New search for little Maddie

I'm not saying that we left our children alone at night (we didn't), but did the people saying that if they hadn't been alone she wouldn't have gone missing allow their children to play outside?

I often find that on one hand parents are criticised for not letting their children have the freedom to roam (they are always indoors with a screen) and on the other for not keeping a close enough eye on them. Children don't only go missing in the evening.

Doodledog

I'm not saying that we left our children alone at night (we didn't), but did the people saying that if they hadn't been alone she wouldn't have gone missing allow their children to play outside?

I often find that on one hand parents are criticised for not letting their children have the freedom to roam (they are always indoors with a screen) and on the other for not keeping a close enough eye on them. Children don't only go missing in the evening.

We never left/leave ours alone either. If any child related to us is outside - an adult is out with. Roaming is always within my eyesight.

Child abduction is not new, careful people have always existed.

Doodledog

I'm not saying that we left our children alone at night (we didn't), but did the people saying that if they hadn't been alone she wouldn't have gone missing allow their children to play outside?

I often find that on one hand parents are criticised for not letting their children have the freedom to roam (they are always indoors with a screen) and on the other for not keeping a close enough eye on them. Children don't only go missing in the evening.

Of course my children were allowed to play outside, but there was always an adult around keeping an eye on them. Even more so if we were on holiday. Same goes now whenever we are looking after our grandson.

I think the McCann's have probably suffered enough now.. judging them is not pretty

pascal30

I think the McCann's have probably suffered enough now.. judging them is not pretty

Agreed

Doodledog

I'm sure that the McCanns have said that her name was Madeleine, not Maddie. Just like Denise Bulger complained when people shortened James' name to Jamie, and 'Suzy' Lamplugh's mum, who said that her daughter was always known as Susannah. It might seem like a small thing, but I think it must be really annoying for the parents to see reports about their missing/dead children where complete strangers use shortened versions of their names that the family never used. It feels very disrespectful. I'm not blaming people on here, as journalists start it, and unless we hear the parents' distress there is no way we can know, but I do wish they (the journos) would stop it.

Oh yes, that is something that has really annoyed me ever since I heard about James Bulger's mother saying that he was called James. Do these press people think that a Jamie is more sympathetic, or more likely to arouse emotion in the reading public than a James? How downright nasty to rename someone like that in such awful circumstances. I didn't know about Susannah Lamplugh, but will now bear it in mind, so thank you, Doodledog.

We had a couple of holidays in a hotel which advertised a listening service in the evenings, so that we could eat downstairs when the children (having had Children's Tea!) were in bed, with the phone connected to the reception. There was always someone there and parents were called if any child was crying or making a noise. I have to admit that it felt like liberation. Not sure I would do it now though.

When my children grew up (in the 90s) I was criticised (as were my peers) for not letting them play outside, and told that they would be a generation of couch potatoes, of how previous generations had gone out on bikes all day and only come home for food. Mine played in the garden where there was a swing, a slide and a climbing frame, so I thought they got enough exercise, but as usual, the then younger generation was told we were wrong because we weren't leaving as the one before had done.

I can't help thinking that this is more of the same. What I did, or what anyone on this thread did with out children isn't the point. The fact that Madeleine was taken is the fault of the person who took her, and her parents must have been to Hell and back for the mistake that ended as it did.

Doodledog good post

I hope the parents get some closure. In the 70's I too left my my baby whilst at a party over the road, my ex husband and I took it in turns to go and check on her every 30 minutes. I was 18 at the time and looking back now I regret it, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.
I think the parents must regret that decision every single day. I just wish people would not keep bringing this up. I just feel so sorry for them and any other parents in the same position.
Let's just hope this is not another dead end.

It's all very well saying it's the fault of the person who took her - although it's still to be proven that's what actually happened, and you can argue all you like about 'mistakes'. However, try to put any speculation to one side for a moment. The FACT remains that no-one would have been able to take her if the McCanns hadn't left her and her siblings alone, and not for the first time either. Why shouldn't people bring this up - it's a fact. One of the few actual facts that we do know.

I agree with all those who have admitted to sometimes leaving children unattended whilst on holiday. When my first born was a baby we sometimes stayed in hotels with a baby monitor, whilst we went down to the dining room in the hotel. Once he'd fallen asleep, he was out like a light, I remember thinking we were lucky when other parents halfway through their meal were contacted by reception to say their baby was awake. Anyway all that ended with number 2, who wasn't so obliging.

Talking of number 2, when he was around 7 or 8, we were staying at a hotel in Spain spending an afternoon around the swimming pool. Took my eyes off him briefly, he'd disappeared, that disappearance was for several hours, I can't ever remember being so frantic and out of my mind with worry. The hotel was putting out announcements on a tannoy, eventually staff went knocking on all the room doors and there he was, wandered off with another little boy who wanted to show him his Action Man toys, both had been whiling away the time in his room with an array of superheros oblivious to the fact that a full scale search was going on. That was long before Madeleine disappeared. I think a lot of us looked back with a "there for the Grace of God" I'm sure it changed parents' behaviour in the aftermath. I have nothing but sympathy for the McCanns, The Bulgers and the parents of the little blonde boy who disappeared in Greece many years ago. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, sometimes it only takes the blink of an eye.

I would suggest many of us cast our mind back to our own childhoods, our parents generation were positively laissez faire as far as the hands off approach in being allowed to roam around far and wide , mine certainly let us wander off for hours on end at an early age. I don't remember parents being castigated quite in the same way, helicopter parenting just wasn't a thing if my memory serves me well.

Doodledog What I did, or what anyone on this thread did with out children isn't the point. The fact that Madeleine was taken is the fault of the person who took her, and her parents must have been to Hell and back for the mistake that ended as it did.

There ^^ right there is point to the thread.

seadragon

Squiffy

I feel sorry for Maddie’s siblings. Have they been able to lead a ‘normal’ life?

I've been wondering about them too, Squffy.

I think her sister was recently photographed attending the memorial service for Madeleine's disappearance and holding acandle.
Very sad for the siblings, not just the parents .

It would be interesting to know what they think about everything they could read online about their sister, that's for sure.

I agree with many of the comments that have been made by Blondiescot.

It is a fact that Madeleine and her siblings were left unattended, it does not matter how near the dining area was to the apartment the children were unattended.

Blondiescot is right about the fact the two parents are doctors if it had been parents from a council estate and out enjoying themselves they would have been crucified.
One thing for sure if they had been ordinary young couple
and social services even had a sniff that the children were left unattended they would have removed the siblings from the parents and took them to court for negligence, possibly getting a court order and putting them into foster care.

I do feel empathy for the McCanns they have had to pay the ultimate price for their actions, I am of the belief that Madeleine sadly is no longer alive, may she long rest in peace
every time I see the original picture of her with those big beautiful eyes she had I feel tearful. She was a beautiful child lost/or taken who knows but gone from this life far too soon.

Blondiescot

It would be interesting to know what they think about everything they could read online about their sister, that's for sure.

Really? Who would want to be tactless or unkind enough to ask them and then make it public for everyone to pick over?

Germanshepherdsmum

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

I agree. I have never left my child, on holiday or otherwise. So no, Boz, we have not all done this.

I have never left mine either even if just a few yards away.
When young I was left by my parents after they were persuaded by my uncle to go to a dance on a Butlins holiday camp. We, children, were put in the same chalet. Of course, we started to fight and it was announced in the dance hall and our parents had to come back.
My uncle really told us off for fighting my father told him perhaps it was the adults' fault for leaving us. It has always stuck in my mind.
However painful and ongoing it is for them they left her a three-year-old with two younger siblings.

Terribull excellent post.

Mollygo

Blondiescot

It would be interesting to know what they think about everything they could read online about their sister, that's for sure.

Really? Who would want to be tactless or unkind enough to ask them and then make it public for everyone to pick over?

I'm not suggesting it should be made public knowledge. But I do wonder if they've searched online for information about their sister, or if friends have asked them about what they've perhaps read online. Imagine being in their parents' shoes if/when they ask about what happened.

God rest her poor little soul if the Police do find her .
And give some relief to her parents , who must have suffered so much through the years .

Personally I agree with Blondiescot; furthermore, we do not actually know that Madeleine was abducted - she could have woken in the night and, finding the door unlocked, gone to look for her parents and had an accident. Whatever, the 'best case' scenario is that she could have had a nightmare and woken up distressed and crying, and no-one would have been there to comfort her.

My parents would never have left us unattended while going out to dinner, and neither would I, like many posters. Please lets stop with the 'everyone' or 'most people' descriptions for this essentially neglect. It is not comparable with letting children play out in the daytime.

I think that the McCanns have well and truly paid for any mistakes they made. I have nothing but sympathy for the family. There's obviously a reason for the German authorities to want this area searched and if there's anything to be found I hope they are successful.

Hopefully it will have given many people pause for thought when on holiday with small children, at a terrible price.

Boz

Yes. We have all done this; especially on holiday.
A mistake was made, I feel, in not locking the door of the apartment. There is a theory that Maddy woke up and trotted off to get her parents and was picked up by a car driven by a cruising abductor.
Nasty to blame parents.

Speak for yourself Boz !
I would never have dreamed of leaving my small children either in my own home, a hotel or a holiday apartment while we went out for a meal somewhere.
If they hadn’t been doctors, say had been a cleaner and a shop worker they’d have been torn to shreds by the media.
What Blondiescot says is quite true.

Yes, sadly they paid dear for their actions and I hope the little mite will be found and laid to rest properly.What she must have gone through doesn’t bear thinking about.