New search for little Maddie

We never left our son on holiday unless he had a babysitter or he was at the children’s club.
I think the McCanns were careless at best. Left alone in a hotel room anything could have happened to a small child.

I think the twins were about 17 months and Maddie was only around 3 years old.Anything could have happened to them left alone, not only abduction.
Those who talk of children playing outside in the street, well you don’t allow toddlers or 3 year olds to do that.

Anniebach

Parents always left children in their holiday camp chalets whilst they went dancing ,

Today 12:07 Boz

Yes. We have all done this; especially on holiday.

Not this parent.

I’m sure they have regretted the decision and they find some sort of closure.

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

what a horrible, nasty post.

You must feel so smug, as the only perfect parent around who has never made a mistake. Well done!

I said parents, not all parents.

It’s not a ‘mistake’ fp. It’s dereliction of duty. I doubt Blondiescot feels smug. Neither do I.

This has been a very strange case all along with so many different theories about what happened to Madeleine.
I remember reading at the time how initially the media here were planning to tear the parents to shreds, assuming it was a certain type of couple from some rough council estate who had left their small children alone in the flat while they went to a restaurant. Then once it was clear that it was a couple of doctors, a more sympathetic tone of reporting was used.

Then the Portuguese police were convinced the parents were involved in the little girl’s disappearance, and we all wondered if it was possible.

Yes of course they should never have left those small children alone like that, not once but every night, even ( as Kate astonishingly admitted in her book) after Madeleine asked her parents one morning where they were the previous night as one of the twin’s had woken and Madeleine called out for her mummy.

Nevertheless I can completely understand why they would never give up hope of her being found alive somewhere. All the time there is no body found there is always hope, slim though that hope might be.

They are being punished for their mistake for the rest of their lives.

Fleurpepper

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

what a horrible, nasty post.

You must feel so smug, as the only perfect parent around who has never made a mistake. Well done!

I've never claimed to be a perfect parent - far from it, but at least I can say with a clear conscience that I never left three very young children alone either here in the UK or in a foreign country while I was out eating and drinking with friends. A 'mistake' is forgetting to pack your child's school lunch - leaving your child alone like that is neglect, to say the least.

And as Jennifer says, not just the one time. A predator watching the apartment would have known their movements.

Just to add, I find it distasteful, to say the least, to accuse anyone of being 'smug' over the disappearance and likely death of a three-year-old child.

Indeed.

There are some very sanctimonious people on here passing judgement on people they don’t know who have suffered unimaginable pain and loss. They made a mistake, I’ve made many mistakes over the years and sometimes I’ve paid the price and other times I’ve been lucky. I hope they find what they are looking for and the story can be put to rest ending all this nasty speculation and malicious gossip. This is not an example of Gransnet at its best.

So anyone who criticises what the McCanns did - not just once - and says they have never left their children is ‘sanctimonious’? They did not make a mistake. We have all made mistakes and know the difference between making a mistake and putting your own enjoyment above your children’s well being. There is no nasty speculation or malicious gossip here - just a rehearsal of the facts and various poster’s’ recollections of what they have, or have not, done in the past.

Blondiscot and others ..horribly judgemental posts maybe you’re quite young or maybe you’re always stayed in posh places but certainly places like Butlins in the 60 s and 70 s had a listening service where parents went off to the shows and red coats would be on duty to listen for any crying and alert the parents
I didn’t do that but I do remember running to the shop (very close by) and leaving mine asleep

Growing up you would always see young kids sitting alone outside pubs with a lemonade and packet of crisps while mum and dad were inside having a pint
In the 40 s 50 s babies were left in their prams outside shops of course unheard of today
the McCanns have paid a huge price and I feel very sorry for them

Boz

Yes. We have all done this; especially on holiday.
A mistake was made, I feel, in not locking the door of the apartment. There is a theory that Maddy woke up and trotted off to get her parents and was picked up by a car driven by a cruising abductor.
Nasty to blame parents.

What did I just read? We have all done this.”

You speak for yourself. We never, ever did this whether we were in tents, caravans, villas or cottages ….. never!

Those children were all so tiny. Never mind the danger of abduction, they could have choked on vomit, fell on the tiled floor and broken a leg, woken up with nobody there and screamed and screamed.

Magsymoo

There are some very sanctimonious people on here passing judgement on people they don’t know who have suffered unimaginable pain and loss. They made a mistake, I’ve made many mistakes over the years and sometimes I’ve paid the price and other times I’ve been lucky. I hope they find what they are looking for and the story can be put to rest ending all this nasty speculation and malicious gossip. This is not an example of Gransnet at its best.

Well said, Magsymoo. I do wonder how many times a day, every day, the McCann's tear themselves to pieces with constant "if onlys". Yes, it was wrong to leave those 3 children unattended, but they don't need anyone else to heap blame on them, as its additional weight can only ever be a tiny fraction of the blame they must constantly heap upon themselves. They are still living a nightmare, and will pay the price of their actions for the rest of their lives. I pity them, and feel no need to add further recrimination to their already extreme suffering. We are all flawed. Some are lucky enough to demonstrate that and to then emerge unscathed. Others are not.

I’m 72, not ‘quite young’. My holidays with my child were self-catering, in the UK, not posh. We were always together. You choose your type of holiday. Mine were chosen with the child in mind. They never involved evening entertainment. The price of choosing to have and look after a child perhaps. Children grow up and you can have the holidays of your choice then.
I didn’t grow up in an area where children were left outside pubs but the fact that something happened then doesn’t make it acceptable now.

I hope they find her. The parents have suffered enough.

BlueBelle

Blondiscot and others ..horribly judgemental posts maybe you’re quite young or maybe you’re always stayed in posh places but certainly places like Butlins in the 60 s and 70 s had a listening service where parents went off to the shows and red coats would be on duty to listen for any crying and alert the parents
I didn’t do that but I do remember running to the shop (very close by) and leaving mine asleep

Growing up you would always see young kids sitting alone outside pubs with a lemonade and packet of crisps while mum and dad were inside having a pint
In the 40 s 50 s babies were left in their prams outside shops of course unheard of today
the McCanns have paid a huge price and I feel very sorry for them

Who's making judgements now? I'm neither young nor did I stay in 'posh' places. In fact, we couldn't afford to go to the likes of Butlins when I was a child - holidays were spent with family members. I've already pointed out that, while I was far from being a perfect parent, I never once left my children alone when we were on holiday. We holidayed in the UK when they were very young, either in caravans or self-catering chalet type places, but we didn't go out drinking. Once they were in their beds, we stayed with him. Same applied once we started to take them on foreign holidays. It would never have occurred to us to leave them on their own so we could go out eating and drinking. Why? Because we put their needs and their safety above our own 'entertainment'.

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

I loathe this 'blame the parents' attitude. There is one person to blame here - and that is the one that abducted Madeleine McCann (or the two of them in the James Bulger case).

Who would not have had the opportunity had they been there.

CatsCatsCats

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

I loathe this 'blame the parents' attitude. There is one person to blame here - and that is the one that abducted Madeleine McCann (or the two of them in the James Bulger case).

This alleged abductor would not have been able to do anything had the parents been there with their children in the first place!

Germanshepherdsmum

So anyone who criticises what the McCanns did - not just once - and says they have never left their children is ‘sanctimonious’? They did not make a mistake. We have all made mistakes and know the difference between making a mistake and putting your own enjoyment above your children’s well being. There is no nasty speculation or malicious gossip here - just a rehearsal of the facts and various poster’s’ recollections of what they have, or have not, done in the past.

Indeed.

The note difference is between making a mistake and putting your own enjoyment above your children’s well being.

Magsymoo, Doodledog, and TerriBull very good posts from you all, showing empathy and a true understanding of the nature of human frailty.

I’m ashamed to admit that we left our baby a couple of times when he was about a year old. We went next door for a couple of hours, with one of us going back into the house every thirty minutes. The house was closed up, no one could get in, and the baby was in a cot and unable to get out. I felt guilty at the time, and after doing it twice I said no, our neighbours must come to us, we will not go there. I was uncomfortable about it and still feel guilty about it all these years later. We never left him or his siblings again. I feel full of regret that we did this and indeed ashamed, and it’s over forty years ago.

Because we are human, and imperfect, we make mistakes. Sometimes these mistakes don’t lead to anything bad happening, but sometimes they do. I sometimes think of the McCanns and the regret and guilt they must feel. I think they will blame themselves, they don’t need others to condemn them. I also think about them being there with three other families who were all leaving their children in those apartments. The pressure to conform must have been huge because they all did it. Of course it’s easy to be wise after the event. I’ll take a bet that no one leaves their children now.

CatsCatsCats

Blondiescot

If the 'poor parents' hadn't left her and her siblings alone in the first place while they were out enjoying themselves, it would never have happened in the first place. Sorry, but it infuriates me that millions have been spent on the 'campaign' to find Maddie, while there are hundreds of children who go missing every year. Who is fighting to bring peace to their families?

I loathe this 'blame the parents' attitude. There is one person to blame here - and that is the one that abducted Madeleine McCann (or the two of them in the James Bulger case).

Maybe she wasn't abducted. Maybe she woke and tried to find her parents and had an accident.

Either way, if her parents hadn't left what amounts to three babies alone, she wouldn't be missing now.

Having said that, they're paying a heavy price for making that decision.