I'm so glad to see a discussion on this topic. Personally, I really dislike 'passed away' - it sounds as if they've simply faded; 'passed' is even worse: passed where? It makes me think of mediums. I would say 'died' but I think some people find this too stark so I would try to use the same words as the bereaved person uses.
So sad I’ve nearly finished last Jilly Cooper
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