Living with someone with mental health issues

Anniebach

No one chooses a mental illness, Hithere you judge harshly.

No- but some choose not to do anything about it and totally refuse to get help- and expect their spouse and children to pay the price.

In some cases, it amounts to a huge amount or cohercive control.

No one should be an emotional punchbag for another's pain

Help is there and taking it is a choice

Yes, indeed. Just saying 'my behaviour is not at all my responsibility because of MH- is just not on.

Very interesting article here:

www.thehotline.org/resources/abuse-and-mental-illness-is-there-a-connection/

Now do realise that someone with Alzheimers present a totally different profile- it's important to say that cohercive control and even violence, cannot ever be excused.

Many who use this as a tool, as described in the article above- make VERY sure they do NOT present such behaviour in the presence ot others- making the spouse, parent or even children- be made to feel even more isolated as others do not believe them.

Allsorts I am sorry to read your post. It must be very difficult for you. I have been there. There is nothing more wearing than having to deal with this day in day out.
Try to seek help from the GP, who could put you in touch with other agencies that could offer respite.
You deserve a peaceful and quiet life, I do hope you can find ways to achieve this.
With love

Allsorts I hope you are ok?
You posted very early this morning.
You dont have to repost if you dont want to.

Allsorts, apologies, I don’t know the relationship you have with the person with a personality disorder, nor do I know what kind of P D is involved. Is there a diagnosis? Is the individual cooperating with mh services

I understand if you don’t want to answer these questions. I want to say I know how tough it is, to try and support someone you have loved, who turns on you. Emotional rollercoaster is right, it’s awful and the support person can be ground down. Try to look after yourself

Fleurpepper, I agree with your comments
PD comes in many guises, very difficult for loved ones to live with without becoming depressed or anxious.

My husband was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia three years into our marriage and the month after I became pregnant. I stayed caring for him for 22 years bringing up my child virtually as a single mother. I left after 22 years when I was on the verge of a breakdown from years of stress.

Life became wonderful for me and my then 19 year old child. It took a long time to overcome my guilt at leaving.

Thank you everyone, I don’t live with the person but am very close, when he’s coping it fine, but it changes in a flash and it’s so difficult, every two or three weeks you’re put through the emotional ringer, the anger directed at you, you feel like walking away, but you can’t, that lasts about 2/3 weeks ,so it continues. Reading what others cope with who have it 24/7 puts me to shame, you’re wonderful coping.
No one chooses a mental illness but it’s hard for those around them too.
Cool Gran, glad you plucked up the courage to make a new life. I hope you don’t feel guilt anymore, you did for 22 years what most of us couldn’t.💐