Serious cat dilemma

I had a cat that used certain areas of the house as a toilet. Vet told me to leave just the smallest amount of food in all the places cat went. They will never pee or poop near their food. It worked.
However sounds like in this situation rehoming cat 2 is the only option. Neither cat is probably very happy as things stand

A cat behaviourist is probably the way forward. The vet is probably right and progress is going to be slow but it can be done by going back to basics. There are homeopathic remedies if it is stress related.

KaazaK I've used that idea re food with a previous cat we had. It worked well with her but was pretty straightforward as she always 'went' in the same place.
In this case the poor cat is spraying all over the place most usually on fabrics eg pile of ironing or a silk shirt hanging on a door handle. It seems so random. Any place, anywhere, any time.
I stayed for a week last year when the family were away and it never happened then. Both cats were around. That's got me thinking. What else has changed since last summer? Am off to ponder. Will discuss bladder problems with DD although vet said no problem.

The family were away and it didn’t happen. Are any family members teasing or tormenting the cat?

Euthanise!!!
Is that what you'd do if children didn't along ?
How cruel to even think of it

If you have to, rehome the second cat NOT the first one. He obviously doesn't like her and is deeply unhappy.

Bach Flower Remedies can be used on animals quite easily and I think they may help this particular cat.If you want to contact me privately op ,I can make some suggestions of appropriate remedies.I also have a book called. Cures for Crazy cats which has some helpful suggestions,I have used both options on rescue cats I have owned.

JdotJ I can only assume you haven't read the thread.
GSM I really don't think the others tease him or are cruel. Eldest DGS in particular loves animals and especially cats which makes cat 1's behaviour even more puzzling. However, cat 1 won't have anything to do with him these days. It's quite hurtful.
The only people cat 1 tolerates is DD and me.

I’m beginning to wonder if the first cat would be happier in a home with just one woman?

Me too!

I didn’t think it was fair to rehome the first cat but now I think it’s the right solution for him. He just might not be able to cope with the noise and disruption that comes with family life any more, he’s stressed and just wants peace and quiet, preferably with a lady owner who can give him her undivided attention. I hope that can be found for him.

How old are the boys?

Smell is very important to cats so perhaps it's their smell or the clothes smell that he doesn't like rather than cat 2.

Elegran

LRavenscroft

Aveline

Here's the cuprit

Where I live he would be re=homed in a heart beat by our very competent animal shelter where homes and owners are thoroughly checked and vetted before being allowed to move in. Disgusting to suggest 'euthanasia'. I am truly shocked. Go to your nearest Cat Protection and get the poor fellow rehomed and loved.

Oh for crying out loud! Come doon aff your cuddy down off your high horse of righteous outrage. No-one has suggested euthanasia . Some posters have said the truth - that banishment and then rehoming could seem a worse fate to a not-so-young cat who has spent many years in one home and then had to share it with a confident interloper than quietly going to sleep in peace.

The OP brushed on the distant possibility that if nothing else worked her daughter might have to consider. "Re-home? Euthanise? Both seem too radical . . ." That reads to me like strong distaste for either course, but recognition of the situation.

Au contraire! I shall remain on my high horse and shout from the roof tops. Why was a new kitten brought into the home in the first place? For human delight! Because they wanted another cat? Did no one think of the older cat and how he would react? Aveline has even put a photo up and written 'Here is the culprit'. Shocking. He is not the culprit. The culprits are the humans. The rag doll is a cat for goodness sake and also a living being with feelings. Someone has to speak out on behalf of the animals as they don't have a voice themselves and the only way they can express themselves is through their behaviour. THINK before you act is my motto. Shame on you all and shocking to even have the word 'euthanise' expressed as a 'distant possibility'. Cat lovers? I don't think so!!!

What’s done is done. Hopefully lessons have been learned. There’s no point in ranting now, and after all the OP didn’t bring this situation about. As I have said above, and I think Aveline agrees, there is a way forward for the first cat which will give him the quiet and happy life he seems to need. As do many of us. At his age I would hope he has at least another ten years of happiness ahead of him though in my experience pedigree cats aren’t always as long lived as ‘moggies’. They are, though, particularly sensitive souls and need to be treated accordingly.

The very first response by Lauren59 is absolutely correct. No euthanasia!

We know the cat1 #1 is stressed - and in my mind has squatter’s rights and he was the first loved cat. Let him live out his life in peace.

I vote cat #2 go to another loving home. But one or the other has to be rehomed.
😿😿😿
USA Gundy

Aveline - you say that he's happy enough with the neighbourhood cats but are you sure there's nothing else in the garden at night? Fox? Badger? Something has set him off and a predator such as a fox could be enough. Any chance of setting up an outdoor/security camera to see what - if anything - is happening outside?
Other thing I wondered - you said this wasn't happening previously - were your daughter/husband working from home and have now returned to work? If the dynamic of the household has changed that could also be part of his issue.

The answer is - I don't know! Re getting a new kitten : lots of people get new cats either as kittens or rehomed adults and integration doesn't lead to these behaviours.
It must be wonderful to know exactly how any decision will work out in the future or that life is a completely black and white situation. Of course people like that don't understand irony eg calling that dear wee cat 'the culprit'.
Thanks to Grans who have made useful practical suggestions. They're all being passed on. I won't be passing on the blame being happily applied to this sad situation.

I'd still get a second opinion from another vet - it could be physical rather than stress.

Re the post about smells - that is a good point as cats dislike citrussy smells and if the men in the family are using shower gels etc that the cat dislikes, then he will avoid them.]

Perhaps the female cat isn't so fussy.

Has there been a change of laundry detergent of softener? You say that the peeing is mostly on fabrics - piles of clean washing, soft toys, pillows.

Callistemon21

I'd still get a second opinion from another vet - it could be physical rather than stress.

Re the post about smells - that is a good point as cats dislike citrussy smells and if the men in the family are using shower gels etc that the cat dislikes, then he will avoid them.]

Perhaps the female cat isn't so fussy.

Good post.

Sorry I mentioned piles of ironing etc as that was what seemed almost worse to me but he'll pee on anything!
I'll be seeing them over the weekend and we'll be discussing everything.

The book I mentioned, readily available on World of Books or ebay Aveline.

Relevant Bach Flowers.2or 3 drops in water or on food.
Good luck with it all,I hope for a happy outcome for all.

Could you have one?

Soniah: do read the thread!