I think Kate does put her country first Annie. She had a long time to think about the implications of marriage to William, and he had a long time to consider whether or not she would be able to cope with life in a goldfish bowl, and if she will be able to cope, in due course, with being married to the king.
Meghan did not have very long to consider the restraints of royal life. The marriage came quickly. Harry had apparently been disappointed in love by a couple of girls who realising what the requirements were, decided to go walk away, and he was in a hurry to marry. Meghan in all probability had no idea really what she was taking on when she became a member of the royal family. Clearly neither did most of her family. Her mother has proved to be a good support and entirely discreet.
I was very happy for him when he initially found Meghan. Now I wonder how this is all going to pan out. I’m concerned by Meghan’s apparent self centredness and her lack of understanding of how the monarchy works. Royals do not refuse to visit the queen at Balmoral and then fly around the world to see a friend play (a very important) tennis match. Meghan doesn’t understand this. If a person marries into the monarchy they immediately receive wealth and benefits unheard of in their previous life, however wealthy they may have been already, but it is not cost free. There are restrictions and a certain lack of privacy. There are duties and obligations. Meghan simply does not understand.