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Jealous for envious

(39 Posts)
thatbags Wed 04-Dec-13 15:09:46

Has anyone else noticed how nearly everyone uses jealous nowadays when they really mean envious? Wish they wouldn't but I guess I might as well wish for the moon.

Ana Wed 04-Dec-13 17:26:57

It must be cursed, Atqui...tchwink

Nonu Wed 04-Dec-13 17:30:15

A big cheesy tchgrin to AKA & ANA .

Aka Wed 04-Dec-13 17:36:11

Ana that's terrible tchshock

Enviousamerican Wed 04-Dec-13 17:39:15

I agree with Aqui...for me envious is a feeling more than an active verb.grin

janeainsworth Wed 04-Dec-13 17:43:57

I've noticed my American DiL uses jealous when I would probably use envious, and often when she doesn't really mean it.
For example, if I put a photo on Facebook of me on a tropical beach, she'll put something like 'Jealous!!' followed by j/k which means joking. She certainly doesn't mean that she's eaten up with kept-awake-at-night-type jealousy.

I think your definition's neat Elegran, but not sure I agree with it....for example, a sibling could be jealous because they thought another sibling was treated by the parents more favourably, but in that situation they aren't fearful of something being taken away, they are upset because they perceive someone has something they have never had.

I would suggest a more clinical take on it.
To me, feelings of envy come within the normal spectrum of emotions, whereas jealousy can develop into something pathological.

TriciaF Wed 04-Dec-13 17:44:43

Interesting question, something I've often wondered about.
Looking up the words in the dictionary, jealous is related to zealous, feeling very strongly about someone's possession of something that you want. But to me it also has the feeling of resentment and wanting to take the thing for yourself, why should they have it and not me, a negative feeling.
Envy is similar, still used a lot in french (from which it's derived) meaning a craving, a strong desire to own something because it's good. Without the negative connotations of jealousy.
If jealousy is used more on twitter etc I'm not surprised - there seems to be a trend to demean other people, emphasise their negative points.

ffinnochio Wed 04-Dec-13 17:49:25

I've always thought that to be envious was a soft and gentle way of expressing a wish to experience or to have something someone else has; a kindly expression to someone you like.

To exhibit jealousy, I've thought, is a strong and bitter expression of wanting what others have, and an active dislike of the person who has the object of desire.

Enviousamerican Wed 04-Dec-13 17:57:56

Yes ffinnochio nicely said!smile

Elegran Wed 04-Dec-13 18:14:05

I think it is the parents that a jealous child is holding on tightly to, guarding their posession of them against a sibling who seems to be taking way their love.

I should maybe have said that jealousy is about someone or something that you might lose, envy about someone or something that someone else has.

KatyK Wed 04-Dec-13 18:25:08

guilty of using (and being) jealous. blush

Bellasnana Wed 04-Dec-13 18:27:11

Isn't envy one of the seven deadly sins?!

TriciaF Wed 04-Dec-13 18:27:42

I think ffinnochio has put it neatly.

Anne58 Wed 04-Dec-13 18:29:49

My current tooth grinder is "property". Listening to Radio 4 (Moneybox, I think) people phoning in with queries about fuel charges etc, and they all seemed to live in a "property", not a house, flat bungalow, cottage, castle or hovel, but a "property"