Black Dog 31

Doodle No, it's not ready to be collected yet. Probably tomorrow. My BP isn't massively high (average is 147/79), but the GPs seem to think it's a cause for concern. I'll take the new medication but plan to stop the Ramipril in a month, as it's not doing anything. What did the afternoon tea consist of - sandwiches and cakes?

How's everyone else been? I didn't fancy going to the day centre, so DH and I had lunch at a lovely country pub we like. It was delicious.

Oh I see about the thread starting, HVDY. If you go to a new forum there is an orange box that says "start a new discussion" so you tap that.

Ooo, a nice lunch at the pub.

EllieAnne I'm glad you got out to see your DGD. You need to do as much of that as you can. How does it feel to be "home alone".
the critical point is when they discuss discharge plans - could I advise you to ring your local Age concern or similar to find out what your rights are as regards care? and be honest about the hostile unhappiness at home xxx

Your church is so lovely, Doodle. Like my Q zooms for loving friendship except better as real people.

The tooth was awful overnight, but I got an appointment in 3.5 hours. Lots of drilling on a back molar with a view to having a crown or tooth removal if it doesnt work out. I should say, Dentists dont bother me, I dont get nervous. She is so good. It's a try it out or remove. I had already in the morning spent quite a happy time taking photos as a wanted some for his DGD to lure her up again to stay with the family. So I did 'Agatha (the croc) and Granddad" and a place for her set at table, or wait goer her to join her Granddad in the garden picking apples etc.

but today was tough. Yes, "D" stuff. Ive had abusive and weird pretty demands from her: well, her MH has collapsed after messing a lot of folks around badly, tho I was no 1 target. she actually was due to see MH today.
but the worst thing was that she has been working behind my back with the man who assaulted me to try and pressurise me to somehow let him back. I really thought she had accepted it has happened, but it appears not, all the time, and given she was in a position of power for a long time and clearly influenced others when she said oh it was never an assault etc...

I mean, it was October '25 when the s assault took place which turned my life upside down. so my compassion is somewhat limited although I understand in theory her grandiose pronouncements of recent as illness (she thought she was God or an Angel advising others)...well...

(too many reminders of my abusive but ill husband saying to me he would kill himself or me)...

but the nice thing also today was that F who has been very very ill indeed in Hospital mentally and physically is out in a nursing home now and wants me to come and visit ☺️

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202610/medium-dww50s-croc.jpeg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202610/medium-5ocs3r-shed.jpeg

I missed your post, Sweetpeasue, how has today been for you?

Best wishes for a decent night, BD's

Thanks Wyllow
Still struggling with bowel probs( sorry tmi) . Really nice day and visited Tarn Hows. DH still in pain with legs- so difficult.
Decided travel home tomorrow ,even though one day early. Such a great escape from worries and been lovely week ,though easier to leave in our own time and not early on Sat.

Sorry for your dentist problems and hope you dont need extraction- that would be a nightmare for me - cant stand the taste of blood and have already lost molars.
Love to all BDs

Operation today.
I had a meeting yesterday with surgeon. Son 1 and wife arrived unexpectedly too. I think din l realised when I saw them at the school show that I wasn’t coping on my own.
He had two options.
Try to divert blood flow from the right to the left which may not work because arteries are so badly clogged. But if it works it could save the leg. The other is to go straight for an above knee amputation.
He had already decided to go for the amputation but after we discussed it and got doctor daughter on the phone he reluctantly agreed to at least try to save the leg.
If he has the amputation they have said he will never walk again.
I can’t even think of the implications of that. The house would need adapted and there’s no way I could get wheelchair in and out of the car. It wouldn’t fit anyway.
Far too much going round in my head today.
All I can do is wait for the phone call.
It’s amazing how many cupboards you can clear out when you are stressed.

Wyllow3 Glad you've got the tooth sorted out (I hope it works out well without having to have it extracted). I get nervous about the dentist. I cling to the arms of the chair - and yet I haven't needed any treatments for years. Love the photos of Agatha. The assault was almost a year ago, yet you're still reminded of it. As for Quaker D believing she was God or an angel - she's clearly "not all there" and needs some medical help.

SweetpeaSue I'm pleased you had a good holiday. Sensible to drive back today - hope you'll avoid a lot of traffic.

EllieAnne Your husband must be terrified. Faced with the possibility of losing a leg at any age would be terrible, but at 80 would be even worse. I hope that won't happen. Your family need to rally around you more now and offer help to you both. I hope they will.

It's a dark, wet morning. Shopping and aqua aerobics later, not much else. Thinking of ALL BDers but particularly you, EllieAnne x

My dear EllieAnne, what troubles! what I do feel glad about is - the family stepping up. You need their support at his time and I'm just glad you did "show" it. Now you have someone to ring about this and that and aren't totally alone xxx.
Whichever outcome there is, it's likely to be a long time before he can come home they will have to assess his needs and the house. I can imagine those cupboards. It's also the kind of issue people at church, the half decent ones, will understand. It's practical as well as emotional. Grab any support going and please keep us in the loop.

I can completely understand leaving a day early, Sweetpeasue. as you say, you've had a pretty good time, all considered, and it's raining today. No it's not TMI (when I think of some of the stuff I have posted!

My "new" crown on my tooth (it's a temp one) is hurting.
Yes really.
She built it up a little too high, so every time I press my jaw together it get pushed in...
I will have to ring them at 8.30 on the dot. Yesterday they said, "no spaces" for customers today but she will have to cram me in, the tooth is supposed to be there for about 2 weeks before a permanent one.

Must admit am nervous if they wont see me today, but happily I feel OK about the dentist not like poor you, HVDY
Yes - it's raining here of course. I hope aqua aerobics goes well as usual.
(Agatha enjoys being a star).

I feel low about the D thing knowing how all along....I was planning to go back to the little meeting, but not until D's mania is under control. Even then...but let's see, treatments take its course. There is a nice bloke I can have a chat to about it all and I will.

He runs the meeting as does L, but L is dealing with it full on and most certainly does not right now want to hear my queries.

I've only read back as far as EllieAnne saying operation is today. So forgive me for ignoring people. So sorry about your husband and everything you're coping with EllieAnne. And good advice from Wyllow3.
Wyllow3 they must see you today surely (dentist).Fingers crossed.
HVDY I absolutely hate dentist. I have had 2 extractions last few years. My dentist refers me to a private clinic for nervous patients. Costs me a bit, but affordable. Makes such a difference.

Oh EllieAnne I'm so sorry about your DH and of course there must be so much going through your head right now. Wyllow is right, it will most likely be a while before your DH is allowed home and I so hope they dont have to amputate in the end.
You need to lean on your sons a bit right now and I hope you find out who are your real friends are too. X

Hope you have had your temp crown sorted Wyllow you wont want that pain over the weekend.

Just short post as v tired. Arrived home - had to get someone to switch on gas as workmen working in our Rd had switched it off. Also small bevel in bedroom ceiling - water leaking from tank . Shouldn't be too serious , hopefully, as DH thinks its ballcock has risen too much( no idea what all that is about , Im hopeless Im afraid).
DH's legs awfully painful but hes about to get ladders to look in loft. Ill have to watch him .

Hope everyone is ok. Be in tomorrow. X

Oh dear, I do hope the water situation has stabilised. I do understand the situation in your attic, its older style water management. If he's done it, a well done for him and hopefully boost his "can do" feelings. Heating on, etc.

Well, not what was expected at all. Anticipating a quick dentist visit, (yes got in no problems, they are good)

got dressed up for a "romantic lunch out" and nice walk with A in swirling leaves:

We went to dentist "en route" : the pain was quite serious by then, there was a wait cos more than one for emergency slots,

and it was not just the slightly built up tooth - that was a trigger - the tooth's split went down to the roots,

"we'll take it out" "Yes please".

It came out all in one piece so I was lucky.

So picture it: arrive at nice quiet pub, swab in mouth, get a brandy down (medicinal) and watch A eating a very nice lunch. Home, hit the pillow, pillow now needs a wash...

Pah, but I saw the funny side. so much for dressing up.

I actually don't mind dentists, it must be terrifying if you do, and they are part NHS and I'm one - and it's an excuse to go back for another lunch.

So tomorrow cancelled everything. It was to be a Quaker Day and my big venture into town, but secretly am relieved as

Having had both jabs last Saturday, and 3 dentists this week calls for me to genuinely take it easy - not just say I will

Oh Wyllow that's horrible. You really do seem not to mind this dentist stuff !
You poor thing.
Bright side indeed - another nice lunch out for you and A ,to make up for it.
Do take it easy now, though.

Evening all. Lovely walk and chat with the group this morning then big shop and coffee with friend this afternoon
Wow Wyllow you coped with that in a matter of fact way. I’d be a wreck having a tooth out let alone going for lunch (even if you didn’t eat) after. Glad it’s sorted now though. Yes take it easy tomorrow
Sweetpeasue glad you’re home ok. Hope the water leak isn’t serious. Hope your Dh is careful
nadateturbe hope you have a peaceful weekend.
HVDY hope shopping and aqua went well. I went out with walking group then walked around town for a while. My legs ache tonight. Does aqua make you tired?
Oh Ellie Anne I do feel for you. I remember the day they told DH they might have to amputate his leg. The most horrific thing to contemplate. As it was, the op worked but other factors didn’t work in his favour. Big hug for you in this stressful time.

Scaredycat are you back home now?

Hi all
We,re home!! Just a little while ago. Sorry posts have been sparse but didn’t have internet everywhere.
We had a good holiday- in parts. Wouldn’t go on a coach holiday again too much sitting down and regimentation for us

almost all on coach were new to it like us and all said the same. We had great people on the coach and laughter all the time. Scotland was beautiful but we wanted to be in the scenery not just looking at it.
Have caught up with your news but will write better tomorrow.
EllieAnne- I,m so sorry that your DH is in such a bad way - I know your situation but it’s still a hard thing for you both to deal with . Yes let your family help take the strain and see after yourself- it’s a chance to enjoy your home and relax sometimes.
HVDY- I can’t imagine you being afraid of anything. You have gone through so much. Hope you enjoyed your day with Aqua and shopping.
Nadateturbe- pleased to see you in.
SweetPeaSue- glad you got home safely nd had a lovely time.
Sorry DH legs are still so painful- hope he was all right going up those steps.
Doodle - I think if you had a coach trip it would be better if you stayed in one place and took trips out each day. It was really tiring how we did it.
Wyllow- love the photos - Agatha is very photogenic. Ow that turned out a different day for you but that means you can arrange another time with A. Think you need to give yourself a bit of time to heal.
Tomorrow we pick up our boys and my car which has been repaired while we were away.
Love to all- can’t wait to be back in our own bed!!

There is never anything like coming back to your own bed Scardeycat. Well, you said it all really - however lovely, one wants to be "in the place not driving by it". Mind you, there is something to be said about train holidays that have a mix of staying in places then a scenic rail route as you see things you cant from the road.

Well walked, Doodle!

Wyllow3 You did well to get an urgent dental appointment. Glad you had the tooth out ok. What a shame you couldn't eat anything. You'll have to arrange a nice lunch with A another day.

SweetpeaSue Hope the leak wasn't too bad and that your husband fixed it. Hope he rests his poor legs.

Doodle Aqua aerobics doesn't make me tired, but my legs ache a bit afterwards - the programmes we follow on a screen have lots of kicking and jumping in them. I really enjoy it. Did you walk far with your walking group?

ScaredyCat I know what you mean about coach holidays - we went to the Isle of Wight, and there was too much sitting on the coach and going to places we weren't interested in. I'm frightened of the dentist because it's a situation I have no control over. I don't mind MRIs, though. There's nothing like your own bed. Your boys will be glad to see you tomorrow.

Jaffa and I are having an evening without DH - he's at a beer festival with Son1 (Son2 usually meets them there but goes with friends). I've got to pick them up later.

Well, I bet they have fun! Prepare for two rather sozzled men.

Those who are cat lovers might enjoy this light hearted thread
www.gransnet.com/forums/news_and_politics/1362238-Speedy-recovery-old-boy?msgid=31810428#31810428

Good morningeveryone, just a short little hello to everyone. Doodle that sounds like a lovely day yesterday. Out walking in the fresh air. And busy afternoon too. I bet you were tired, but pleasantly so. I love getting out for a coffee, has to be a cappuccino.
Scaredycat hope you slept well. Glad you had a nice time, albeit not perfect. Thanks for info on coach tour. I think there are advantages and disadvantages of tours, but they're good if you can't drive.
Sweetpeasue good idea to return early rather than a very early morning start. I do hope the leak is easily fixed and the ceiling dries iut. Not nice to come home to. And your poor husband, that's all he needed. Bowel issues can be painful and difficult and not easily solved. I'm the same atm. Asked for appointment and gave me young male locum.. next week. Stupid surgery!
Wyllow3 what a day you had! And you coped so well, still going for lunch. I hope you're taking it easy today.
HVDY your pub lunch sounds lovely, I like them, or used to, in winter when there's a real fire lit, so cosy. Your GP sounds good, actually contacting the hospital. Hope your new medication helps. Did you have a "sozzled" husband . 😃 . I do envy you having family so close.
EllieAnne thinking of you.xx

I wish you were closer to your family, nadateturbe.

Here's a fun one for all cat lovers I am browsing u tube after doing a big chunk of my opus whoknowswhatus* and photographing all the art work I've done so needed a fun break

www.youtube.com/shorts/zKVx4F9Uyig

Yes, I'm pottering around music and chat.

(*a sort of autobiograhy with pictures and life themes, Probably never to be finished. since I change my mind each time I look at it.)

Wyllow3 It was a real ale event, so no boozers there - just men (and women) having a nice time and sampling proper beers (Son1 now has gluten-free ones). It was held at the cricket ground in Nottingham. I picked them up ok, and Son1 talked to me nonstop, all the way to his house (9.5 miles). It was a late night for me (11.30 when DH and I got home), and Jaffa was waiting for me to go to bed . Larry the cat is the only good thing about 10 Downing Street! Love the catty theme on YouTube. How many photos do you need to take? (of your artwork)

nadateturbe This particular GP is new (ours is a teaching practice), and I haven't seen him but have spoken to him on the 'phone, once. I'd suggested this tablet - he hadn't heard of it - and had researched the side effects and whether it's ok with the things I already take (5 other tablets). I'll see how it goes. I wish you had family nearby. Do you send emails, do Skype, etc?

EllieAnne Thinking of you and your husband.

Discovered a good programme on itvX. It's "The Street", a Jimmy McGovern one, with lots of well-known actors - Sue Johnston, Jim Broadbent, Timothy Spall (before he lost all that weight), and Jane Horrocks, to name a few. It's a gritty, Northern play, with true - to -life characters.

Hi all
HVDY- you summed up a coach holiday perfectly.
The boys are so happy to be home ad we only had 20 minutes yowling on the way home .
My Sis and her DH love real Ale and would have enjoyed that Festival.
That programme you recommend has a good cast - must remember it.
Nadateturbe- We did sleep well thank you. So good to be home
Doodle- What a nice day you had yesterday while we were in the coach - if I never see another motorway service station it,ll be too soon😩
EllieAnne- hope you are coping OK and your family are giving you plenty of support. I do hope your husband doesn’t lose his leg - it would mean a loss of so much for both of you.
Wyllow- thank you for the cat themed post😻
I think your “opus” would be a cracking read- especially with illustrations too.
Hope your mouth is more comfortable today.

Love to all - think the hols washing is dry so a bit of ironing to be done. X

May the Rainbow bring you brighter days

What a simply lovely picture, Scardeycat..the balance of dark and light, and the rainbow, just a "wow". Well yes, motorway services have their limits. Aw, 20mins yowling

Well my son would have loved that real ale event, HVDY . I like the way it loosened sons tongue ups bit 😊 on the. way home.

I'm probably going to have to keep about 800 images, online, out of 2000, HVDY, the others either rejected or deleted after choosing. Got about 100 actual original artworks. But still making bits and bobs. It's an adventure going back to the impulses that made them. Just do it bit by bit and not get wound up. There are words as well.

ScaredyCat That programme, "The Street* is on BBC. It was made years ago but very well-written and acted. Each episode is different, about a different person on the same street. You did well to get all your washing done. Now to iron it.... that's a dream photo, with the rainbow like that.

Wyllow3 Son1 always talks a lot, especially when he's had a drink. He gets political - both sons chat with me about in-depth things. DH doesn't talk about anything serious.

Started my new tablet this morning- the diuretic. It's a low dose so hasn't made me wee any more frequently than I already do. Not been out today, so had a lazy time x

Beautiful photo Scaredycat.
Will have look at that program HVDY. Hard to find something good.