BLACK DOG 25

Hi everyone
Wyllow it was great that you went out. Being outside always lifts my mood.
Scardeycat the cats are a tabby and ginger they are so cute and friendly, they love cuddles. The ginger one is like a big fluffy cushion. We had them from kittens, they’re brother and sister. Fun but they caused a lot of damage to leather chairs etc! And still scratch them even though we’ve had them for around 10 years.
HVDY Our daughter loves playing her guitar and music, I got her a new guitar and she got some money as well from family. She likes make up and toiletries too. Your garden sounds lovely. My DH used to love gardening.
Ellie Anne hope you’re feeling a little bit better today. Thinking of you.
Doodle thinking of you, every day is a struggle isn’t it. Glad you have your friends and family.
It’s good to talk to others who understand isn’t it.
Sweetpea Sue don’t feel bad you are helping me just giving me someone to talk to. The chats takes my mind off things.
Lucyd glad your house is coming on. Least you can see it moving forward.
Thank you all for your lovely words and advice, feel a bit better today, I slept better too.
Best wishes to you all. Xx

Elveral I ant imagine how hard it is for you coping with your own grief and caring for your daughters and their wellbeing too. You’re doing an amazing job. They’re lucky to have you.
Lucyd thank you. Yes I have found too that the run up can be worse than the day itself. Sounds as though your build is coming along, bet you can’t wait
Ellie Anne my SILs daughter who is a very clever woman in her 40s only contacts her mother occasionally. There is no problem between them but she will only contact her mum when she feels like it or if she remembers to do so. .
I cannot imagine a marriage like yours nor what a strain it is for you to carry on day after day.
Wyllow great news another walk today. Carer tomorrow. Does that mean another walk? I hope so.
HVDY it’s sketching this week and tonal work not painting. Drawing a vase of flowers I think.
Glad you had a good day and enjoyed the aqua aerobics.
Scaredycatyes church today although my friend and I were both sitting there quietly with tears running down our cheeks. Her husband died 6 years ago last week and it’s an emotional time for us both. I love church though. This afternoon we went to the hospice for lunch which was nice.
Do you think the cats on your bird table think if they sit there long enough they’ll get dinner.?
Sweetpeasue you’ve got a lot of troubles of your own. Nothing you say is trite we all know you care as we do for you. This problem with your DH’s health is weighing heavily in you. Xx

I'm so sorry all - I've no energy to post much
I've tried finding words and deleted them as they seemed so trite.
Wish I knew what to say to everyone who are so terribly sad .
Wyllow It's true that when we say it how it is it helps others to know they can offload their own troubles. We are all only human.
Having upset gut at present and very tired. Just wanted to say how much this place means to be able to know we are heard and hear each other.
Wishing all a peaceful night.x

Hi all
Doodle- Oh those dreams that stick with you are awful. They seem so real even after you,ve woken up. So sorry it coloured your day and hope today has been better. It’s Church isn’t it?
Yes that’s DD cake - she’s a good baker but detests cooking. MyGD1 and GGD love baking too. GGD won a little baking contest the other day.
I,m glad your family meal went well. It’s the contrast between the quiet of home after being all together that can be upsetting afterwards . You are never a moaning Minnie but someone who is sad and at this moment particularly is reminded of this time last year. Sending a hug.
Elveral- I,m glad DD enjoyed her birthday meal. You did well as it’s not easy for you when you see the other families. Although I expect some will have their own troubles too.
You must have missed your Easter break very much but have made the girls a lovely time . Not easy combining work and motherhood is it. I think you are doing marvellously coping with all the emotional ups and downs.
The cats are local visitors- we hope to adopt 2 later in the year as we,ve never been so long without a cat before. What sort of cats do you have?
Lucyd- nice to see you . Kind understanding words for EllieAnne and Doodle.
No our Bird table is a bit lacking in birds! ! No idea why the local cats love it so much.
Your new home is coming on now by the sound of it - so many things for you to do and plan. Have they given you a possible moving in month?
EllieAnne- you sound so unhappy. Is it at all possible to visit your DD or do you fear rejection if you went. Yes she is 40 but age is irrelevant if she is mentally unwell .
You bear everything on your own- can you ever talk to your husband about your feelings . I feel so sorry for your situation.
Wyllow- you had a walk in the park- so good to hear that. Is there a cafe there so you could stop for a coffee break and then go a bit further?
Hope today’s session with your carer was a companiable time - it must be so good for you to be able to talk to somebody who you feel so comfortable with.
HVDY- aren’t those cats lovely- wish they were ours but honoured they like to visit.
You’re right the bees are so important. They are very interesting to watch too. I like the buzzy sound of them.
DD has always liked baking but detests cooking with a vengeance.
I had forgotten that your DB lost his Son a year ago he must miss him very much. Hope SiL is getting on OK.
You bought lovely plants- I love Fuschias . Hope you,ve had a nice lazy day after your busy one yesterday.

Love to all .

I'd somehow lost a long post I'd typed yesterday. Anyway -

EllieAnne Your daughter knows you care, but feels unable to talk. I've been like that myself, at times. Age has nothing to do with it. My brother (78) often turns his mobile off because he doesn't want to hear from anyone. Try not to take it personally, but enjoy your nice relationship with your son and his wife. I'm sorry you're so unhappy.

ScaredyCat What great photos! I love the cats on the bird table . A bridge for the bees is a kind thing to do. Bees are very important. The cake looks beautiful. Does your DD do a lot of baking? I bought a Fuschia, Lobelias, Marigolds, Begonias, Pinks, and a couple of other shrubs.

Doodle Glad you enjoyed the family meal. It must be difficult but you're doing very well. What will you be doing at the art class - any particular topic?

Wyllow3 Glad you got some shopping the other day. What's your favourite meal? How's the tum? Might you go for a walk this week?

Elvera1 I'm glad your daughter's meal out went ok. It must be so hard to keep things as normal as possible for your girls, and you're doing a great job. The dreams are part of the grief, I think - my brother dreams about his son, who died a year ago. I hope you can find some comfort from them, somehow. Did your daughter get something she wanted? Most teenagers like clothes and toiletries, don't they. My eldest GD is 14 and has got more skincare stuff than I have.

LucyD You understand how Elvera1 and Doodle feel. I'm very lucky to still have my husband and can only imagine the awful grief you all experience. Your house is beginning to take shape - how exciting!

It was a good day yesterday - aqua aerobics then brunch. Put new plants in pots (need to buy more), chest CT, straight in and out in 10 minutes, then dinner at the pub. Lazy day today. Love to ALL BDers x

I’ve enjoyed catching up with todays posts and appreciate kind words and thoughts, always read all carefully, and suggestions, I haven’t the oomph to post much except to say to was sunny and did get to the park on my own for a walk. Carer tomorrow.

Warmest thoughts for BD’s whose todays very difficult times . But no need to apologise if you’v said something down or difficult - it helps to understand others sorrows and struggles - not alone. Some very wise words.

Night night see you tomorrow BD’s, posting or just reading.

Thank you for the kind comment s.
I know her mental health is not good just now and I don’t expect much but I am very hurt. She is her forties so not a young girl.
Reading about the heart break some of you have suffered at the loss of your husbands and the worry and concern some have about their husbands health has brought home to me how empty and abnormal this marriage is.

Evening everyone. First time in a wee while I have had time to catch up but I do think of of you all every day.
Been very busy at work over the holidays and caravan site very busy too. Still very quiet where I am though situated. Most have gone now.
Ellie Anne - I am sorry to hear that you haven't had contact with your daughter for a while. I know this must be so distressing for you. No matter how much you puzzle over it you can never work out exactly what she is thinking or why. I have two sons and I am lucky if I hear from my older boy once a year. We have never had cross words but he is just emotionally detached and cannot show his love. His brother is the total opposite. It doesn't mean he doesn't love me.
Doodle - anniversaries are hard especially first ones. I so dreaded birthdays, Christmas, wedding anniversary, etc but, and I know I may be the exception here, I found the actual run up to the day itself far worse than the day itself. The day was just a feeling of numbness like the day of my husband's funeral when I was so busy making sure my Dad and sons were okay that I didn't really process the enormity of what was going on - think I was still in a state of shock. You will always miss your lovely husband and that is because you love him. That's the price we have to pay. There are still times when I feel grief stricken (I am crying now) but I have times of joy which I never thought I would ever feel again. When I am feeling really grim (as I wascin the dark, cold days of winter) I just kept reminding myself "this shall pass" and it did.
Scaredycat - do any birds dare visit your bird table??? Stunning cats and gorgeous cat ( making me feel very peckish). Maybe I will finally master the art of baking when my new house is built and I have my new shiny new kitchen! Foundations for the sitting room and spare bedrooms went in this week and the kitchen was ordered two weeks ago. Still feels a long way off though...
Sweetpeasue - I hope you are having a good break at the Lakes. 6 hours of music? I think that would have driven me demented even if it had been music I had enjoyed.
Better go now as working again tomorrow and need to get things done before then. Hope everyone has a peaceful night. Xx

Ellie Ann when I was younger I could sometimes go for weeks without contacting my Mum, I just didn’t think, it wasn’t till years after I realised what it must of been like for her. Maybe that’s what it’s like for your DD, she doesn’t think? Xx

Hello everyone
Thanks for your lovely comments and kind wishes, they’re appreciated. DD enjoyed her meal, the place was busy, lots of families laughing together 🥲 I didn’t let her see how upset I was feeling.
The girls don’t go back to school till tomorrow here.
It’s been hard work, working, I’ve had some time off at home too, and trying to keep them busy (to get them out of their bedrooms!) without another adult at home. It’s the first school holiday we’ve been at home for this long, we always used to go away at Easter. It feels strange.
I haven’t been sleeping well, keep waking up really early. Then can’t back to sleep. Today we’ve been out so youngest DD could spend her birthday money. Walked quite a lot so hopefully that will help. Got a busy few days ahead.
Last night I didn’t sleep hardly at all, I had a dream about DH, we were cooking together at home like we always used to, we were happy and laughing, and
which ended with music playing I will always love you. Made me feel really strange when I woke up. Really out of sorts.
I’m taking it as a sign from him and trying to find comfort in it. Sorry to go on.
I love the cat pictures Scardeycat, we have two cats and they’re really funny, and lovable.
Sending best wishes to you all, and strength to those who are struggling. Xx

Sweetpeasue I don’t think you’ll rest until your Dh has seen a heart specialist. Maybe your visit to the lakes will be fine if your DH doesn’t do too much.
What a lovely time your aunt must have when you visit. Glad you made her laugh.
Our son’s meal went very well thank you. It was really nice to be together. O was ok last night but had a really awful dream which upset me so much it’s been haunting me today and I’ve felt very down all day.
HVDY sorry you’ve had a rainy day today. We’ve had sunshine all day. Went for a walk to the park to see our tree and then to a talk in the community centre but it wasn’t very interesting.
900 DVDs is some collection. That’s amazing.
Ellie Anne I have great sympathy for how you are feeling. It’s nice you have a DIL you can talk too. I’m sorry you’re so worried about your DD. I know others who have little contact with their children who feel the same. It’s hard when they don’t keep in touch. Take heart from what Wyllow said about not keeping in touch with her mum but still loving her. You never really know what’s going on in someone else’s mind.
Wyllow I’m glad you got a good choice of meals, Do you try and look forward to your dinner in the evening? I do think getting out and walking more would help and I need to do the same myself.
Scaredycat those cats look lovely and that chocolate cake really scrumptious. Is that the one your DD made?
Hope you had a nice time too.
We had a lovely meal last night. I did miss Dh so much but we talked about him and I know they all love him so much. As so often happens after a good time I’ve been really flat today. Back to church and art this week so hope that will cheer me up.
Sorry I’m a right moaning minnie today. I’m just not right and I can’t quite get my head in the right place. Hopefully I’ll be better tomorrow.

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Cats and cakes!!

Hi all
Doodle- so glad you enjoyed your day with DS1 and hope yesterday’s celebrations were mainly happy ones. 50 is a big milestone in our lives isn’t it. I really believe your DH was there in spirit- you all loved him so much.
I felt sad that Pope Francis had died yesterday . It was wonderful that he gave his final address on Easter Sunday- what a kind, human being he was.
Will be thinking a lot about you these next few weeks - sending love.
SweetPeaSue- what a lovely scent Sweet Peas are if only for such a short time. Beautiful colours too.
What a sweet lady your Aunt sounds- I loved my one and only Auntie too.
Our dining table is very old now and so many dear people have sat round it over the years- so many memories both sad and happy.
Good news re the blood test so try not to speculate and worry yourself so much . Hopefully you will be in the Lakes and let the beauty and peace there do you both good. Wastewater is my favourite lake- do you have one.
HVDY- thank you - what a relief the dinner was ok. !
Yes it’s really funny to see the cats in the house. As for the bees yes occasionally they do drown but they do help each other out and we fish them out too. I made a bee bridge with a stick so they could hang on to,that if they fell in!!
Did you get plants with your shopping or a garden centre?
I love doing pot planting- what did you get?
EllieAnne- it’s so upsetting for you to have no contact with your DD at the moment. But rest assured she needs you very much . As Wyllow said it doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you just that her head isn’t in a good place right now. Glad you could talk to your DiL but it’s not easy getting upset when you’re out is it.
Your husband really got his wires crossed- that must have been the last straw!! I wish I could say something that would help you more.
Wyllow- nice you got a variety of food yesterday- food shopping is tiring though and there is so much choice.
Wish we could unstick you and release some feelings of self worth. Now that the Summer is coming it would be so good for you if you could get out most days. Doesn’t have to be far but gradually increase the distance a bit. Is there anything you would really like to do and could aim for?
Glad the Garden man is coming back - perhaps he could bring some plants for you to pot up by your French doors.
Is it your nice carer tomorrow - if so hope you have an easier day.

Love to all BDs- both posters ,readers and all abovexx

It’s nice to hear about your bird baths and table, HVDY I hope they are well used. And Little girl old enough this year to enjoy the easter egg hunt. What a huge DVD collection!

I’m glad the dinner went well Scaredycat, a real family “do”. Lovely post.

Yes, shopping today, got a different ready meal for each night. I am stuck tho as regards self regard. But very stiff today just tired after shopping, and I really have to at least make myself walk more.

A bitter sweet meal for you tonight, Doodle. I’m glad you are getting out tho. X

Your aunt is getting so much out of you being around for her, Sweetpeasue. You are so good continuing it despite the health worries around,
I’m glad that DH did rest especially after yesterday although it was probably frustrating. I really hope that he is well enough to go to the Lakes. It really does feel as if its a good idea to see a Cardio doctor so you know where things are in that respect,

I’m glad you came in EllieAnne
I had periods when I didnt contact my mum a lot. It didnt mean I didnt love her, …but I really appreciate you would like and need more contact. The time muddle with DS didnt help, did it.

Sorry not been in but am reading your posts.
I’m so upset about dd that I can’t enjoy other things. No contact this weekend.
Was out yesterday with ds1 his wife and child for lunch .It was ok but I spoke to my d in l about dd and broke down. It looks like she doesn’t want a mother any more.

I’d told dh that we were meeting ds for lunch and when I got home from church he was eating lunch. Thought we were going out for tea!
Everything is a mess.
Going to bed. It’s the only place that’s my own.
Sorry for a sad post.

ScaredyCat Well done with all the cooking. Lovely that your daughter made the cake for Easter (chocolate cake is the best kind). How funny that cats like to be on your bird table , but don't bees drown in the bird bath?

Doodle Hope this evening's birthday celebrations are nice. I expect you'll all feel sad that Dad isn't there, but I hope you'll have some happy memories too.

SweetpeaSue Yes, 900 DVDs is a huge collection. He had them on shelves in the alcoves when he lived here - all in alphabetical order. Your husband has been doing such a lot recently. I'm glad he rested today. Your neighbours played music for SIX hours?? I'd have complained long before then. Will they be back at work tomorrow? Saturday is a way off, so your husband will probably be ok by then - if he doesn't do anything much all week. As for the HF tests, I expect the hospital will do them in order, and spirometry is just one test. I've been waiting since early Feb for a spirometry test, and will have that at the end of May. Has your DH had a chest x-ray/CT? (sorry if you've said before). HF causes an enlarged heart at a certain stage, and that would show up. I hope you can manage to have a restful night.

It's been a boring day - rained all day long but we got some shopping and bought some plants for tubs in the garden. I fell asleep for an hour. Hope everyone has a good night's sleep. x

Elveral Thankyou for your kind good wishes. My DGD will be 14 next month. They are so eager to be a 'grown-up at that age aren't they. It must be so hard for you all. I hope you have a nice meal together today.
Wyllow Glad you had a better day - you deserve so much happiness and not the way you are having to live right now. I imagine seeing your family with their in- laws must be very bittersweet. Glad they have love and support from them but feeling very much on the outside. You can only assure yourself you are still very much loved by them all.
Yes ,I did grow Sweet-peas last year. They die off by end of summer so start all over again the next Spring. I do love their fragrance though their delicate blooms don't last long after picking. I can smell them from the kitchen as I come down thestairs.
Scaredycat Yes the times out with aunt are so worth the effort. I keep conversation to past times she can remember and talk about funny things that have happened. She giggled till tears came down her cheeks on Saturday!☺️ You're so right about family meals being nostalgic too. Lovely of your DD to contribute with a Chocolate Easter cake.
HVDY Must have been fun seeing Littlegirl on the Easter egg hunt. Hope you took videos. Wow 900 DVDs - your son has a massive collection. My DH has had rest enforced on him today. He did far too much yesterday and I think he's strained something around his hip. It rained here from late afternoon- much cooler.
Doodle Thankyou so much for the hugs. I remember it coming up to the first anniversary of my mum's passing. I had a diary where I kept lots of ' milestones' of her ups and downs and deterioration- the special moments - difficult times and increasing fear and desperation. Not the same , as its your own DH but I can only imagine how dreadfully hard it is. I hope the celebration of your son's 50th goes as well as it can be and you are all round the table with some special and funny memories as well as the sad. You are so kind to everyone here- you have such a big heart. I expect it will be so difficult for you tonight after being with family. Do hope you can sleep tonight and hugs back to you. Thankyou for thinking of us.x

DH did too much yesterday. He's done something to his hip or thereabouts. He's very annoyed as so difficult to get about at all today. I drove out to coffee shop and he took the walking stick he had from having his hip replacements. Music from next door playing for 6 hrs so we went to sit on a bench watching the sea with a flask of coffee. Sky and sea very dark and it rained gently on us though we sat for 25 mins together.

Our weeks holiday in Lakes is on Saturday. It's come at a bad time really if DH can't get about.
I am feeling torn about everything. The results from the blood test were normal. I looked it up about HF and can still get normal results with certain heart conditions. DH has appt for Spirometry test in another 5 weeks but sick of drawn out time . I still firmly believe we'll need to go private with Cardiac Dr - at least we'll know more.

Hoping all are OK and coping with all your concerns , worries and grief. Wishing you all a peaceful night.x

Elveral you’re doing a wonderful job with your two girls. Nice you’re having a meal out for her birthday. Hope you all enjoy it. Nice to hear from you.
Wyllow glad you managed to get some things done yesterday. Of course you’re missing your family and it must be hard seeing them but not being with them. Hopefully things will be better this year and you will be in touch again.
HVDY I bet it’s lovely seeing the birds on your bird table.
Good you got to see little girl. I haven’t got a loft so no one can store things in it, even me.
Thanks Scaredycat I did have a nice time with DS1 yesterday. Tonight we are all going out together to celebrate DS2s 50th. It will be tinged with sadness as Dh came to the same restaurant so many times.
Sweetpeasue I keep thinking on you and your Dh. Hope you’re ok.
Sorry all I’ve got to dash son is on his way to pick me up.

Hi all
Doodle- it’s hard reliving those memories that we would rather not have isn’t it. But you need to face them as you’re doing and one day although the hurt will still be there the love will live on and sustain you.
I hope you had a lovely meal yesterday.Being with family is the most healing thing and sharing the memories together.
I know it doesn’t feel like it now but there will be some happy times ahead- family times and new memories.
SweetPeaSue- you,are so kind to your,Aunt. It’s,sad for you to see her memory fading. But at the moment she can enjoy her days out and you,ll be glad of those memories when she no longer can remember.
Glad you,ve been out in the garden - everything is growing now isn’t it. When I have been worn out with grief it has always helped getting out and doing something in the garden,
Your sadness is so understandable as your DH is going through
Such a difficult time. He comes across as a really stoical person who copes with everything in his own way. Do wish you,get some answers soon.
HVDY- what a lovely colour Jaffa is - one contented moggy.
The dinner went well thank you. DD helped me dish up as that always flummoxes me in case things get cold. She also made a lovely Chocolate Easter cake- much appreciated. I hope you had a lovely roast too. Being round a table with family is so
Nostalgic isn’t it . Remembering all the people who have sat round our table.
Hope you get lots of feathered visitors to your bird table.
Ours gets more visiting cats than birds and the bird baths have been full of bees!!
Glad Little Girl enjoyed her egg hunt. She will remember it when she is older.
Wyllow- so sorry Saturday was one of those difficult days. You are so hard on yourself. I wish you could realise that you are as deserving as everyone to enjoy simple,pleasures. You deserve so much better- please try to be kinder to yourself.
Well done with getting the Sunday chores done. Today is shopping day isn’t it- hope you treated yourself.
HVDY is right- being able to see your family again is a real goal. It’s lovely that they share their days with you on What’s App - wouldn’t it be wonderful to do it in person. Step by little step- each day a couple more- we’re right behind you.
Elveral- so happy to see you. You are doing so well and each day another hurdle overcome. I do hope your DD is enjoying her special day and is pleased with her restaurant choice.
Having your lovely daughters to care for can be hard as sometimes you need someone to care for you too don’t you.
But on the other hand watching them become young women will give you much joy over the coming years.
Take care and so nice to see you back.

Warm thoughts to all BDs - mentioned and those we,ve not seen for a while and those who just read.

SweetpeaSue I hope your DH rests a bit today. With luck, he will get a diagnosis soon. I won't be gardening today; it's raining.

Doodle We've already got 2 bird baths from RSPB. It's a bird table I've ordered, a standard wooden one. DH lowered the roof of the last one so that the greedy pigeons couldn't get to the food. They used to scoff it all. Your very sad memories of this time of year can't be easy. I hope you have company today.

Elveral You are doing so very well to keep life as normal as possible for your girls. I hope the family meal is nice. Are the children back to school on Tuesday? They are here (Nottingham).

Wyllow3 You did the essentials yesterday, so that's good. Yes, it must be difficult not being able to see your family, especially the GDs. That could be a bigger goal for you. Step by step, you could get back to the "old" Wyllow3. Koko.

DS1 and his SS turned up yesterday. They took a lot of computer parts from the loft, as well as his bike - he needs to do something with his 900 DVDs we've got here! I saw Little Girl briefly, at theirs, for her first Easter egg hunt. She loved it . Hope ALL BDers manage to have a decent day x

Thank you for your special greetings for today,**Scaredycat*. I hope the roast meal went well you cooked.

I’ve got to contact the gardener this week to arrange a return visit HVDY. You and DH have had a good garden day.

Good gardening there too, Sweetpeasue. Thank you for my hug. (Didnt you actually grow Sweet peas last year?)

I do remember the time DH went into hospital and the stay Doodle. Hugs as this one year comes around. Very understandable feelings.

Elveral you’re doing so well keeping on keeping on for DD. I didnt get really ill until my snows 20 plus so didnt have to do what you are whilst a mum of younger children.

A bit better today as I did my Sunday things, washed clothes, and had a shower and dressed. Hard to see the Easter family WhatSapps with other grandparents wh they see a lot but things are what they are.

Night night all BD’s coming in, and reading xx

Hello ladies, I’m just popping in to say hello and to send good wishes.
I’m keeping plodding on, getting through every day. I’ve been very busy lately as it’s half term.
It’s our youngest daughter’s birthday tomorrow, she is 14. I can’t believe it.
A family meal at a restaurant of her choosing is planned. I’m trying to stay cheerful for her.
Thinking of you Doodle and everyone else not personally mentioned.
Take care everyone.

Happy Easter to all who read or post on this thread, hope you have a peaceful day. 🙏

HVDY it’s easy to forgive pets if they do something when you love them isn’t it. What sort of bird bath are you having? Is it one in a stand or one you put on the ground? Glad you had a nice day.
Sweetpeasue it’s not a year yet it’s 11 months. DH was in hospital for four weeks. That’s kind of what I am relieving at the moment. Nice of you to think of me though.
Yes you’re right it is most certainly the worst year of my life by a long long way. Sadly there is no end to it until I join him.
I can understand your worry and upset about your Dh. It’s ridiculous he hasn’t had a proper diagnosis yet. No one likes to see their loved ones in pain. It’s awful isn’t it. I do hope you get somewhere soon. Sending hugs.
Wyllow don’t punish yourself for a bad day. Don’t focus on it just start each day afresh. You’ve been doing better recently.
Scaredycat happy Easter to you too 😊🐣🐣🐣🐣🐣

HVDY DH and I have been in the garden too. He mowed the lawn and I did a TINY bit of weeding and tied up some climbers.
Glad Jaffa is enjoying his Al fresco tuna!
Wyllow Please don't give up all hope. So sorry about these 'whats the point ' feelings persisting. Do hope today you've managed the wash . Glad you've the Wattsapps and your family still in touch. Please stop punishing yourself -it's sort of sabotaging your own recovery. You deserve to have some happiness in your life after everything you've been through. A hug for you coming through.x

Happy Easter to all and those who read.