Cats.

We are so lucky! We are in an ex council estate with the garages and car parking spaces away from the houses. Our garden backs onto the school playing fields and a huge area of trees and bracken. The cats are encouraged to go out in the back garden so they are not tempted round to the front of the house where they could eventually get to the road. In 15 years we've had no accidents and neither have any of our neighbours with cats.

Sometimes you can train a cat to wear a harness and then you can take it out for walks on a lead. I did suggest to D.D that she did this but it fell on deaf ears! Now of course she wishes that this is what we had done!!!!

We used to have 3 cats and had a cat lady to come in every day to see to them - worked very well. We opted to keep them in with litter tray, but she was happy to let them out for a while and then get them safely in.

Oh poor you! It is so difficult, and that is the reason OH and I won't have any more cats, love them as we do. I do hope your new little puss stays safe. I must say I am counting the hours till little Robbie goes home! I have made him a sort of play area with my airer, on it's side, my wicker washing basket, again on it's side, a cardboard egg box, tinckly balls newspaper two feathers and various other odds and ends in an attempt to keep him amused till he goes - it's sort of working!! but he is wandering around crying a lot, which is so sad.

We had the upset of having a cat run over just under 2 years ago, and it was heartbreaking. We have, however, taken in another rescue cat, but my heart is in my mouth every time she goes outside, even though I know that she would be miserable if kept in. We refuse to let her out overnight though, daft really, as she can just as easily be run over in the daytime. If we go on holiday, she will of course be going to a cattery, we know of an excellent one.

I think there are two schools of thought over indoor versus outdoor cats. In the USA I understand that no one would dream of letting cats out into the big wide world. I have friends too who keep their cats firmly indoors and others who wouldn't dream of restricting them in this way. I think if you plan to have an indoor cat then you have to start from day one and never let them out; They have to be provided with lots of toys, and cat toy stations etc and then they can be pretty contented. on the other hand cats were designed to hunt, climb and do outdoor cat things, but then your risk losing puss to traffic as we have just done, them running off and getting lost, someone stealing or being excessively cruel to them. An indoor cat is a safe cat, and probably a much longer living cat, and I certainly don't think that it is cruel. It's just matter of what suits and what the cat is used to.

Dogs are easier to farm out as they generally stick by you and are walked on a lead. Cats are too independent, and I wouldn't dream of taking mine anywhere other than a licensed cattery. Slightly off subject, I think that keeping cats as house cats, inside all the time, is cruel, cats are designed to climb trees, roam the countryside/suburban gardens, hunt and do cat things, although I do understand that there is always the worry with breeds such as bengals (beautiful) and such, that they will be catnapped. I have always had straight forward moggies from rescue centres so dont have that worry!

Latest:- D.D rang up while I was walking the dog! OH had to tell her the glad tidings, and of course floods of tears, but no blame attributed, thank God! She said that she took the risk and it was not our fault. Poor OH was in tears as was I, AGAIN!! Her 'chap' is coming over on Saturday to collect the survivors, which will save us a journey and having to face the grandchildren! (coward - me!) so at least they will be gone fairly soon!

Best of luck niggle Bound to be tears and she may blame you for a while, although you of course are not to blame, but this time next year - it will all be in perspective I am sure.

You're right Shysal, D.D returns on Saturday, late at night so I won't hear from her till Sunday. I have been practising what I shall say, it's a good thing I didn't speak to her yesterday as I might have gone a bit over the top, but a couple of days calm reflection should mean that I am able to tell them and say how sorry we are (which is true!!), but on the other hand not wear a hair shirt - I'm not looking forward to it. We only lost our little spaniel in March (to cancer) and now this! But having cross words won't help, in fact, make a bad situation worse, so we will try to avoid them if possible. Thank you for the suggestions! at the moment little boy is asleep, but when he wakes I shall try and set up some sort of games for him.

My Bengal's favourite plaything is a small bottle top from a Fruit Shoot. she flicks it all over the place. My job is to retrieve it from under furniture. Her next best choice is a torch beam which I shine onto the floor to be chased.
You will be pleased when DD has returned! I hope you will be able to apologise without being too defensive. Harsh words will not alter the circumstances which you will make sure are not repeated.

That's why I stopped having cats. I was worried sick whenever they went out and when I started having oriental house cats I was a wreck with worrying where in the house they were; had a window been left open or hot water put into a bath before cold etc etc. My first Burmese escaped just once and was run over that evening and another one died quite young [7] never having had any freedom but being desperate to go outside. I wouldn't never have asked anyone to look after them [even at their own home] as they're so different to 'normal' cats, they seem to have no road sense whatsoever [they even have a habit of getting into peoples cars if the doors are left open]. All of my curtains were in shreds as well . I did love them, but, never again.

Thankyou all for your posts. You are quite right Deeedaa, they SHOULD have gone to cat kennels, and I should have been firm and said NO!. D.D can well afford it, and as our son said, she shouldn't have put this on us. She was such a sweet little girl and we both feel gutted. One thing little boy won't be coming to stay again!! This morning he is yowling and crying, has run up the curtains(!!) and being hells delight to keep amused! I'm just hoping that if I play with him (any ideas?!!) he will tire and go to sleep!!
Over the years we have lost other cats on different roads, so I was well aware of the dangers even of a quiet road, and I asked D.D if she could buy them a harness each (they wear collars) so that I could take them out in safety! but no! I was clearly fussing, and this is the result. This casual attitude of D.D's has cost that little cat her life which is so sad. No I won't tell them till they are back (on Saturday). It would ruin the kids holiday and I don't want to do that.

I know this was perhaps impractical, but could you not have stayed at your DD's house while she was away. That being said, the cat could have had the same accident at home. We had friends who lived beside a main road and a succession of cats (children's pets) met the same fate. Eventually my friend began lying to her children, tellng them that the cat ran away rather than distress then again. They had no more cats after that.

Cats are their own people. They are used to going out and your DD would have expected you to carry on with that. Trying to keep them in would have been impossible for three weeks - getting past you and out of the door would have become their challenge in life.
Anyone who owns a cat and let's it have it's freedom lives with the knowledge that something nasty may befall them. If you can't cope with that - you have a dog!

This is so sad. niggly, but you did your best for the animals, try not to beat yourself up over it. I don't envy you breaking the news. .
I would have found 3 weeks of keeping cats in impossible, especially Bengals, I can only imagine the noise!
I recently had orders from the Vet to keep in my moggie, but after he scratched his paws raw on the cat flap for a few hours I let him out! My Bengal was even worse a few years ago when she had a leg in a thick bandage after slipping in the snow, and I was told to keep her in a cage. I couldn't stand the noise for long and soon freed her, whereupon she managed to get onto her usual perch on top of the wardrobe!

Oh dear , that is sad, but a hazard of cat ownership, I dont think you can be expected to keep them in- but don't tell them until they get back !

Oh niggly everybody's nightmare! I think three weeks is a long time to look after someone else's animals - especially Bengals, which are hardly ordinary cats. I spent last week going in to feed DD's cat every day and that was really long enough! I mustn't complain too much as I will be needing DD and DS to come and feed our four for a week next month.
Part of me does feel that someone who can afford Bengals should be able to pay three weeks kennel fees, but that may just be jealousy on my part.

Poor you, niggly. DD will be back from her hols tomorrow. I've been looking after her two dogs and a cat for two weeks. They've all been very good but it's such a responsibility.

Good luck.

That's exactly what our son said! But I tend to be a pushover and let myself in for things I don't really want to do. After this I won't be having cats at all. I just can't accept the responsibility. I shall, rosearered, take the bull by the horns and tell it as it was, there is nothing else I can do. thanks for your reply.

I don't think you should have had to look after them in the first place. That's what catteries are for.You told her it would be difficult for you, and it has been.Just tell the unvarnished truth. You did your best, but the cat got out.I won't look after my DD's cat for more than a few days.

Depends on whether or not she asked you to keep them in or not. It's very difficult keeping cats in all the time; I had years of doing that with the oriental cats we had, and that was with having a cat pen built for them.