Black Dogs 29

Wyllow Thanks for meditation video.
MH worker gave me some simular ones to help relax when stressed. My hair colour is dark golden blonde ( according to pkt) though mines darker than shade shown. Ive got a real mirror phobia so cant go to hairdressers. I hope youve been OK today.
DH could prob walk quarter of a mile though it hurts him quite a bit.
HVDY Thats such a good idea about your sins gifting like that. Better to have something you both really like than stuff you dont need. Sounds like a good plan you had there for your hair. I know theres a build up of colour on mine. I keep on with same shade as I haven't the courage to change.
How nice to win that raffle .Bet you were so surprised.
Scaredycat Hope you're enjoying your time away.
Doodle Oh I know your friend has been so kind and helpful. Im sure having you with her will help her enjoy the holiday too. I hope it wont be too much of an effort to make ,but hopefully you will find you can take some pleasure in it. Hope it was good at art today.
EllieAnne Hope you can get your husband to at least fold the chairlift up for you. Ooh you must feel so mad.

Love to all and * Nadateturbe* too. X

Thanks Wyllow I’ll give that a try tonight. It is difficult not to have the energy we once had. I used to clean the whole flat in a morning. Now I wash the kitchen floor and have to sit down for half an hour.
HVDY you brother sounds totally depressed or just not interested in life. I can imagine it must be hard for him after his losses but it’s not much fun being miserable every day and not good for the people around you either.
Ooh the Pudding Pantry sounds just the job., do they do puddings there too as well as afternoon tea? Well done on winning the raffle.
Scaredycat hope you are enjoying yourself and relaxing.
Ellie Anne I’m hoping that stair lift hasn’t caused you an injury. Bit selfish of him to go ahead if he doesn’t really need it yet.
Sweetpeasue do you think colouring your hair so much is damaging and making it fall out? Have you ever thought of leaving it it’s natural colour? Alternatively a hair topper or something like. I bet you’re more aware of it than anyone else.
Certainly tell the GP if DH has stated needing the spray again.,hopefully it was just a one off.
Art today. Doing a project over a few weeks than had a leisurely food shop and of course bought lots of stuff I didn’t really need (not food though. I’m trying to cut down)

SweetpeaSue I had several layers of dye on my hair, which is why no hairdresser would agree to strip it (I asked at 5 salons). I'm used to it being white all over now, and am glad not to have the faff of dyeing it. Your colour sounds very nice. Yes, it was good to win something. I love fruit-scented things (I even buy cleaning products that are lemon-fragranced). Did you visit your book club friend?

Doodle The Pudding Pantry serves cakes, puddings, breakfasts and lunches. There are 3 branches in Nottingham. I went with my sister-in-law to one a few weeks ago. I don't know how my brother can bear to keep being alone at home all the time. He said he can't see the point in life (he's been on ADs for a couple of years). He doesn't make friends easily and hasn't kept in touch with people over the years. I've suggested various things to him, but he doesn't bother. What's your art project? What nice/different things did you buy today?

I hope the visit to the book group person goes well, Sweetpeasue....... small beginnings....Now that is *ods Law re the spray for DH.. I hope it continues to be very very occasional. meditation tapes are very individual and sometimes one is just too preoccupied or sad to "tune in", it's just good, when you can.

Another one worth trying is a UK woman, Kim Vincent, nice calm voice

www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8ZYC4yp39k

that might suit Doodle better too.

Dark gold blonde actually sounds very nice. its staying very dark for too long thats risky, my mum did but Docsis had a tactful word.

Ooo, that was a nice haul, HVDY, at the day centre, as well as the food. Gosh, that was pretty brave to take all the dark colour out and condition it just like that.

I have a cleaner Doodle Energy is too precious. Well done on the foodie front. Now, nothing wrong with a bit of shopping therapy. Are you a bit happier with your art project?

Today was a crazy day. I will be flat out tomorrow. Not planned!

Friend Flat-bound P (vv bad RA) was into going out, and knew exactly where she wanted to go, and it was a bit of the High Peak I hadn't been to for some time.

We drove through tiny roads with cathedral like branches and then fab views, and all was alive in the wind. We'd had a lovely time. She is so tiny I'd had to put raiser cushions on the front seat.

But before I had left I had managed to mysteriously lose my key fob. After opening the door and the car.

And I couldn't find the spare front door key. so I had to leave home with the door unlocked (I knew it would be OK, it was........ nevertheless...). Then I went for an hour and a bit at the gym:

tired, I went onto an optician's appointment. New - a new, far better Specsavers, and a superb optician, we took in the lot - bad blepharitis, and all round sight check which had changed within 8 months. Returned, after returning 2 items to different places.

Good, I thought I'll find one of my front door keys quickly and have a siesta

Duh.

No chance. I have turned the house upside down, drawers out, up and under everything. (No its not in the car)...so rung my nephew, who is so busy, but agreed to drop it by later, and the emergency key company, for two new keys..tided the drawers I had upturned....and went to a nice Quaker Zoom.

I predict not a lot for tomorrow. Cleaner, then seeing my CPN, thats it.

Hi all
HVDY- Afternoon tea is the best- what a good idea to ask for a pressie. Love the name of that one though - says it all.
Your visit to the day centre was a good one. Lovely food and winning a bunch of smellies- glad you have that to go to.
Your brother could have such a better life- you do all you can but sometimes people just love to wallow in their misery- so sad.
It’s so much easier letting your hair go natural isn’t it. Yours looks lovely in the photo you put on a little while ago.
EllieAnne- Hope “stairlift wars” isn’t making you too cross. Yours looks lovely DH should use the stairs as long as possible knowing that if he needs the lift it is there.
Doodle- I think the missing energy is the hardest thing to come to terms with as you get older. I push myself all the time but Housework does me in.
What is your Art project- I found it hard to do the same thing for a while - I like to work quickly.
Thank you yes the towns in this part of France are so pretty- full of hydrangeas and agapanthus which I love. Also many old buildings and heavenly beaches.
You are going into your holiday with love and kindness for your friend- I,m sure you will have a lovely time and Norway is so beautiful.
SweetPeaSue- we have the hedge man in the Autumn usually , we used to do it ourselves but I was always scared DH would cut himself instead of the hedge- or fall off the ladder!!
It’s so nice that your DH does your hair. Have you ever tried letting it just be white? It’s so much easier.
What a pity that the spray had to come out It really is Sods Law just after speaking to the nurse. Not being able to walk far must frustrate DH so much.
Yes thank you we are loving it here. It’s so pretty and clean with flowers everywhere. Not to mention the beaches which are truly beautiful.
Wyllow- yes I love sea food but not the snotty look of Oysters. Sometimes I think people eat them just to say they do
I hope after speaking to the Safeguarding Big Cheese that your head will feel clearer. I understand wanting things tied up neatly but that’s not always possible sorry not to dwell on MrA
- he,ll get over it as you,ve had to all these months. I know what you mean about preferring to know all the facts for reassurance but sometimes I wish I hadn’t asked!! Let sleeping dogs and MrA lay.
What a day you had yesterday . But you dealt with it calmly and coolly . Your little friend must have had a lovely time.
Hope today is not so frantic- chats with your lovely cleaner and then the CPN visit. Take care and rest when you feel the need
Nadateturbe - thinking of you.
Purple Pixie - how’s life treating you?

Love to all mentioned and notxxxxxxx

EllieAnne don’t know how another yours looks lovely crept into your reply!!😩

So after a really horrible week I’ve been made to feel rubbish today about something that happened in church and I expressed an opinion. Wish I hadn’t now and will be keeping quiet in future.

The weather is just right temperature wise at the moment, and I hope it is with you too Scaredycat. I hope you can manage some little beach walks for the air and the swish of waves. I saw some truly breathtaking beaches when I hitch hiked round Brittany in 1970. What been your best foodie experience so far? Do you feel OK being away now?

Dear EllieAnne what did you say to get put down? I can’t imagine it - please do share if you feel able we may be able to put your mind more at rest? xxxx.

Nice chat with N cleaner/friend, having a hard time as her MiL has sudden terminal cancer and she is “being the strong one”. But she will talk to me. Then at the park it was so good talking to one of my CPN’s and letting off steam. She was great. And kind.

Got food in..
…then realised that because first thing this morning I had managed to work out that my keys had dropped in the bag of charity clothes I put out. And rung the charity, based in London, and stupidly gave them my address. And if they find my keys……
Cue phone calls this afternoon to the AA who can get me on my fob insurance a reprogrammed car key and pay for the house key - but of course I will have to have a new key fitted not more old ones.

Back later to catch up on any more today BD’s xxx

Hard to explain but it was a man that put me down.

HVDY sorry nothing exciting just stocking up on stuff. Some nice hand wash and tea towels.
I too can’t understand how your brother can bear to be alone so much. Not surprising he’s depressed. Yet he turns down offers to be with you for meals etc. Very sad for him.
Wyllow thank you. I think art project will take some time. I’m going slowly. So sorry you lost your keys. That so annoying. Hope you get them replaced soon.
Good you had a nice chat with your CPN.
Scaredycat it sounds lovely where you are I hope you are relaxing and enjoying yourself. Yes Norway is lovely but DH and I have vern there so many wonderful times it will be had doing it without him.
Art project is umbrellas in the rain.
Ellie Anne your opinion is as valid as anyone else’s. No one should put you down especially in church. That not right.
Please don’t be put off by that man. You have a right to a say as well. Sorry you’ve had such a horrible week.
Sweetpeasue that colour sounds lovely. My hair is brown. You’re m right my friend has been so good and kind to me I will try hard to make sure she enjoys the holiday.
I’ve got a bit of a headache. Been driving a lot today and in the sun. Went to the hospital and my dressing has been removed. Wrist healing well. Went to hospice for lunch which was nice. Then popped over to visit son and family before they go on holiday.

Wyllow Oh what a worry for you about your keys. Hope you got one back from your nephew. We( DH) once lost car keys after we'd packed up to leave a holiday cottage. After unpacking suitcases and food box, searching high and low ( took hrs!) finally found them hanging on a clothes dryer where they'd slipped out of DHs pocket.
Good you had nice day with cleaner friend and CPN worker.
HVDY Yes, visited book club friend and it was so nice. She showed me around her very interesting home and we had good chat . She worked many years as a nurse. She lost her DH a year ago.
You must get so frustrated with your DB when you know hed feel better trying to get out and see people. You do your very best.
EllieAnne Like Doodle ,church is the last place you should be being put down and its not right. I hope you can see that the man who did that was very wrong and it doesnt discourage you from sharing. You have as much right as everyone else to give your opinion - what a silly man.
Scaredycat Im glad you're having a good holiday. It all sounds so interesting and I hope youve settled in by now. Trouble is ,usually just as you're enjoying it the week has passed.
We usually cut the hedge around March time as I know that birds start to nest in the spring but DH couldn't manage it this time.
Doodle Im sure once you're away youll start to feel better and its so good you and your friend get on so well. I expect she will know that it will be difficult for you at times, remembering past ones. I really hope you enjoy it .Hope your headache is clearing - driving and the sun are probably the culprits but hope its cooler now where you are. So glad your wrist is healing. It'll feel good to have the dressing off.
I have alopecia androgenic, big mouthful but I inherited my dad's gene - he went bald v early ,though females usually just get thinner and sparse on the top and front. My youngest son has lost most of his hair and hes just 46.

Supposed to be meeting up with my 2 sisters and their husband's tomorrow for lunch. My DH has had so much pain today and there's a real concern he wont make it. Its awful. I just dont know what to do.

Wishing all a peaceful night.xxx

No thinking about it I should not have said anything but I did so that’s that. Tbh I don’t like him much anyway.
But I’m thinking of not going on Sunday.
Ds2 and dgs (6) are staying over. But it’s not going well . He wouldn’t eat dinner though I gave him something hes liked before. Then he didn’t want to sleep in the bunk beds though his dad would have been with him so I had to sort out the sofa bed downstairs for them and hunt for a duvet etc. I’m on the edge of tears the whole time.i know a lot of it is because he’s on the autistic spectrum but it’s still hard. Especially when he has sleepovers with lots of members of mummies family.
I feel like walking out and never coming back.

Thats understandable! so much piling on. its so difficult to get it right with an autistic child you don't know well - one is making guesses. And the fact he settles more on other family sleepovers as they all know where they are with him better. don't give up on that tho, I hope he sleeps OK on the sofa bed ..its practice.

As regards the man who was thoughtless and unkind, some people are just insensitive they might be hurting others. They pride themselves on telling it like it is and don't worry about hurting others. By all means have a break on Sunday - but don't give up one the church because of him. It is so uphill for you.

It sounds like it's going to be an adventurous treat for your friend, Doodle. The fiords in Norway - I'd love to go. You are right you can make it special for her. Umbrellas in the rain - now, that is quite a challenge, portraying water moving. I am very relieved that your wrist I healing well. its been a long haul.

*Sweetpeasue what I have picked up on in your post was that it went well with new friend - will you see each other again? she clearly felt comfortable in your company. I just wish for you that DH picks up for the big family gathering. Quite a challenge as well as the dreaded comparing oneself with others who are weller and more active - well I would feel that.

The key thing is more complicated than it sounds. Basically by ringing the charity whom almost certainly have the keys and giving them my address (for posting keys to me)
I have made myself vulnerable for entry to my house and car until I get replacements: and it's not a well known and relabel charity, in fact seems marginally dodgy, although in London. I will be safe key wise on Sunday as I have arranged to have the keys totally changed by the best local company who fitted the lock.

The car keys will take longer to sort and my car sits in the drive. Cost wise AA key insurance will cover some but it's a hassle and a concern until house and car keys changed, the originals if the charity find it will work. No one can get in the house at night...tho as the keys are jamming the door.

However its. warning to me, slow down! think first! stop rushing!

Wyllow3 What a palaver about your keys. Hope you get it all sorted out quickly - so you can't use your car at the moment? We all make mistakes when we're rushing or distracted. I once "lost" my car keys at work, searched everywhere thoroughly twice, rang DH to come and bring me the spare key, then when I got home I found them down my bra! Glad you had a good day with your cleaning lady friend and CPN.

ScaredyCat Thank you. It's so much easier just to wash my hair and not have to worry about colouring it. Glad you're enjoying your holiday.

EllieAnne Don't let one silly man put you off going to church. You've got as much right to be there and pass an opinion as anyone else. Why were you left to deal with your GS? Shouldn't his dad have been responsible? You perhaps do too much for people instead of making them do their share.

Doodle My brother's life could be so much nicer if he spent some money, but he hangs on to it all. Glad your wrist is healing well now. What did you have for lunch at the hospice? Nice that you saw your son and family. Are they going abroad?

SweetpeaSue Your book club friend sounds nice. Will you visit her again/invite her to yours? The ASlopecia you've got - have you ever seen a specialist? I Googled it (I Google most things) and it seems Minoxidil could be prescribed. My eldest son (45 this month) has been losing his hair since he had Covid 5 years ago, but nobody in the family is like it (not grandads either). I do hope your husband will feel up to going out today. I know you love seeing your sisters.

Not doing much - just boring housework - DH is going to be doing a job at Son2's. Hope everyone has a decent day x

Now that made me smile, HVDY, even a wee chuckle, "down your bra". Have a decent regular "doing this and that" day yourself.

Yes, the key sorting out is a lot of hassle, - 4 important keys but I do have a current spare car key, it will be reset by the person that calls with the new one to a new thingummy jig so the lost key cannot be used. It's time really - tomorrow I have to rush home from Quakers and so on.

I've spent ALL the morning on admin, and sorting out the desk top on the computer including all the MrA stuff into a folder, editing my photo collection etc, filing stuff...

It actually feels good all sorted and some "putting things behind me - I'm so tired really such a busy week I cant be bothered to get dressed so afternoon in bed and a nice shower later.

Yes I wondered if Sweetpeasue would be helped by Minoxidil. I'm making an effort to massage in rosemary oil and promising myself to try and keep it up for simple hair loss its to go to natural remedy but maybe not for bald patches.

Just send the mail carpet by aperitif time, Scaredycat - it can pick BD's up for an hours sharing, then whizz us back. 😎

Magic carpet not mail carpet.

Hi all
EllieAnne- don’t let one ignorant ,rude man spoil going to Church for you. Your feelings and opinions matter as much as anyone else’s.
Sorry your Sons visit wa a bit fraught but all children whether on the spectrum or not can be awkward. As for food - just as unpredictable.. you punish yourself for other people’s actions - he probably kicks off at the other relatives houses too. I do,think though that your DS could perhaps have helped you more. Your tears are more those of frustration at the difficulties of your life in general. I,m so sorry for your unhappiness.
Wyllow- things like your key problem make me a bit demented- I am so security conscious and drive DH mad sometimes.i admire you for the cool way you,ve dealt with it all.
Well done on getting sorted - it’s a good feeling isn’t it.
I,m sorry your lovely cleaners Mum is poorly- you are a kind and empathetic friend for her- I think you have a great mutual understanding between you.
Wow - must have been brilliant here when you were younger and hitch hiking. Yes the beaches are stunning and so many of them. I love Tregastel beaches. The ones here are lovely too.
Doodle- It will be hard at times in Norway but sharing it with your friend you will make new memories and enjoy different experiences.
Glad your wrist is doing well and you can drive OK again. I expect it was the sun and the concentration of driving that gave you a headache- hope it’s gone now. A nice day with lunch at the hospice and a visit to your DS- are they going somewhere exciting?
Yes thank you we are relaxing and enjoying it here very much- it is very beautiful.
SweetPeaSue- we are very lucky as we have another week left as it’s so true what you say - a week flys by.
So nice to hear of your visit with book club friend. She sounds like someone you feel comfortable with and a new friendship will be so good for you .
Do hope you get to see your Sisters and husbands - do they live close to you? Hopefully DH feels better today-
HVDY- I laughed at your car key story. If I dropped my car keys down my front they would end up on the floor!!
Isn’t it annoying when people won’t spend any money when they have plenty of it. What are they saving it for? I know we all have to be careful but there’s careful and just plain tight! What a shame- your DB could do some nice things for himself and his family.
My DS still has good hair as has DD - it’s me who,s hair has seen better days!!
Don’t do too much housework - it,ll only need doing again tomorrow.

Expecting you all on the carpet any minute - with Wyllow driving!!

Love to allxx

Wyllow3 There's barely any room down my G-cup bra (I'm complaining, not bragging!) It's so good to get things organised, isn't it. I think the nice weather makes me want to have a clear-out of "stuff". I did washing, vacuuming, mopping and general tidying. DH put 3 new electrical sockets in at Son1's (he's a qualified electrician).

ScaredyCat My brother said he'd like to go to the cinema (I've been with him several times in the past), but he refuses to pay £8.50 - that's for the OAP afternoon film. He's bought his son a leather settee but then told him not to let their 3 cats on it . He asked for my address earlier (perhaps he's sending something to me?). We've lived here for 35 years! Oh, you've got another week to go - I know you always make the most of life, so carry on enjoying your holiday. A magic carpet would be great.

We are on our way, Scaredycat, a bit late for you, oh dear I forgot the extra hour....I'm sure the pastries wont go to waste...

Oh my I googled the beach and its wonderful - these days google maps gives one lots of pictures. The little tiny houses in the shelter of big rocky outcrops and the way there are lots of rocks making lots of mini beaches as well as the port bit. There wasn't just the Hitchhiking holiday, when my DS was a teenager we went to a standing camp at the very very most Westward spot - just glorious.

That is one impressive day there HVDY. Satisfying, all nice now. 35 years. I have moved a lot.
It has had the advantage of shedding Stuff along the way. I can't imagine having such a generous bosom as they used to say, as a modest "B" I could not hide keys tho at the gym do slip a bank card down if I've got a haircut in the middle of being there.

Your brother doesn't ever seem to have worked out the basics of what is hard to do, which is to go towards people to meet needs to be with others. I mean, quite a few of us have real difficulties in that respect but we sort of know the theory.

I had a snooze and now nattering away online still amongst the great unwashed and in my nightie. Well things have been overwhelming and its entirely necessary tho I'm glad no one can see me atm!

Sweetpeasue our DS 1 lost all his hair before he was 22. He cooed well with it even though it must have been upsetting.
Hope you had a lovely time with your sisters and that your DH was ok.
Wyllow I feel good when I’ve had a real sort out admin wise too. Hope Mr A can be out behind you and you can relax a bit more in Quakers. I’m watching Fearless on Netflix. New series I think. Like it so far.
HVDY your brother certainly knows how to make things difficult for himself. I’m assuming he can well afford the cost of the cinema but won’t pay it just to enjoy an afternoon of distraction. Again you’ve had another busy morning. I feel lazy by comparison. Just been working on my art project.
Scaredycat glad you are enjoying your holiday it sounds lovely. dS1 and family are off to Croatia. They’ve been before and loved it.
Ellie Anne having a grandson on the spectrum is hard i know but try and remember no matter how hard it is for you it’s so much harder for him. You think he can control his behaviour but that not necessarily the case. Until our grandson was an adult and could explain things to us better, we had no idea of the trauma he went through as a child. Things you wouldn’t think twice about caused him so much anxiety and stress. Sometimes it would come out as bad behaviour but looking back now I realise how much he was holding in and trying to cope with. Please don’t think it’s you he has a problem with.

I do apologise for fairly quick post.
Very tired after a really nice lunch out with sisters and DH came even though hes not well but not quite like yesterday. His ankles are so swollen and seem to be persistently so.

Thats an awful lot of hassle* Wyllow* with that key loss. You could have done without all that worry. Ive just woken up half n hr ago but really needed an hrs sleep after all the talking - well listening mostly- hardly got a word in edgeways!
Scaredycat Glad Wyllow googled rhat lovely cossy where you are ,I could picture it all. Sounds so beautiful. Enjoy it all as much as you can . I really wish there was that magic carpet for us all to meet you .
HVDY Made me laugh about your keys being found in your bra. So funny - you must have recounted that many times to family and had a laugh.
Thanks I had Minoxidil prescribed free for 6mths by a Dermatologist I was sent to just after my mum died ( I was 43) when the hair loss seemed to start. Was sent to her for that and another intimate 'thing' that started ( my periods went haywire and missed my first period when found out my mum had Pancreatic cance) . It never made a difference and it was an upsetting humiliating experience being placed under an overhead camera taking photos of top of my head( all quite scientific) Ill not go bald but am losing it still.
Hope your DB will go back to Men's Shed when it reopens.
EllieAnne I feel the same as Doodle and Im sure your DGS hasn't any problem with yourself. Maybe bunkbeds felt a bit intimidating for him and he took a dislike for his own reasons. Do ask for help when you're tired and ask your son to help out. You do so much.
Doodle I bet your son was quite upset at that time to lose his hair so quickly. It still affects men and their confidence more than most people think. Your art subject does sound quite daunting. I wouldnt know where to start! I just haven't got the drawing/painting skill in me. I remember crying at infants school when a teacher forced me to fingerpaint- it was all cold and slimy!
Sure teachers are much better now.

My friend and I agreed we'd meet again in the summer holidays for a coffee at the town where she lives.

Take care everyone and hope for dreamless sleeps for you all.x

Scaredycat I meant coast - though Im sure you have a lovely 'cossy' too!

Wyllow3 Even when I was 7 1/2 stone (many years ago), I was a D cup. They've been the cause of much unwanted male attention over the years. My brother isn't interested in people or their lives, unless a person can serve a purpose to him. Strange to me, as I really like getting to know people. If you're comfortable in your nightwear, it's fine. I've just got my pyjamas on and put my face cream on.

Doodle How upsetting for a young man of 22 to lose his hair. My son shaves his head occasionally. My brother has got around £40k in the bank, won't buy anything or eat out. I'm usually more productive when DH is out. Housework is a necessary but very boring chore to me. You certainly aren't lazy. You also do a lot with/for the church. DH and I love Croatia, have been several times. Wise words to EllieAnne.

SweetpeaSue You managed to see your sisters, that's good. It's a shame your husband doesn't feel great. Are his ankles swollen because of the warm weather? Mine are. I try to put my feet up when possible. Oh, what a horrible and embarrassing situation to have a camera like that when you already felt vulnerable. What a shame the treatment didn't work. Could you try a hair topper thing? My brother plans to go to The Shed place on Tuesday but not Wednesday when it's due to be 30 degrees.

Nothing much on TV so I'm going to listen to music via the headphones. Hope everyone has a restful night x

Hmm, "Fearless" (just looked it up, Doodle) looks classy and my sort of thing - social justice with a strong thriller element and strong woman heroine against the baddies.

Sweetpeasue I'm so glad you made it but it is sad as you were concerned about, it was tough for DH at all. They sound a talky crowd it sounds like my family as children all trying to get a word in! Feet up or cool tub of cold water for DH. And definitely a cat for a sleep afterwards.

Now that is good as regards the meet up with the friend.

Hmm, is it worth revisiting the Minoxidil? Cant do any harm, maybe help a bit?

I badly need a holiday break, but going away in August - no, I wouldn't get my quiet holiday wherever I stayed. Last year I went to a much loved hotel saved up for and well, terrific, it was the week after MrA' assulted me.

But I have found somewhere nearer to me nearish to Bridlington near childhood Filey and the Yorkshire wolds (as in childhood Hull) -by googling, should be more reasonable in September I must grasp the nettle and ring them and find out if its reasonably sociable for travelling alone. Mind you, as long as I have wi fi I never really feel alone as long as I have a nice quiet sunny room. (I dont feel like going far away atm)

Tv is awful tonight. We are on to our second midsomer murders. I’ve seen it before but can’t put the Tv off because we’d be sitting in awkward silence.
Ds is really good with wee one. They do gentle parenting,I had to look it up but it means showing empathy and discussing issues etc. probably works best with him but he does get told no if he oversteps.
I’m looking after him in a few weeks while they are at a wedding. Ds wanted me to have him here but I’ve said no because he gets distressed. I’ll go to them.
Still really worried about church. I’ll have to go out but I might just park somewhere and read .
Oh for the magic carpet.
I’ve always had a big bust and being small looked out of proportion, was uncomfortable and clothes didn’t look good.
A while back I had a bit of money so I decided to pay for a reduction. I had to tell dh because I’d be in hospital for a couple of days and he made a face and sneered. I walked out in tears.
Didn’t ask why I needed it or show any compassion.
I went ahead anyway. The surgeon couldn’t take away as much as I wanted but I’ve never regretted it.