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Hypoactive Delerium

(52 Posts)
Katyj Tue 28-May-24 05:33:37

Hi ladies. Mum aged 92 in a care home since last December suddenly deteriorated on Saturday. She became very confused and unfortunately fell and cut her head.
She was taken to hospital had a CT scan and blood tests. There doesn’t appear to be anything amiss medically. I spoke with the Dr Saturday afternoon, and we decided that she would be better in the care home rather than hospital.
She hasn’t really woken up since Saturday and hasn’t had any food or drink. The GP will be visiting her today.
Anyone else had this to deal with ? I’d never heard of it before now.

Katyj Tue 28-May-24 05:50:57

Delirium

loopyloo Tue 28-May-24 06:36:53

This lady sounds very poorly and I hope she is kept comfortable at the care home.
My thoughts are with you.

Calendargirl Tue 28-May-24 06:41:48

At 92, your mum has reached a good age.

I think you must be prepared for anything, not easy, I know.

Oopsadaisy1 Tue 28-May-24 08:52:17

If she hasn’t really woken up since the weekend or had anything to drink, I don’t think that she will be well enough to be sent out of hospital. I doubt that they will give her fluids intravenously. I’m so sorry, but I hope she recovers.

Shelflife Tue 28-May-24 09:11:56

Poor lady and poor you. A very distressing time, not much I can say to comfort you but my thoughts are with you . 💐

Katyj Tue 28-May-24 10:05:06

Thank you. I went to visit her early this morning as the carer said she had opened her eyes. She was fast asleep again, she hasn’t drank or been awake since Saturday.
The hospital Dr has put her on end of life care. Hoping she goes quickly without pain bless her ❤️

nanna8 Tue 28-May-24 10:08:50

That is hard for you Katyj Hope she has a peaceful and gentle end of life. No matter how old they are,when our loved ones get to the end it is distressing and heartbreaking.

Calipso Tue 28-May-24 10:15:29

Katyj thank you for updating your post & it sounds as though your Mum is just slowly letting go at the end of a long life. We have so little experience of what natural death is like, so often it's portrayed as full of drama. It sounds as though she is being cared for very well. One thing you may want to think about is that it can take a surprisingly long time so don't forget to take good care of yourself too. flowers

nanaK54 Tue 28-May-24 10:17:18

Sending kindest thoughts to you and your dear mum flowers

Aveline Tue 28-May-24 10:23:14

Thinking of you. A peaceful slipping away by the sound of it. flowers

maddyone Tue 28-May-24 10:23:52

It’s hard to cope with but you must prepare yourself for anything now. She could gradually recover, or not. Spend as much time as you can with her now and hold her hand and talk to her. She will hear you.

Katyj Tue 28-May-24 10:44:42

Thank you for the lovely support. The care home manager was telling me this morning they had one lady on end of life care five times ! She didn’t say how old she was.
It’s just a waiting game I suppose. I’m not good at staying for hours at a time so intend to visit again this afternoon then one of my sons will go this evening.

Shelflife Tue 28-May-24 10:47:02

Do take care of yourself. xx

Cossy Tue 28-May-24 10:51:03

Thinking of you and your family ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

Shelflife Tue 28-May-24 10:51:26

My lovely Mum died aged 92, I had been sitting with her all day and through the nights. I was persuaded to go home and rest , I was exhausted so took their advice. Mum ' chose ' to slip away in my absence! If this happens to you please do not feel guilty - it often happens that way. Sending you strength 💐

Summerfly Tue 28-May-24 11:25:25

Such a sad time for you Katyj. Take comfort from knowing that your mum will know that you’re with her.
Sending hugs. 💐

Callistemon21 Tue 28-May-24 11:29:15

Sending kind thoughts Katyj and, if the time has come, hoping your Mum's passing will be gentle and peaceful.
It's what we'd wish for us all.

Shelflife I think that happens often.

M0nica Tue 28-May-24 11:31:33

Sheflife, I think sometimes people do choose to die when their relatives are not there.

My DF was in hospital and they had alerted us that they though the end was near. My sister and I sat with him for 5 hours and then nipped out to the hospital cafe, which was opposite the ward door, for a quick cup of coffee.

When we got back, he had died. The nurses told us that this happened with with a ot of people. They held on while the faily was there, but when they left just relaxed and slipped away.

Katyj This a very sad time for you, but it seems that your mother is being cared for gently and thoughtfully, and what more could one ask for. but this cannot help but be a sad and difficult time for you.

dragonfly46 Tue 28-May-24 11:32:23

Yes I know of a number of people who waited until they were alone to die. One of them actually said she couldn't die with everyone around her.
Sending hugs Katy.

lucycat2 Tue 28-May-24 14:27:56

Thinking of you.

OurKid1 Tue 28-May-24 14:55:13

Sending thoughts and hugs to you all.

Mandymoo456 Wed 29-May-24 19:15:46

Same with me many years ago my mum was hospitalised, I stayed for days holding her hand and talking to her, I had to get washed and clean clothes on the Saturday so popped back home and that's when she slipped away, I loved her so much, this was 44 years ago

AskAlice Wed 29-May-24 19:25:04

This happened with my Dad just three months after he went into a care home. What helped me and my siblings was that he was safe, warm, was made as comfortable as possible and was not distressed. The care home staff were very good and looked after him and us. We were very fortunate (it was what we wanted) to be with him when he died and he knew right to the end that we were all there.

You are in my thoughts.

Katyj Wed 29-May-24 19:28:50

Mandymoo456 This happens so often doesn’t it, it makes you wonder. Mum and I left my dad about 8pm we were expecting him to live another couple of days, we had a call at 1am to say he’d died.
We can only assume it’s what they wanted. My mum is hanging on bless her four days today, she’s only had the tiniest sips of water and she’s actually been able to hug us today and mouth some words, before falling back to sleep again. It’s all a mystery.