Gransnet forums

House and home

Visitors, shoes on or off?

(166 Posts)
Franski Thu 28-Aug-25 14:51:03

What do you do about asking visitors to take their shoes off...? I dont have carpets so it doesn't bother me. When we went to a dinner party recently we were asked to take footwear off.. it was cool and wet...i felt a bit daft in my barefeet and cocktail dress. What do others think?

Calendargirl Thu 28-Aug-25 17:37:04

In her hall she kept a row of what my husband described as “pixie boots” in every size and she made every visitor wear them

Well personally, I wouldn’t fancy donning footwear that numerous other folk had been wearing.

I don’t think I would bother visiting her again either.

NotSpaghetti Thu 28-Aug-25 17:41:53

We take shoes off unasked - so do our friends it seems.
Not workmen or carers.
I notice one carer has a pair of "indoor" shoes she brings in in a bag.
Mostly they don't.

eazybee Thu 28-Aug-25 17:46:53

I wouldn't dream of asking people to remove their shoes, particularly work people who are busy doing a job
If carpets are so precious, cover them with another floor covering.

Bukkie Thu 28-Aug-25 17:56:55

I am the opposite of you Aveline. I think it's rude to keep shoes on in someone's house. Carpets are expensive and English streets are covered in dog dirt. I always take my shoes off and don't think it's offensive to ask or be asked. My horrible thankfully deceased Mother in Law refused to take her shoes off claiming it to be rude to be asked (laughable from the rudest person who ever lived) and walked oil into cream carpets on the first day in our new house. I wanted to cry and never forgave her.

crazyH Thu 28-Aug-25 18:09:21

My little grandchildren always take their shoe, but their parents don’t 😂

crazyH Thu 28-Aug-25 18:10:18

Ahhh - no edit button 😫

AskAlice Thu 28-Aug-25 18:11:31

I usually take a pair of indoor slip-ons when I go to family/friends for a get-together. I have a "fancy" pair for parties and a plain pair for other visits. All the GC take off their shoes automatically, even the 2 year old! I'm not too precious about it (I have a Vax carpet cleaner that I use regularly and my carpets are pretty bog-standard mid range pricewise) unless it's really wet and muddy outside, when all my visitors/family take their shoes/boots off without being asked.

I have noticed that all the workers we have had in the house over the last few years also take their shoes off automatically.

Mollygo Thu 28-Aug-25 18:13:07

eazybee

I wouldn't dream of asking people to remove their shoes, particularly work people who are busy doing a job
If carpets are so precious, cover them with another floor covering.

I don’t ask people to remove their shoes, but we do cover floors if workmen are coming. what we do.
Although the kitchen fitter, the plumber, the decorator and the gas man brought their own dust sheets.

eddiecat78 Thu 28-Aug-25 18:15:10

What about your own shoes? I never ask anyone to take their shoes off and I certainly don't change my own shoes whenever I go outside eg to hang the washing out or feed the birds

Bukkie Thu 28-Aug-25 18:16:21

AskAlice I have noticed workers take their shoes off too now or bring a pair of indoor shoes without even asking. Since the dreaded above mentioned Mother in Law from hell incident I haven't had to ask anyone to take their outdoor shoes off they all do automatically.

Lovetopaint037 Thu 28-Aug-25 18:17:56

Always take slippers or just ask if I should take shoes off.

Bukkie Thu 28-Aug-25 18:18:12

eddiecat I have a pair of crocs that I slip on when I go outside to hang out the washing, get the wheelie bin etc...

watermeadow Thu 28-Aug-25 18:18:59

I expect anybody coming in to take off their shoes. My carpet throughout the house is very light grey and I can’t imagine how anyone could set foot on it in outdoor footwear.
I spend the summer barefooted and winter in slippers.

butterandjam Thu 28-Aug-25 18:24:33

Shoes on here. Visitors just have to accept they'll get dog hair on their shoes.

Daddima Thu 28-Aug-25 18:40:40

I would never dream of asking a visitor to remove their shoes. Carpets and floors can be cleaned.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 28-Aug-25 18:47:11

We have always been a shoes off family All AC are the same, GC automatically take shoes off wherever they go.

Only exception is if we are having a large indoor gathering/party, then I will clean the carpets next day.

I always ask when visiting someone’s house for the first time shall I take my shoes off

Shelflife Thu 28-Aug-25 18:51:30

I would remove shoes if asked but would appreciate prior warning so I could take lightweight indoor shoes with me. I am unable to be barefoot for long! I think it is an imposition to ask guests to do that, and what really annoys me is, if I am prepared to remove my shoes I expect there to be a seat there for me!
We have family members who insist we remove our shoes- so we do ! In our house it is certainly not expected unless of course they have been on a muddy hike.

Visgir1 Thu 28-Aug-25 18:52:01

I'm not fussed, I don't ask folk to take them off, if they do it's up to them.
And I wouldn't take mine off unless I was asked.

Ziggy62 Thu 28-Aug-25 18:53:48

Daddima

I would never dream of asking a visitor to remove their shoes. Carpets and floors can be cleaned.

Agreed

I always remove my shoes when I get home but don't expect guests to do the same, how very rude some folk are on here

Aldom Thu 28-Aug-25 18:57:00

fancythat

I think there has been a thread about this before.

From what I remember, the conclusion was, it is a more usual thing to do if someone was not born in the Uk.

Everyone I know prefers shoes off at the door. No one minds friends changing into different shoes once inside. I always take indoor shoes when visiting friends.

Rosie51 Thu 28-Aug-25 19:17:30

Wouldn't dream of asking visitors to remove their shoes although my children and grandchildren usually do, their choice. I'm assuming nobody who is 'shoes off' has a dog or outside cat as they don't have shoes to remove? As for wearing slippers from a communal basketful, no thanks! If I'm going to stay overnight or longer in somebody's house I'd take either slippers or 'inside shoes'.
I've noticed people like the gas boiler service engineer etc often offer to remove shoes or use those blue shoe coverings, and I always tell them not to bother, unless I can see they're obviously muddy.

GrannyIvy Thu 28-Aug-25 19:19:44

Shoes off in our house. Most visitors bring their slippers if staying overnight. Grandchildren always take their shoes off and they have their own sliders at the back door to put on if popping into the garden. However DH has one friend who comes around every week for a cup of tea and I have to ask him to remove his trainers every time which always make black marks on the kitchen floor and he will always try not to and it really irritates me and he knows it!!! Tradesman generally always remove shoes or put shoe covers on.

foxie48 Thu 28-Aug-25 19:39:12

I've never asked anyone to remove their shoes. We live in the country and wellies or walking boots are just removed as a matter of course and left in the conservatory or boot room depending on which way they arrive. If anyone comes to supper or for the weekend they usually arrive by car and I wouldn't dream of asking them to remove their shoes as I know they wouldn't arrive in anything dirty and if they did, they wouldn't ask me if I wanted them to take them off, they'd just hoick them off without asking! My home is to be enjoyed and lived in, so quite frankly if someone came in and muddied a carpet it wouldn't be the end of the world. I do object to the dog being allowed to run around with dirty paws so we now have a hot tap in the stables where he gets a quick wash and dry but he still makes a mess, fortunately he is much loved and totally forgiven , much like my husband who probably makes more mess than all my visitors put together!

Aldom Thu 28-Aug-25 21:44:43

I never ask anyone to remove their shoes they just do it, as I do in their homes. Not a problem and people always feel welcome at my house and I in theirs.

Anniebach Thu 28-Aug-25 21:54:21

No, surely it could make a visitor feel uncomfortable