‘Birthing’

Along with "We're pregnant"

'I birthed her' is just wrong.

Well, if anyone’s interested, “Birthing” in the past was an elongated process that went from six weeks before the expected birth, when women withdrew from society, to four weeks after, when they were churched.

(Sara Cox: Royal Hustorical Siciety - a fascinating piece of research)

Birthed is a word, but seems to be applied to the person who delivered the baby, not the person who gave birth ie the midwife would say ‘I birthed three babies today.”

And I could drivel on some more, but I thought you might be interested in this little snippet.

ferry23

Along with "We're pregnant"

Now I do tend to agree with that phrase - as I interpret it as meaning "We" made a joint decision as to whether to get pregnant or no. So many women still decide to get pregnant on their own!!!!!!! - and he doesn't get his say on the matter.

I think it's appalling for a woman to make what should be a joint decision on her own. I've even had a woman I used to know tell me "Well WE've got one child and I (meaning just her) have decided to have another one by him. But I'm not going to ask for his agreement to that...I'm just going to get pregnant for a 2nd child and then tell him.....and, at the same time, tell him we're getting divorced".

One of my exes was in that position too - ie his wife made their joint decision on having children on her own (twice!!!) and accordingly I doubt he'll ever trust another woman.

Then there was the male friend who told me - with much laughter accompanying the tale - of how a past girlfriend of the time decided to have a child without anyone's agreement and came to him to tell him he was going to be a father and expecting help from him. His reply was "The impossible does happen then does it? As I'm sterilised - so go and try that trick on your other boyfriend - as it must be from him and you just picked the 'better bet' person to go to and say he was the father". Not surprisingly - she got chucked at that point.

I've certainly even known a younger woman recently that decided to get pregnant on her own and then tell the poor mug she set up as unwitting sperm donor he'd become a father again. That baby didn't happen in the event after all - the pregnancy did...but it was ended (I think she realised making a joint decision on her own like that had not been her wisest decision).

Lathyrus3

Well, if anyone’s interested, “Birthing” in the past was an elongated process that went from six weeks before the expected birth, when women withdrew from society, to four weeks after, when they were churched.

(Sara Cox: Royal Hustorical Siciety - a fascinating piece of research)

Birthed is a word, but seems to be applied to the person who delivered the baby, not the person who gave birth ie the midwife would say ‘I birthed three babies today.”

And I could drivel on some more, but I thought you might be interested in this little snippet.

Wouldn’t she say ‘I delivered 3 babies today.’ ?

There used to be a birthing stool, so it’s a word that used to be used.

Birth is not a verb and birthing as used in birthing stool is an adjective.

It was a piece of historical research. Sorry if I didn’t make that clear.

I “birthed” babies was the historical form. I don’t know when it changed to “delivered”.

Vowelising* nouns seems to be becoming more common these days. I blame the Americans.


*Yes, I know.

So many women still decide to get pregnant on their own!!!!!!! - and he doesn't get his say on the matter.

Is this really true?
I don't know anyone who has done this - unless they were using artificial insemination- and even then I think the donor would have known.

We’re pregnant!!
No you aren’t, your wife/partner is pregnant meaning being with child.
You, collectively are having a baby, well done !

I am pregnant refers only to the woman with the expanding big belly and boobs. We are pregnant is woke nonsense. Just say we are expecting a baby. Get the facts right

NotSpaghetti

^So many women still decide to get pregnant on their own!!!!!!! - and he doesn't get his say on the matter.^

Is this really true?
I don't know anyone who has done this - unless they were using artificial insemination- and even then I think the donor would have known.

It means that sometimes women decide they want to be pregnant so ditch any birth control without telling the DH/ partner/guy , so yes it’s true.

I don't remember ever trying or deciding to become pregnant. It just happened without any discussion in those days.

Lathyrus3

It was a piece of historical research. Sorry if I didn’t make that clear.

I “birthed” babies was the historical form. I don’t know when it changed to “delivered”.

Probably, whenever the expression "she was brought to bed of a child" went out of use. Might be a Victorian usage, as they were shy of the word "bed" as it had connotactions of sex.

kircubbin2000

I don't remember ever trying or deciding to become pregnant. It just happened without any discussion in those days.

Not to me it did not, surely it is your duty not to let its happen until you can afford a child and want one. I know accidents can happen but even in those days you had a choice. I do also understand that some women were totally uneducated on these matters are you saying you were one of those?

I remember someone coming to my bedside in the maternity unit post childbirth and asking me if I would liked to be churched. This would be in 1973 and I said no as didn't know what it meant ( was only 19 years of age). Anyone know if this is still a 'thing'?

Oh how I hate the ‘we are pregnant’ and women saying it too
NOOOOO WE are not pregnant the woman is pregnant the man has not got a womb to house the baby in for 9 months

I m with you Kircubbin I didn’t sit down and say let’s have a baby now, it happened I was just 20 and it was not discussed when where or how

Thank you, Lathyrus, for the interesting information.

I’d rather have “we’re going to have a baby” than “we’re pregnant” unless of course
We’re both having morning sickness and stretch marks too.

It's almost like the fashion is to remove references to the biological role of women, and language specific to women, from common use! As a feminist, I think it's scary and may be to do with trying to either placate or include men who feel excluded from what is, essentially, a process which only affects biological women. I'm sure someone has much more historical knowledge than me but if I recall from what I've read, women managed the process of giving birth with the aid of other women until male doctors came along and decided to medicalized the whole thing.

kircubbin2000

I don't remember ever trying or deciding to become pregnant. It just happened without any discussion in those days.

Or rather - what efforts there were didnt work. They must have helped to some extent - as I was born 2 years after my parents got married and my former brother 4 years after me. But the fact they had any children at all was down to "It wasnt the 1970s onward then...". Or, as my mother put it, she found a tactful way of saying it along the lines of "Medicine wasnt what it is now"....which I interpreted as "We didnt have The Pill then - or I'd have been on it and you wouldnt have been born". Errr....thanks...mother....and just as well I'd realised that fact anyway...before being told I was a "mistake".

So she decided - but contraception/abortion wasnt what it became.

I decided (in the 1970s) and that was that - not so much as a "pregnancy scare" then - unless I counted the fact that when I went to open the next packet of The Pill the inefficient chemist had given me the wrong brand!!!!! I was obviously a very different person to what I am now - as they got away with that without me storming over and demanding to see the person in charge at once about them having an inefficient assistant on something so important as that. I made sure I got the subsequent packets in plenty of time and opened them immediately after that - in case of further inefficiency on their part.

Win..
I find your comment a little sanctimonious to say the least!

win

kircubbin2000

I don't remember ever trying or deciding to become pregnant. It just happened without any discussion in those days.

Not to me it did not, surely it is your duty not to let its happen until you can afford a child and want one. I know accidents can happen but even in those days you had a choice. I do also understand that some women were totally uneducated on these matters are you saying you were one of those?

Yep..... (bar my mothers two accidents)....but yep...

Though I wasn't exactly joking when I used to comment on "My body wouldnt have dared to pull that stunt on me...I think it would have 'known' what I might have done (ie other than have an abortion obviously and it probably wanted to have another 60 years or whatever life it's due for". There is absolutely NO way I will let my body make decisions instead of me (the person living in it).