through the weekend ok. I know the next few days will be hard. Hope the outcome offers you some relief,

HVDY you must be a good care giver. You read so much about people being lonely. I bet they enjoy your visits.
Your DH doesn’t sound too good. Can you get him back to the GP for a check up.
Joce threads become what they are by the people who post on it. I’m really sorry you’re not comfortable with it but I do wish you well. Take care.

HVDY I so look forward to your refreshing posts. I think it could be said that mine are quite depressing at times. I could be far worse if I was completely honest about it. But we must be able to be honest at times too. We are all different personalities with different anxieties and, yes, problems with MH. It's a great shame that vulnerable people who come here for support are criticised. I wish I understood why. Take care all.