updating paperwork regularly and dying tidy

Germanshepherdsmum

A poster commented recently that her husband carried all their finances in his head. The most dangerous place imaginable.

That made me 😂😂😂

Although perhaps it shouldn't have!

DH has meticulously listed everything we need to do in the event .......
I really should do the same.

I tried to `teach` my husband while he was still alive, I made sure he had his own credit card because being second named on my card was not enough to tide him over. There are lots of bills to pay when widowed btw. He would never have coped with the finances if I had gone first

I was married less than a year and he gave me the cheque book for our joint account and asked me to look after the money. Some people just don`t want to know or to face things in later life. It is inevitable that we die but not inevitable that we leave a mess of affairs behind us

Karma, DH was always the main credit card holder, despite the bill being paid by me.
I too realised the difficulties, which would arise and organised a second one, where I was the main cardholder. It makes sense.

Recently, we bought new tablets and after updating them, ensured we could get into the banking apps for each other's credit card accounts.

My ongoing serious health problems have resulted in us fine tuning, what is already in place.

#Sensible, but not smug of Glasgow.

I was once asked by a son to help a recently widowed elderly lady to claim a tax refund. She produced a load of unsorted paperwork( this was before online really became the norm) and a good hour was spent just sorting into type and date order. She had not got a clue. How much harder now that many things are online only.
It has been really hard work sorting my late husband’s finances out, especially subscriptions and continuous payments etc, but anything with a paper trail, well organised and filed, is much easier for family to cope with. So that is a hefty nudge to myself to tackle the pile of filing today.

I was told that a Trust had to be a maximumm of FOUR people.

My ex-hubbie was also told this when he wanted to set up a Trust in his will for our five children.

Several years ago, when I got rid of my home office, afind threw out the filing cabinets as they were ugly. I purchased a tall slim, very sturdy Ikea drawer unit. five shallow drawers and four deeper ones. THIS is now my filing cabinet. So all paperwork is easy to see and to find. One of these files is the deeds t my flat plus all infrmation that the Solicitor may requre when it is being sold. A further file in one of the drawers contains my will (my AC all have a copy of this), plus birth, deed poll, marriage, divorce etc certificates. A book kept near to my laptop (An A-Z directory) contains all my passwords etc. My children all know and understand the code I use for my credit card numbers, etc.

I agree that we really should try to make it as easy as possible for our AC, when we die. No matter how old we will be when that happens, it will be a difficult time for our children, and at least we should do whatever we can to make it as simple as possble

There can be any number of beneficiaries of a trust but if it’s a trust which owns a house or land the maximum number of owners of the property in England and Wales is four. There can be additional trustees, but ownership of the property is limited to four.

karmalady thank you for posting this. It has made me realise that I need to sort out my 'papers'; something I am very disorganised about!

I file everything as it comes in. Once a year, usually around April/May time, I go through the whole lot and throw away anything that is no longer needed.

mumski
was it very expensive and difficult to get out of the Trust? Did you have to get the agreement of all 5 children. Did any of them object? I'm thinking about that too. It might be easier to just write a straight forward Will. In case I need the money.

Take advice from a solicitor.

Saturday 2.30pm: have just sat down to check emails after a session sorting out the kitchen and the paperwork that had accumulated there and then read this post! Feeling very smug and pleased with myself although after DH died earlier this year I did a huge amount of filing and now try to keep on top of it so that when that day comes . . . . it shouldn't be too difficult for the DDs.

One thing I think is important is to keep an actual written paper record of accounts, passwords etc (not on your phone, tablet, laptop etc).

It concerns me the way banks etc are pushing everyone to go paperless and use your phone for everything.

When my brother died unexpectedly we couldn't get into his phone (as we didn't know his password) which had a knock on effect for trying to access his email, accounts etc.

There must be 1000s of accounts out there that beneficiaries have no knowledge of because there is no paper record of them.

This is from Age UK and helps you organise your information ....

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/money-legal/end-of-life-planning/lifebook/

PS A trusted person knows my passwords.

AgeUK's end of life book covers everything

When my in laws died they each left a large file box labelled “The Out File”. In it we found details of everything that we needed to sort their (limited) estate, wills, bank details, solicitors numbers and details of what sort of funeral/ memorial they would like. It was so helpful, especially during the weeks when grief makes you numb and stress can cause family relationships to become strained.
We have copied their lead and have included an internet password book in each of our files. We also have a yearly chat recommended by Martin Lewis (Have the Unpleasant Issues chat on his website)
It is not hard to do now, but will hopefully save one of us and our offspring a lot of stress in years to come.

I should just point out that once you have informed the bank or other institution of the death, access online via password may be blocked as it is not legal. I agree that it is very useful if you can find out information online, but do so before you inform the bank.
However Ancestry refused a refund of 10 months subscription as they said it had been used since the date of death. Yes, by me, trying to check when it was due.
I also really struggled to sort out some of DH’s subscriptions to software or websites, where the payments were via Apple Pay. Trying to speak to a human being took much time and perseverance and a promised refund has not materialised. PayPal and credit card companies were very helpful, as was his main bank.

Don’t just leave your passwords with your trusted friend Grandmama. What if they die or become incapable? Keep details with the rest of your papers. Look on it as backing up your computer files.

What's the point of placing property in Trust especially if you have very little authority in it. Some think it will avoid paying care costs. Having been involved on those assessments the first question would be "Why did you do it?". Never came across an answer that was acceptable to justify the action.

My husband and I made wills etc but I am now a widow, and have had to remake my will. Whilst i have done all the financial stuff and the PoA etc etc, I have also written a list which my son knows about. I have many friends from different parts of my life and have left people paintings or som eof my glass or music especially scores and paper music that I have used in concets etc. Individually they are not worth a lot of money, but they represent our friendship over the years . Having this written down, should one person die before me I can just change it etc, and I know that the majority of the things my son would not want anyway. This does not involve solicitors, does not cost anything to keep and update and will help my son to both clear things away and from his point of view get rid of things. I do think he will follow my wishes but I shant be there to worry about it and just feel pleased that my friends will be recognised for all their kindness and friendship over the years.. On a slightly different point, I have always wished that when you left school that the opportunity would be taken to check your weight, height blood pressure and to get a simple will made. Whilst young people will think they will go on for ever there are sad accidents and unexpected deaths which leave families totally stunned and with no idea of what that young person wanted which adds to the grief. My son some years ago lost a very close friend. He was a good rider on a motor bike but the van that came out onto the main road still killed him. It was a great shock and sadness to them all but mitigated a very little bit as the young man had told his family and friends that he wanted to donate his organs in such a case as this. It helped in the sad situation and was a small help for the family to know that 3 lives were saved by the donation of organ. If we all had to make a simple will at that time, it would encourage us to keep up to date with things and might even make us take more care on the road.

I have a friend who has never married her partner and they have been together about 40 years. No children.

They will have to do new Wills after they get married or become civil partners. They don’t know yet which they will do. The old Wills become invalid apparently.

My Mum died nearly 3 years ago. Every time I rang her she said she was “sorting out her drawers”. I used to tease her but when she passed away I found everything in perfect order. Mind you she only had one bank account, a few Premium Bonds and a life insurance policy. But her birth and marriage certificates were all to hand so I didn’t have to search everywhere.

This phrase “dying tidy” just amuses me!

RosiesMaw

This phrase “dying tidy” just amuses me!

RosiesMaw

This phrase “dying tidy” just amuses me!

Rather like the phrase "She kept herself tidy" 😁

One important thing for me is not to have auto-renew anywhere. I recently purchased a magazine sub and the default was auto-renew. I did the shopping around and found a company that did havea one-off sub, at the auto-renew price

I did use my husbands password once very soon after he died and before I informed the bank. It helped me to have quick access to some money besides that held in a joint account, which btw needed to be closed and a solo account opened for me None of this is instantaneous

Now I keep a decent amount of cash in my house, to help my executor with immediate costs