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Help calm me. House buying and selling stress *Part 9*

(1001 Posts)
Spice101 Sun 08-May-22 05:26:43

Part 9

Link to previous threads

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1301322-Help-calm-me-House-buying-and-selling-stress?msgid=29374951

karmalady Tue 02-Aug-22 10:41:10

razzamatazz, thanks for the update, I was missing you. The second person seems a good`un, very sound advice. Bottom of the pit now but onwards and very much upwards. I can see you doing a noisy jazzy jig when all this is finished. Your aged neighbour, he is also a good`un, some would have turned the other way rather than help.

Neighbours need neighbours, we help each other here. I am looking after garden and greenhouse for 3 weeks for one and have lent the other my `precious` two wheeled barrow. They help me when needed. I have never been dependent on them so they are not worried that I would impose Sometimes you just need a helping hand or even just a chat

Yogi, is your son a bit on the spectrum? Another neighbour here in an established house has an adult son on the spectrum and they converted their garage for him. Moving into the studio is a wonderful idea

I have changed my vod phone plan, sim only and am going to pay £60 less for the coming year and £17 less the following year. I am pleased about that

Oh gosh I don`t sacrifice my comfort at all and I don`t hold back on the food I get, which is mainly organic or home grown but it is always good for bits and bobs of cash to be in one`s own pocket rather than contributing to energy company profits

Fingers very much crossed here, it may be that we will get notification in a few months about a massive upgrade to the public transport system in this town, we are not definite yet but what a godsend that would be

Franbern Tue 02-Aug-22 09:29:14

Razzamatazz so pleased to hear from you. No it appears horrendous at present, but it means you are now on that final stage and can really look ahead to seeing that work finished, and you having a wonderful, new floor throughout. Then you can work out whether to have carpets, laminate, etc. etc. laid there. This really is the beginning of the end.

How are your dog and cat coping with all this upheaval?

Nothing like the same, but my London Daughter is in the second week of having her kitchen completely re-done. She is having the kitchen door blocked so that her sink will now go there with a window above it. That door did contain the cat flat for her two rather elderly brothers. So, before any work could even start she had to have a floor to ceiling double glazed window removed (part of the bay windowed patio door area), and replaced with a new unit, with a cat flap cut into it.

The cats have made it very clear they do not approve of this change to their lives. They are using it - no alternative, and as they also dislike having the workmen coming in and out, they have to keep going back out into their garden, but are quite disgusted with it

Anyway, hope all the work proceeds as quickly as possible and without any hiccups. Within a very few weeks you will be able to look back on this horrendous time with a sigh of relief that it is all over.

Aldom Tue 02-Aug-22 09:24:40

Razzamatazz hoping all will go well for you. I can only guess at how stressful these past months must have been. Looking forward to seeing photos of the finished work.
Very best wishes. smile flowers

Razzamatazz Tue 02-Aug-22 09:08:45

Another person has come this morning - he's advised having the chimney bricks removed to increase the air flow around the room.

I won't ever be opening up the chimneys, they are too short to have satisfactory open fires. Next door light theirs in the winter and the smoke and smell are dreadful.

Back to Better Call Saul, good tension for the stomach muscles!

Razzamatazz Tue 02-Aug-22 08:09:52

Morning all, bit monsoonish here this morning!

New name, I need to completely detach from my other user name, don't refer to me as that in future please smile

First day of floor removal went well, with the exception of the man leaving and the wood turning up. Very luckily my 70+ aged neighbour volunteered to unload the lorry or I'd have been very stuck.

Lucky we don't have smell a vision, the smell here is horrendous. Apparently the floorboarded bedroom at the front had been repaired, and the repair attached to the already rotten joists. I thought I'd caught the wasps nest as they'd just started - wrong! It's the size of a football, was on the end of the joist adjacent to the airbrick.

Yoginimeisje Tue 02-Aug-22 07:59:19

Yes looking forward to hearing how Shandy is doing, she certainly deserves some peace & comfort after all she's been through.

I do as much money saving as I can, but same as Fran wouldn't sit cold in the winter or not turn the fan on when it's hot. I always sleep with the fan on, find the whirring noise quite a comfort.

My son doesn't practise money saving, but then he doesn't contribute to the bills. He has a 30min shower every day and cooks his meal in the oven the 3 days I don't have an evening meal due to my work, so if he moved out I would expect my bills to go down a lot.

He's a bit difficult to live with as he hates TV, radio and lights in the evening, so when I come in from my work, as I did yesterday at 10pm, it's pitch black indoors, I daren't turn a light on as he would loss it. He has moved his bed into our garden studio and is doing it up so he can have that as 'his place'

Franbern Mon 01-Aug-22 08:32:15

Thinking of Shandy this morning. Hope all has started well and her floors will be done and she can, (finally) really start to settle down in her home.
Spoke to my eldest daughter yesterday, first week of her kitchen total overhaul completed. Her sister met up with her on Saturday and was able to hand over to her my little single electric hob that I used when I had my kitchen done. She was so delighted with this - told me they had eaten scrambled eggs that morning, thanks to this. Sounds as if her builder/fitted have done a lot of work in this first week. Demolished and removed all of old kitchen, built up wall where kitchen door was and replaced with new window over - what will now become - her sink area. Shell of the new units all in place. Combi boiler moved to new place. She was only without hot water for one 24 hour period. I am looking forward to seeing it when finished.

karmalady Sat 30-Jul-22 14:51:02

nothing wrong in passing frugal skills on. Personally being the eldest of 7 and with parents who were very poor but practical, I leant so much as did all my siblings. I could make a cake with one egg, cook a meal for 9 in a pressure cooker by the time I was ten. Could knit and sew as well as play. We were very happy and are all close

Myself and siblings all know how to stretch the money, some people never had the chance to learn, skills and ideas are for sharing

Franbern Sat 30-Jul-22 13:40:14

Regarding 'cutting down'......For several years I have read all 'those articles about 'saving money' economies, etc. etc. Problem has always been that I have never found any that I do not already carry out.

ALWAYS only used washing machine with a full load. Discovered many years back that no point in doing separate loads for whites and coloureds etc. All go in together, have used 40 degrees or lower for past several years.

Have not used a kettle for heating water for about five or more years. Up to recently had a counter-top hot water heater, now a 'boiling' tap .Only have used my main oven when cooking multiple items,. Use microwave and - in the past - halogen oven - now compact air fryer. No takeaways, only the very occasional family restaurant meal. Minimal spend on clothes, at my age, the ones that I have do me very well year on year - with just a single item added each season.

Lights always turned off when not in room, Okay, I do keep some things on standby - but that is items that I use often. It is only the matter of pennies per year they cost.

I have long used Supermarkets own brands rather than named ones for most articles that I purchase. No longer run a car, and use bus (free bus pass), Have little, (if any) food waste - menus worked out in advance of shopping. Only use my slim dishwasher when I have visitors for a meal, otherwise wash up in bowl in sink.

Do not go on holidays, never fly anywhere -indeed have not even renewed my passport when it expired last year.

So, really am not sure how I can be more careful. I refuse to live uncomfortably, either when it is cold or very hot, so do use my CH and my fans. Yes, I do have individual rad controls.

I am managing my finances reasonably well. Micawber like, as long as I spend slightly less than I receive in I am more than happy. No investments to concern me, my only income comes from my Pension and Attendance Allowance.

In fact, I have far fewer financial problems now than I did back in the 80's when had the family at home and we were barely existing on disability benefits my husband was getting due to his multiple sclerosis. Then, I did go hungry (children never did), could not put on heating at times, hid when milkmen rang bell to collect his money, etc. etc. Lived in total dread of anything breaking down - would have nightmares when a new noise appeared in home - took me decades to recover from that!! No money for repairs, let alone replacements. New clothes were totally unknown for many years.

karmalady Sat 30-Jul-22 10:45:47

yogi, this thing about making a positive out of a negative. You can see all over the place, the ones that bemoan everything that is bad and lets face it bad things do happen but the survivors say `ok now how do I cope with this?` There are survivors on this thread

So now for most of us it is about the cost of living and energy going forward. Basically the only two things that we can cut back on are energy and food, fixed income means no extra money can be added to income, scarey for many.

I have been dealing with energy use, was always eco-conscious anyway but I am seeing real results from air fryer, switching things off at the wall, only necessary amount of water in a kettle and always turn the kettle off when I hear that roar. I have a temperature dial on my kettle and it continues to rise at that point, uses all the heat in the actual metal and in the element. Washing too, not any longer doing small washes but waiting for a big load and always doing 30 for delicates and 40 for cottons and linens. The sun helps if there are any stains on eg dishcloths

Shandy, I do hope that you are home and not stuck anywhere with a rail strike on, especially now with work starting on monday

Yoginimeisje Sat 30-Jul-22 09:33:28

Thank you Karmalady. Sounds like you had a nice little trip on the bus through the countryside and explored a new village, well done you.

karmalady Fri 29-Jul-22 12:54:20

Yogi making your garden more private is a good thing, to actually do something about your problem was to turn a negative into a positive and positives are much better

I am spreading my wings after lockdown and started using the bus again. I went to a town, not too far away but through so much lovely countryside and a large village. I only walked around a bit of the centre, found the loo and came back. I didn`t buy anything because I can get everything I need here and better quality

Yoginimeisje Fri 29-Jul-22 08:05:42

Yes swap to the nearer dealership [Karmalady] I've stuck to my original car maintenance co. but it's not too far, do have to get a bus back though, still don't have a bus pass!

You made a good move Whiff you sound very happy there. I'm settling in, but it's not my dream home. The area is wonderful, but my road not. You only know when you move in these things. I love my garden. I've put a gate on the front end and a fence at the back [of back garden], so it's not open anymore, feels so much better like that and keeps my upstairs neighbour out.

karmalady Thu 28-Jul-22 11:38:46

lovely post whiff and yes how quickly time has flown by, it emphasises the importance of not dilly dallying about that important decision to move house, after all it involves masses of other things too such as where, money, what to keep and what not to keep etc

I am going to explore the next town shortly, where dealership 2 is and without navigation. It is horrible trying to slip from one lane to another when traffic is going fast but I used to do all that, it is the age thing plus far more traffic these days. It makes sense as that town is closer than the one I am familiar with but that does not stop the stomach churning. Biting the bullet is not easy

Whiff Thu 28-Jul-22 11:05:46

I well remember when I first joined this thread March 2019 . You helped me such a lot Karmalady and made me realise I wasn't alone. You , Franbern and others where going through what I was . Not having my husband to lean on was hard. After always making decisions as a couple suddenly it was only you. But for all the tears and sleepless nights for me moving has given me a new and better life. I existed in my old house now I live my life to the full.

Found out a lot of things about myself. I am stronger than I thought and nothing new daunts me. All the tradesmen I used did a brilliant job and my home is exactly as I want it. And my gardens look lovely.

Have wonderful neighbours and brilliant health care. If I hadn't moved I still wouldn't know what was wrong with me. But I was born with it which was a surprise.

I have never slept so well since moving. When my friend visited last month she said how much I had changed for the better I might add. She loved it here and could see why I did.

Get to see my daughter and grandsons every week hard to believe her eldest will start school in September.

Overall I am happier than I have been for years. Still have wobbles but we all have those. Be 3 years on the 9th since my move. How time has flown by

Take care everyone.

karmalady Thu 28-Jul-22 08:44:12

yogi, your house is now your home, you made it so. Your garden is a stress-relieving haven and you seem to have adapted very well. I am glad

I wasted the whole day yesterday fretting and researching about navigation system for my car. The like for like dealer replacement quote was an arm and leg, the quote for my request was less than half, still a lot of money. I will be going with that one but need to know the answer to a couple of interface seaming questions first. I have become very dependent on sensors in my car, to help me be safe and to know where to go when I drive. So far I have the quote from dealership 2 but dealership 1 (one) was very busy, I understand that and the person involved could not be back in touch until today. I have been to dealership 1 for 16 years, it is much further away since I moved and It won`t take much for me to leave my comfort zone to go to dealership 2 for this and future custom.

Cs was the beneficiary of another two items yesterday, I killed time by moving this and that in my kitchen as I was waiting for phone calls. The other day they had 14 sewing patterns and before that was sewing books

I do hate it when something fills my mind, when I have important things that need to take over for a while. Very different from my normally calm state of mind. Shandy will know, when there is no husband to talk with about decisions. Anyway, I slept really well last night and I think my mind is working things out, even in sleep

Yoginimeisje Thu 28-Jul-22 07:50:23

I agree with you about the garden Karmalady I've worked hard on my garden since I moved in, it's looking good, love it, sit out first thing in morning & in the evening with all the lovely twinkly lights. Thinking of putting a small shallow pond in and then it will be finished. I then have a little painting to do in the house and that will be it too.

karmalady Wed 27-Jul-22 08:19:29

Try and stand back Franbern, I also get this stomach churning when any child does something with a `what if` in my mind. It just stresses me for no reason, we should try and be more detached and leave them to it. I do think that closer to school is good in many ways

My car is serviced and mot done, all was fine but now the complicated navigation system has failed ie broken and the scan showed that it has been failing for quite some time, it is in-car and now dead

I was up late and rose early, it was on my mind because I know that dealers charge over the odds but I have had such good service from them and the guarantee is worth a lot to me, so I getting it done by dealer. Loads of money needs to be spent and I am bracing myself. At least I can ring them today and give them an exact replacement make and model for a quote, better than leaving choice to them.

That was/is stomach churning for me and I have bags under my eyes. My thinking is that I love my car, a top range yeti and it is worth putting decent equipment into it, something that is designed to fit and to link seamlessly with other components. I will keep that car as long as I can drive and it really is a modern classic. Sigh, I wish electronic things would not go wrong

I received 50 basket strawberry plugs yesterday and have planted into bigger modules. From ebay, really good plugs in great condition. Just over £1 each but I have to replace my strawberries. I get flowers, pink, red and white and lots of fruit so, for me, it is value for money and does brighten up my patio. I believe that garden is part of house, an extension to it and involves costs to remain pretty

Franbern Tue 26-Jul-22 09:25:52

Heard last night that my daughter (and family), have accepted an offer on their lovely house on the South Coast. They have only been there for three and a half years), and have had an offer accepted on another house nearer their children's school.

Only put their house on the market a couple of weeks back, so all is happening very quickly. I do hope that it all goes through without hiccups, but am concerned, on their behalf, of several upsets on the way. Between moves and rentals (between purchases), this is will be their sixth new address in about eight years.

karmalady Mon 25-Jul-22 12:08:12

cotton should not fray much if at all, it needs bashing in a washing machine, rather than being gentle in a bag. You could zig zag the two ends if worried

Teacheranne Mon 25-Jul-22 10:35:57

karmalady

teacheranne, yes always pre-wash any fabric as you would when it is a garment. There is a very comprehensive sewing thread on the arts and crafts forum. Lots of help there

Thanks, I’ll get washing!

Am I likely to have problems with the cut edge fraying? Or should I wash the piece ( 2.5m) in a new washing bag?

I’ve never washed a piece of fabric before.

Yoginimeisje Mon 25-Jul-22 08:30:42

Thanks for all those labour saving devices Karmalady I haven't had a dryer since I came back to live in the UK, so about 28yrs! I do wish I had one in the winter times, but can do without it.

Fran when I lived in Africa we didn't have a washing machine, we did have a 'house girl' {& boy, he did the garden etc] she washed our clothes by hand in the bath, when I look back I feel so sorry we didn't get a washing machine for her. It was early 80s and no one had one out there, but I think if you really wanted one you could get it. No ironing for me now. I used to watch my dad lay the fire too. Did have a real fireplace in my last house and would light that at Xmas times.

Yoginimeisje Mon 25-Jul-22 07:59:35

Very well done Shandy on all that you've achieved. Look forward to hearing from you when it's all done and looking lovely. Take care till then.

karmalady Mon 25-Jul-22 06:01:57

teacheranne, yes always pre-wash any fabric as you would when it is a garment. There is a very comprehensive sewing thread on the arts and crafts forum. Lots of help there

Teacheranne Sun 24-Jul-22 22:43:35

I hope it’s OK to ask this question! I’ve been following your posts for a while as I’m thinking of moving house again later this year. However, my question is nothing to do with houses!

I read some posts about a lady who prewashed fabrics before sewing them. I’ve not made any clothes for years although I used to sew a lot of my daughters clothes but I bought a kaftan last week and when I saw how simple it was, I’ve ordered some animal print poly cotton to make one myself.

I’m now wondering if I ought to wash it first to avoid shrinkage? If so, how do I do it, by hand or in my machine as I would wash the kaftan once made? Also, will the cut edge fray and make a mess of the fabric or I am over thinking it?

Any advice about washing or indeed the sewing would be appreciated. It’s going to be a very simple pattern, just two wide rectangles with a slightly curved neckline. I will only have to hem the shoulders, neckline ( with bias binding) and bottom as I’ll be using the full width of the fabric as the width of the dress so the sides will have the selvage.

Thanks

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