Is it offensive to tell a woman that she looks nice?

Not relevant to the issue, and yes, I did know. The current social media storm is not about her career and what she knows and does about female oppression, FGM and so forth.

I wonder if she would have minded if a woman had commented on the stunningness of her LinkedIn portrait. Probably it wouldn't have seemed so bad anyway because I don't think it would be considered politically incorrect for a woman to comment on another woman's profile pic even via a professional connecting doodah like LinkedIn. I think that such a comment coming from another woman would have been interpreted much more innocently, which is food for thought about equality of expectations.

Jane's argument does not lead logically to women being covered from head to foot. Slippery slope arguments, such as that is, are logical fallacies.

Of course it is relevant to the issue thatbags. She was on LinkedIn to further her career. The whole point is that this is the issue and how she looked is not.

What a fuss about nothing! - she should just have ignored it. It is an excellent photo and a cut above the other hazy out-of-focus ones on there.

I do not read it as if he was trying it on. As bags said - if a woman had made the comment all would have been well - or might she have been a lesbian "trying it on" - who knows?

Men are damned all the time for being predatory and objectifying women - it must be so hard to have to watch your every word.

She over-reacted - let us hope she applies a more balanced approach to her professional life.

I have a male friend who is married and he always says "Hello gorgeous" when we meet - I do not feel objectified, and his wife has no problem with it.

If we are going to have equality treated seriously maybe we need to lighten up a bit.

If how she looked isn't/wasn't the issue why did she have such a stunning profile pic? He was perfectly correct in saying it is a stunning picture. Other photos of her in the papers because of this hoohah are not stunning at all.

This hoohah issue is that she objected to a comment about her profile pic. Nothing else. I'm not saying she had no right to object, just that it has nothing to do with her career.

The thing we don't like to accept is that women's appearance is very important for solid biological reasons, just as many male birds' appearance is very important.

Obviously we don't want comments (even positive ones) about our appearance in all circumstances. Are messages such as the one Alex sent private? If so, she could have ignored it or told him, also by private message, what she thought of his comment. Instead she made it a big public song and dance. Attention-seeking, anyone?

Gracesgran If you (one) are going to say that women on a business site must be careful of subliminal messages they send out in their photos because men cannot be expected to behave like grown-ups then I would stand by what I said.
That isn't what I said at all. Most men do behave like grown ups. So do most women.
I stand by what I said about Charlotte's photograph, stunning though it is, crossing a professional barrier. Do you think Dame Elizabeth Butler-Sloss or Dame Helena Kennedy would have put a photo like that on their LinkedIn profiles?

I think I must be looking at it differently to everyone else Jane as I just don't see it as a problem. Do you have a link to the photo you are looking at as maybe we are not looking at the same one (or I need new glasses )

Luckygirl you have a relationship with your friend and are not in a business/work situation when he greets you.

I cannot for the life of me understand all this silly kafuffle over what was intended to be a compliment. 'nough said.

I'm assuming it's this one Gracesgran

It's easy to see that photo has been souped up as well. The hair hardly even looks real it's been touched up so much. It has been made to look 'stunning', unfortunately the effect is far from professional. I mean the photo doesn't look professionally finished to me. Humph.

Actually Gracesgran you are not alone.
I was discussing it with DD2 this morning and she said I have 'a lot of internalised misogyny'.

All publicity is good publicity, so they say. Cynical? Who, me?

This article in the Telegraph puts it well. Naming and shaming publicly is what has made me feel uncomfortable with this story. If Proudman had told the story without naming the man (and sent him a copy in the hope that he would rad it and think twice about such comments in future), I wouldn'r have a problem with her complaint.

It's the hauling in of mob justice that I dislike. Lynch mobs, even Twitter ones, are barbaric.

As a lawyer she ought to know better.

Oh wow!!! Did you see that!? Soop came out of lher kitchen! Doesn't happen much these days.

Hello soop.

Oh, I wish you hadn't put that pic up ja. She looks a very self-satisfied young lady.

A right poser.

I still think I'm a Celebrity beckons..

What I couldnt understand is why she is on sabbatical at the age of 27. I always thought sabbaticals were if you had worked 10 years. I wouldnt have thought she had worked any more than 5.
Anyone know?

gap year, sabbatical, the list goes on and on doesn't it!
We just went out to work and got a fortnight's holiday!

'come-hither' eyes was how one commentator put it.

However, I will not comment on that.

Yes, that's the photo. I just don't get the remarks, janeainsworth. The woman looks how she looks, it's nothing to do with how she does her job other than being able to recognise her. Some of the comments are just plain nasty - catty I think we would have called them when we were young. Surely people are projecting their own feelings onto a simple photograph. It still means people are defining her by how she looks; what that has to do with how she does her job? Female misogyny is very sad because this could be your daughter or granddaughter and those judging this women in this way are setting their own relatives up for more difficulty in their working life than is necessary.

Well done for bringing up a thinking daughter jane although I hope she explained that we almost certainly all have because of our upbringing. It takes time for change to happen and we have had so much happen recently that make us say "times were different then" and those are the times that made us. If we are bringing our daughters and sons up to be thinking people things will slowly change.

gracesgran No, the woman doesn't look how she looks. She looks how she looks when she's had her photo enhanced.
She's the one who thinks her appearance is more important than her professional experience which I agree is very impressive.
I think it's a pity that someone of her obvious ability feels the need to focus on her appearance rather than her intellect.
And you didn't answer my question about Elizabeth Butler- Sloss and Helena Kennedy.

It's not a "simple photograph", gg. It's a digitally over-enhanced photograph.