Loan not being paid back

Oops old post!

This is a very unfortunate situation Frogsinmygarden and I do feel for you. It's heartbreaking when the trust you have with someone, especially your own child is broken.

I think the suggestion to write to her is a good one. Explain that you are disappointed that no effort has been made to start paying back the loan, that it was the last of your savings and you are concerned that it will not be repaid. Ask her to let you know when she intends to start repaying the loan and how much each instalment will be, as you're in need of additional income.

IMO when money is loaned, whether or not there is anything in writing, the recipient as well as the lender know this to be the case and know that loans are to be repaid. That is the difference between a loan and a gift.

If the money is not repaid and you wish that to be your D's only inheritance, you can state that in your will as the reason for her not being a beneficiary, if that's what you decide.

If a charge was to be made against the house, it would have had to have been made at the time the mortgage was taken out Soupy and at the behest of the those providing the cash deposit, to protect their investment.

Understandably, some parents are unwilling to pursue legal recognition of monies loaned in case it's seen as a lack of trust in their AC, which makes it all the more hurtful when by making no effort to re pay the loan they do indeed break the trust that's been placed in them.

Oh I thought it was January 2022, and it's from January 2021.

As some posters have pointed out, if a mortgage is involved parents will be asked to state that the money is given without strings attached and they will make no claim on the property. We did this with money transferred for our son to help with his house purchase a few months ago. However this was actually money we were holding for him after the settlement of my father’s estate so no worries about repaying it. I agree with what others have said about best not to lend what you cannot afford to lose.

GillT57

Kali in UK there is no legal requirement to leave your estate to your children as it is in France I believe. Any of us can make a legal will and leave our estate to whoever we wish, as many people have found to their great surprise in the death of a parent. However, if there is no will, the usual laws of the inheritance apply

Thanks, I was not sure.

Might be an old post, and must say I did not notice this. But it is a very 'interesting' situation that could happen to many. I do wonder what happened, and it would be so interesting if the OP could update.

When we have helped with deposits, we were told that legally it could not be a loan, but a gift- but that it could be deducted from inheritance if not all children have had the same help.

I read Judge Rinder's column occasionally and he never holds out much hope in a case like this where there is no written, signed and witnessed agreement between all parties. I would get an urgent appointment with a reputable solicitor to see where you can go from here. I really feel for you.

GillT57

Kali in UK there is no legal requirement to leave your estate to your children as it is in France I believe. Any of us can make a legal will and leave our estate to whoever we wish, as many people have found to their great surprise in the death of a parent. However, if there is no will, the usual laws of the inheritance apply

I believe that is the case in England. It is not the case in Scotland where a child is entitled to a share of the estate.

singingnutty

As some posters have pointed out, if a mortgage is involved parents will be asked to state that the money is given without strings attached and they will make no claim on the property. We did this with money transferred for our son to help with his house purchase a few months ago. However this was actually money we were holding for him after the settlement of my father’s estate so no worries about repaying it. I agree with what others have said about best not to lend what you cannot afford to lose.

It's likely the daughter lied and said the money was her savings Smileless. If she had revealed that the money had been either loaned or gifted her parents would have been required to sign a form saying they had no financial interest in the property. So unless OP didn't mention that, the daughter lied.

As I said up thread

Kali2

GillT57

Kali in UK there is no legal requirement to leave your estate to your children as it is in France I believe. Any of us can make a legal will and leave our estate to whoever we wish, as many people have found to their great surprise in the death of a parent. However, if there is no will, the usual laws of the inheritance apply

Thanks, I was not sure.

Might be an old post, and must say I did not notice this. But it is a very 'interesting' situation that could happen to many. I do wonder what happened, and it would be so interesting if the OP could update.

When we have helped with deposits, we were told that legally it could not be a loan, but a gift- but that it could be deducted from inheritance if not all children have had the same help.

There's no legal reason why the money can't be a loan, but the fact that it comes from a third party should be declared to the lender.

I learned a long time ago that where money’s concerned people just can’t be trusted. It changes people. I’ve seen it several times.

The last of your savings! You have been silly and I feel for you. We never like to view our children in a bad light but the blinkers have to come off now. I don’t know what advice to give. You’ve had some good replies. I wish you well and hope you get some, if not all, of your savings back.

I understood there were tax implications if it was a loan.

Sorry I should have been clear. I meant England and Wales, not UK

Kali2

I understood there were tax implications if it was a loan.

If you charge interest you must declare the interest receipts as income. But apparently N/A here.

I wonder if Frogsinmygarden might come back to let us know if she made any progress and, hopefully, has seen her DD.
It was a salutary tale and a very sad one too.

That's interesting Germanshepherdsman. We did invest money into our ES's and wife's house for their deposit, before we were estranged of course, and had a charge against the house drawn up.

In practice it’s best to write it off because there is no written agreement, daughter will probably ignore you anyway. Involving solicitors and courts is only going to cause you more grief.
You can leave your estate to whoever you want but you must provide for your surviving spouse

Please don't write a formal letter asking for the money back. Just speak to her and try and maintain your relationship, you are her parents