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What should I Do?

(28 Posts)
Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 12:37:46

I have always had two or three dogs for many a year, first time since my grandpa bought me my first puppy when I was fourteen do I now have one. B

When my beloved honey died a month ago I was devasted. I decided I was too old to buy another puppy. It was arrange with younger daughter years ago if I died my dogs would go to her, she adores dogs , has three , lives in the wilds of Lincolnshire , a two acre garden and is waiting to buy a field behind their house, she doesn't work.

When staying with me this month she said I need a puppy - when I put on weight ! My brother has told her he thinks I should have another dog, said my home was empty without dogs around me. My son in law( who isn't) has told me to get a puppy,if I was to end up in hospital with a broken leg he would be around for my dogs and care for them. My two son in laws have said I should.

I have a dog walker, there are two puppy and dog crèches here, the vet is five minutes away

I really can't decide if it would be selfish , every chance it and Lottie could outlive me, Lottie is six.

I don't want a rescue dog ,it may not work with Lottie

Help and be brutally honest please ?

This has nothing to do with the death of my daughter, Honey died about a month before and the conversations started when Honey died.

kittylester Sat 18-Nov-17 12:39:53

It seems cut and dried to me - get a puppy, you know you want to really. grin Seriously, I think you should.

merlotgran Sat 18-Nov-17 12:44:50

The only negative is the hard work involved in a puppy's training. If you are up to that then I would go ahead.

BlueBelle Sat 18-Nov-17 13:02:23

Why a puppy why not a fully trained, calmed down a wee bit older dog Annie it wouldn’t necessarily be bad for your other dog
When my cat got killed I thought I d get a kitten to keep my other cat company ( not straight a way but soon after) she hated it, got really messed up with it’s playfullness and was really grumpy was hissing and cuffing it I gave it time to settle down but she never got used to it the got really violent and I had to find the kitten a new home in the end

Cherrytree59 Sat 18-Nov-17 13:20:17

There is a little furry animal out there just waiting to be given a warm home, bed and food.
In return he/she will love you unconditionally.
and maybe pee on the

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 14:22:39

Cherry, maybe is rather optimistic, I will settle for will definitely .

BlueBelle, I did think of it but decided no for several reasons. A rescued dog does not need the possibility of being rehomed again, the dog wouldn't know but I would, I can't do guilt and my elder daughter started a rescue and rehoming charity some years ago , still going strong . So many had problems and selfish I know but this home needs laughter .

Merlot, I have house trained fifteen puppies, twelve I kept until they died, three my daughters borrowed but never gave back. My physiotherapist tells me to walk around the house frequently, I get absorbed with GN or scrabble and forget too move off the sofa for hours,

kitty, yes I want one but often this has been discussed on GN and I am unsure. Truth is I long for one and to see Lottie react in which ever way she does is better that her sleeping most of the time.

Christinefrance Sat 18-Nov-17 14:44:14

I would wait a while before making a decision Annie you have had such a lot of upheaval and sadness in your life recently its not the best time for this.

A new dog may help occupy you but you also need to think of the puppy's future, you know its a big commitment.

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 14:49:33

Christine, I will not make any decision until i put on a stone in weight, if it was just for me without thought for the dog I could decide now. But thinking about it is something to think about , a future .

Crafting Sat 18-Nov-17 16:15:32

Could I ask, would a puppy put any restrictions on your day to day activities? i.e do you have commitments that would cause the puppy to be alone for hours or, stop you doing things because you had to be at home with the puppy?

Lottie is only 6 which means she is not too old and could do with someone to play with. How does Lottie get on with other dogs generally?

How much weight do you need to put on before you could get a puppy (don't mean to be personal) ?

Do you have a garden that the dogs could play in without you having to tale them for a walk?

Final question, what sort of puppy are you going to get? grin

merlotgran Sat 18-Nov-17 16:24:29

I thought Lottie was an old dog - thinking back to the post you wrote when Honey died, Anniebach. I must have got that wrong.

Can you not just focus on Lottie while you are still in a period of grief and recovery?

Telly Sat 18-Nov-17 17:14:01

I see you dont want a rescue, but what about considering an older dog whose owner can no longer care for it? Much less work than a puppy. If you do decide to get another dog then perhaps contact local rescues and discuss with them what your specific requirements you have. You can always say no, but surely worth a try, bearing in mind all you have to offer.

midgey Sat 18-Nov-17 17:31:06

Anniebach.....just go and get a puppy! The only problem you have is....what breed!

Jalima1108 Sat 18-Nov-17 18:25:10

I got our last dog from a kennels (not breeding kennels) because his owner, who was very elderly, had died and he had been in there for several weeks while the family decided what to do about him. He was a young dog rather than a puppy at the time and had been a bit spoilt, but was very intelligent and soon adapted to our household.

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 19:10:04

Lottie could be bullied, she had two Mums with my two Westies, she may want the Mum role now, all my other dogs have mothered my new puppies .two adult dogs brings the risk of the need to be top dog. B

Crafting, I have to put on a stone .

I have retired from political and charity work , don't go on site now so have no need to venture far from the bungalow, I will not go into town again, have my garden, quite large, lawn and three paved areas, we play ball there. If something cropped up and I had to leave for a couple of hours there is the crèche and there is a retired vetinary nurse who will dog sit in the home.

I am content at home with dogs and have a dog walker for Lottie. I love dogs far too much to put my needs before theirs😀

Bathsheba Sat 18-Nov-17 19:58:48

I think you're wise to wait till you've gained some weight. You will feel a little stronger and more able to cope with the demands of a puppy then. In the meantime the decision to get one will give you a focus in your life and a reason to do your utmost to get some nourishment inside you.
I wish you all the best in this new venture Annie. You're clearly wonderful with dogs and having two of them to keep each other - and you - company will go a long way to making you feel your life is little more normal.

Jalima1108 Sat 18-Nov-17 20:18:14

I think, if it was me, I would wait a little while then opt for a female dog, not a male who may want to be 'top dog'.

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 20:28:37

If I do it will be a girl and it will be some time, a stone is a lot of weight to gain

Jalima1108 Sat 18-Nov-17 20:40:56

Did you ask for any tips on Jane Clarke's thread, Anniebach?

She may have some ideas

Willow500 Sat 18-Nov-17 21:43:09

I know you don't want a rescue dog for the various reasons you've said - mainly that it might affect Lottie but equally a pup might be too much for her to handle too. As your daughter started the rescue centre do the staff there know you? I wondered if you'd be able to take Lottie round and introduce her to possible buddies to find out how she would get on with any of them. The time to do this obviously has to be when you've put on some weight and I agree that it would be very difficult to send one back after giving it a new home. My FIL did this - the dog was devoted to him as soon as he arrived but he tripped over him and broke his wrist a few weeks later and as he was terminally ill (FIL) he said he couldn't cope. We knew nothing about it until it was all done but my BIL who had to take the poor dog back was very upset. There are so many older dogs out there looking for new homes -some who have been in care for so long. We have had 3 wonderful rescue dogs over the years - one was 7 when she came to us - they gave us many years of love and devotion. There is no rush to make a decision though - the main thing at the moment is for you to get your strength back and gain that weight. I'd gladly give you some of mine if it was possible smile

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 21:46:30

And I would gladly accept it. Think I tried too hard today, feel sick 😢

Willow500 Sat 18-Nov-17 22:05:26

It's probably a cumulation of all you've been through Annie and exhaustion from lack of sleep. Try to have an early night. I do hope you manage to get some better sleep tonight x

Anniebach Sat 18-Nov-17 22:27:08

Perhaps cut back a bit on trying to eat much more 😀, take it more slowly. Thank you x

pensionpat Sat 18-Nov-17 22:59:42

I think you've made your decision. After all, you have a doggy vacancy! It's just about the timing.

Anniebach Sun 19-Nov-17 09:12:07

I should not have started this thread, so sorry.

It is never going to happen

MawBroon Sun 19-Nov-17 09:23:10

There are also rescue puppies where a pregnant bitch has come in - so a puppy and a rescue dog need not be mutually exclusive.
You will know in your heart Anniebach