Should we all have the right to a same sex carer?

Casdon

18% of carers are male. 11% of registered nurses are male.

A male doctor examining a female needs a chaperone but a male carer performing intimate care on a female can do so alone. Make it make sense.

Given the figures you've quoted above Casdon you would think there should never be an absolute need for a male carer to be the only available care for a female.

I think so, it's a dignity issue and I'm sure many men would feel the same.

I have also noticed when I've had an occasional appointment with a male doctor for a couple of different issues in the past few years, there has been a female in attendance.

OldFrill

I never experienced a man who objected to a female doing personal care, although some objected to a male carer and many preferred a female carer.

It happens very regularly on wards, but it’s impossible to provide 24 hour male nursing care. We assume men aren’t bothered, because it’s the way care and nursing are structured. Many of them though - they don’t get asked. I find it very sad, but there are also many people, particularly older people, who strongly object to people with a different skin colour looking after them. in an ideal world, everybody would have a choice of carer or nurse, but we aren’t in an ideal world, we’re in a situation where the choice is unfortunately take what is available or receive no care, particularly in the community.

I think it also depends on the attitudes and attributes of the individual carer. My 102 year old friend was recently in hospital. She mentioned a female nurse who she was sure didn’t like her and went so far as to say she’d felt frightened of this nurse who’d spoken sharply to her a few times. However she also praised the male nurse who took care of her so gently and kindly. Although 102 this lady is very sharp and astute mentally, just very frail physically.

I think people should have the choice, getting older appears to lead to loss of self worth sometimes and fewer choices.

I would certainly not want a male carer helping me to take a shower.
Last year, I had surgery which left me extremely immobile but whilst in hospital I was not offered a commode or a bedpan and had to physically get out of bed to go to the toilet. Due to the anaesthetic I was having to drink a great deal of water and I was also cannulated and was having fluids IV. Hence, I was peeing a great deal.
During the night I was always attended by a male HCA who escorted me to the toilet but when I get to the point of dropping my knickers to get on the loo I told him very firmly "you can leave me to it, I will call you when I am done".
I honestly felt that he would have stood and watched me having a pee.........where is the dignity in that??

Definitely.

Intimate medical examinations are not conducted by a single person of the opposite sex and intimate care should be the same.

Slightly off track, I thought I was quite liberal in my views and when aSpa asked if I was ok with a male masseur I blithely said yes. He was professional and did absolutely nothing that could be thought inappropriate but I hated it, especially towards the top of my legs and arms and around my back towards the sides. On alert you might say.

I wasn’t old and vulnerable, people were in the corridor and just next door, he was just doing his job. But the unjustified but nevertheless very real feeling of threat and the possibility of abuse has stayed with me for years.

I think your friends mother was very very sensible.

Casdon

The question was not phrased in a way that referred only to women having the right to a same sex carer. Dignity issues are equally important to men, but people seem prepared to brush that aside.

That’s absolutely true, but it’s up to men to campaign for more male carers so that they can have a choice.
Every time I’ve had a male doctor in or out of hospital there has been a female in attendance.

What is the reason for that do you suppose?

DH in hospital recently was cared for by females, one ant a time even for an catheter and was quite happy with that.

I never experienced a man who objected to a female doing personal care, although some objected to a male carer and many preferred a female carer.

I would think that most women and men would prefer someone of their own sex for personal care and they should be able to have their preferred choice of possible.

Yes we did too, Shinmae, ( I ran a care home for children and young adults) but it wont always be the case.

A tricky one this one. I, personally, would not mind. After all, women have always accepted being treated by male doctors.

On the other hand, I don't feel it is right that women and men should have no choice in the matter and not be consulted about the sex of their carer.

18% of carers are male. 11% of registered nurses are male.

When my mother went into care she was asked about this and she said only a female carer for personal care. This was respected and I think that’s exactly how it should be. There were male carers in the home who could provide personal care for the (far fewer) male residents.

The same when she was at home. She specified female carers, and only female carers came.

Galaxy

Yes of course.
It is not so easy for men to have a same sex carer because of the predominance of females in care. The risks are obviously less though.

We have enough male carers in our home to facilitate if that is their wish…

The question was not phrased in a way that referred only to women having the right to a same sex carer. Dignity issues are equally important to men, but people seem prepared to brush that aside.

Yes of course.
It is not so easy for men to have a same sex carer because of the predominance of females in care. The risks are obviously less though.

No, I don’t think it’s possible. Who would look after all the ill men who needed care?

Simple answer, yes, we should have that right.

I work in Care and have done for nearly 20 years now
In our care home, the residents can say if they prefer a female only for personal care
Personally, I would not want a male giving me personal care