When to let my old cat go..?

Blubber Please let her go. The fact that she is losing weight rapidly now suggests the end is very near. Please let it be painless, peaceful and quick for her. She'll just slip away in your arms, and although it will be very hard on you, you'll know it was the right decision. You and she have loved each other for so long, don't fail her now. Thinking of you and wishing you courage

grannygranby you have been very fortunate that your pets have died peacefully and comfortably, however some pets would have a slow, lingering and possibly painful demise which we would not wish for them.

I'm so sorry Blubbering that you are overwhelmed by all this sadness at once - it must be terrible.
The only positive I can bring is that it is a privilege to be able to put an animal to sleep instead of making them carry on as we do with humans. I'm sure that puss has had a lovely life with you but it looks like it is time to say goodbye.

I read another forum once and someone said this and it has stayed with me. ' It's better to let them go a day too early, than a day too late '

It is so hard. I lost my Dad in March and my old Labrador had to be pts the day after my Dad's funeral. Her time had come and it was the kindest thing to do. The vet came out to us and she went to sleep at home in her comfortable place with us all round her. You will make the right decision for your cat.

Oh I do sympathise. My last cat died very suddenly a number of years ago but I still shed a tear when I remember her.
If it's any comfort, although I'm not fey in any way, unexpectedly DH and I both still saw her in the garden from time to time, even visiting grandchildren remarked on it, without our having said anything, and no neighbouring cats came into the garden.
As time has passed her shade had faded and now other cats come to visit, but it was a comfort for a year or three

At one point I ended up as the crazy cat lady and had twelve cats. Unfortunately only one of them died in her sleep, every other one of them I had to take to PTS when they got too sick. The last of them was two weeks ago. It's a horrible decision to have to make but was all very calm and peaceful.

How I feel for you, I really do. Our pets are our family. I echo the words of others, be kind to her and let her go. Three of our cats have died over the past five years or so. All aged 14 years. Our Daisy-May had fluid on the lungs and had trouble breathing and had medication. We took her to the vet for her check up two weeks later early evening and the vet was concerned that not enough air was getting to her lungs, brought her home and she died that night on my bedroom floor. Our Rio had the same complaint but with liver problems as well and was on medication for a year. the vet was amazed that he had lived so long. But then he started to have difficulty breathing and was out of breath and could hardly walk. I slept on the sofa for two nights with him knowing I had got to have him put to sleep but I couldn't do it. Looking back, I was thinking of me because I didn't want to lose him. We loved him more than words can say, but I should have let him go. I was in tears as I phoned the vet in the morning and asked for the vet to come to my house to put him to sleep. The biggest advice I can give you is if you do this, please tell the receptionist not to tell you the time they will arrive I was told the time and I think that was the worst thing ever, clock watching, and the nearer the time the worse I got.
Our other cat Biscuit I adopted when she was 12 years old when a relative died. We had her for two years. I noticed that she had slight breathing problems and she started to hide herself away behind our tv cabinet and behind a wardrobe or under the bed. She stopped eating. We took her to the vet and to cut a story short, we decided to have her put to sleep.
There is no suffering and you can talk to your cat and stroke her and she'll go to sleep within what seems to be a couple of seconds.
I'm so sad that you're going through such an emotional time and my thoughts are with you. Hugs

So sorry to hear of the loss of your father and you need to allow yourself as much time as it takes to grieve for him. It's such a stressful time for you but having your cat euthanized is the kindest thing you can do given her deteriorating condition. You see how much support you have on here. It will be hard for you but not for her, she will slip away more peacefully and be at perfect rest. You can concentrate on your dog and I'm sure he will continue to give you love, devotion and companionship. Best wishes

It is an awful decision to make. Did it with our ancient beloved dog. But his end was so peaceful, us with him. I wished I could choose the same when my time comes. Wishing you hugs and love.

Blubberingmesscantde...
Of course it isn't selfish nor is your post 'waffle'.
GN is here for everything and everyone no matter how serious or frivolous and your post sits at neither extreme but it is important and meaningful to you, and that is what matters.
I don't have pets but I do realise that they are beloved by their families and you have the unenviable double whammy of losing your father and your companion.
I feel sure, as a loving, caring owner, that'll you know when enough is enough for your furry friend and let her slip into sleep, perhaps in your arms.
Don't be afraid to cry.
Remember, we are here to listen, console and support so that you can live with the happy memories and, in time, possibly give a loving home to another companion.
I wish you all the very best. ?

Please let her go. There is no point in hanging on to her when she is obviously suffering and at the end of her life. You have to be brave. It’s so hard, but you must put her first as there is no hope of her getting better and she has had a good long life. If you know your vet well, he will make it as easy on you as possible. We have been through this with several cats over the years and it doesn't get any easier, but you have to put their needs first, however difficult it is.

I agree so much with what Hellsbelles said & what a vet also said to me when I asked the vet to come to my house for one of my dogs. So important not to leave it too long, even a day too long can leave an unhappy memory for ever. It's always less stressful for your pet if the vet can come to you - & for you as well. I have 4 Rough Collies, a Poodle & a cat buried in my garden & have planted a special bush or plant above each one. That helped bring me a little peace, especially when I tend to each one. Sending you such good luck & love. x

I’m so sorry to hear about your cat. My old cat was 20 1/2 and the vet had said that she was really poorly and nothing could be done at her age it wasn’t fair to her. He came to our house, sedated her so that she was calm, then put her to sleep. It was so calm and peaceful, much nicer that taking them to the clinical surgery. It costs a bit more but well worth it. Try to think of the lovely life you gave her and the lovely life she gave you. ❤️❤️

We have always had cats - and all much loved. Trust your instincts as your vet has said and don't let the suffering go on longer than you have to. We made a big mistake with one of ours who became very ill; trying to keep him going for 3 months longer than we should have because we couldn't bear to lose him. We only made things worse for him.
Do what you feel is right - and in due course, when you can, think about giving a home to another cat who would appreciate one - and appreciate you, too.

When you find yourself asking strangers, "When should I let my old cat go?", then you have already answered your own question - and the answer is "NOW!"

You know that in your heart.

Blubberingmesscantdeal - it's hard, it's horrible, and it's incredibly sad, but as pet owners we have to trust our instincts and know when the time has arrived to say goodbye to our beloved animals - it is the last act of love we can give them and the last thing any of us would want is to allow needless suffering. Thinking of you at this sad time.

Oh I do feel for you. My beloved cat was 17 when I had to make such a decision. She had steadily deteriorated but was still eating and enjoying sitting in the sunshine and having a fuss. I took her to the vet at one point thinking it was the right time to let her go as she had had a couple of 'funny turns', but after a conversation brought her home again and enjoyed a few more precious weeks. She had heart failure and I had to take her as an emergency in the middle of the night in the end as she was struggling to breathe and there was no other option. Coming home to an empty house with an empty cat carrier in my hand was awful, but as with all those we love we have to do what's best for them and none of us want to see them suffer. It will be very hard for you having lost your father too, and you will be heartbroken but you will do the right thing. Hugs to you.

A friend had a dog that developed cancer, she said she couldn't afford to pay to have it pts so that poor animal must have been in so much pain, but of course that friend could still afford her cigarettes! Was it karma when I heard that she had had cancer herself!
Sorry to hear of your poor cat but you know that if your cat is ill then it's her pain you must consider, not your feelings, I wish you well

So sorry to hear of your turmoil, B. It's a difficult time for you especially after losing your Dad recently. Whatever and whenever you decide, your cat will know she is loved

Yes, Karma, Maggieanne
She could have found a charity vet: PDSA is the UK's leading vet charity, providing free and low-cost treatment to pets in need.
She didn't bother to find out. I'm a smoker but I would give up anything for my pets. What a heartless woman she is.

So sorry to hear this. I know how painful it is. But I agree with other posters that if you make the decision now, you will be able to be with her as she goes gently.

Please please let her go- you know the tie has come.

If you can afford it, ask the vet to come to your home. It is so hard- hugs.

It's now three days since your post Blubberingmess. I'd like to know the outcome. If the cat is still with you, are you familiar with the subtle signs of pain in cats, such as increased purring?

www.preventivevet.com/cats/how-can-i-tell-if-my-cat-is-in-pain

My gorgeous cat Rosie was 18 and a half and told me it was time for her to go. She wasn't in pain or suffering, just really old and getting frail, so we took the decision to allow her to die at home if possible. Bless her, she spent one last night on my lap and then passed away in the night in her bed looking content. Buried in our garden under a rose (Rosie) bush. I feel for you, it's so sad when pets die. They really are part of your family. We got another cat after a year being "catless" and you do eventually move on. Chin up eh.