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Dog owners, could I ask your advice, please?

(35 Posts)
grandtanteJE65 Sun 15-May-22 15:52:59

We don't have a dog, although both DH and I actually like them.

Our neighbours do. The elder lady has two small dogs that yap incessantly, which we try to ignore. Her adult daughter who lives in flat below the mother has frequently said to me that she finds her mother's ill trained little dogs annoying.

Now the young woman has acquired a young dog (not a puppy, a bitch that has obviously had a litter not too long ago). This dog barks when in the garden with her owner, but stops when told to. But and here is what I need your advice about, this dog has started howling when her owner is not at home.

Should I mention this to the owner (on the assumption that she cannot know what is happening when she is out ´, as the dog quietens down when she hears the car in the drive, or will I simply be seen as an interfering so-and-so if I say anything?

MayBee70 Sun 15-May-22 16:02:04

She needs to be told. The dog obviously has separation anxiety which is not good for the dog.

MayBee70 Sun 15-May-22 16:03:20

Just point out that you are concerned about separation anxiety not that you’re complaining otherwise she might go on the defensive…..

BeEmerald Sun 15-May-22 16:25:59

MayBee70 is spot on. It’s separation anxiety and it is in the dog’s best interests to tell her.

Urmstongran Sun 15-May-22 16:53:07

I agree - it’s distressing for the dog ... and the neighbours!

Urmstongran Sun 15-May-22 17:29:21

And if you don’t mention it (kindly, it’s not her fault) then she won’t get to be aware about it.

Chardy Sun 15-May-22 17:37:38

Take some dog treats round to her, ask how her new dog is getting on, then tell her.

MrsPickle Sun 15-May-22 17:39:29

Agree on all above.
Plus someone may tell the council, with all that entails.
There are lots of things she can try, from daycare, to playing the radio and remote cameras etc. but if she doesn't know, it won't get fixed.

Blondiescot Sun 15-May-22 17:52:02

Totally agree with MayBee70 - definitely sounds like separation anxiety and there's not really any other way she's going to know. Better to hear it from someone like yourself who can phrase it in such a way that she's not likely to take offence than having someone simply report it to the council or police.

MayBee70 Sun 15-May-22 18:04:57

Might be worth suggesting to the neighbour that a dap diffuser might help. They release pheromones which help to calm the dog down.

Joseanne Sun 15-May-22 18:39:06

My nearest neighbour told me this very thing a few weeks ago. She put it a nice way, saying, "It sounds like you have a dinosaur in there!" 🦕

Audi10 Tue 17-May-22 18:15:36

She must be told as it’s not nice for the dog very distressing and obviously the neighbours won’t be impressed to hear the poor dog howling!

LaCrepescule Tue 17-May-22 20:04:01

I’m a dog owner and would definitely want to be told if a neighbour was hearing my poor dog howl when I wasn’t there. You’d be doing the right thing in telling her.

Iam64 Tue 17-May-22 21:07:10

Yes, tell the owner. Separation anxiety is awful for the dog and won’t disappear without expert advice for the owner.
Has this poor bitch been over bred from? If she’s been a puppy farm bitch she will have had a tough time

lilypollen Tue 17-May-22 21:46:05

We have had 2 rescues for 15 months. One has separation anxiety and in the early days howled when left. Our son bought us Licki mats - check online. You smear cream cheese/unsalted peanut butter/yogurt on them. Keeps them occupied and they are then calmed down. It has to be accepted that when a dog has had a previous life they will experience issues when rehomed. Now our two get excited when the mats come out so worth suggesting.

Mollygo Tue 07-Jun-22 18:30:48

This has probably been asked before but before I make a decision, would you have your dog spayed or not? We’ve no intention of breeding from her.

Mollygo Tue 07-Jun-22 18:37:02

Sorry, wrong thread.

NotSpaghetti Wed 08-Jun-22 14:57:39

My neighbour has a lovely, friendly dog. He is really delightful but howls and barks whenever he's left alone.
It makes me really sad and makes my husband very very uptight and cross. We can't eat in the kitchen if he's howling because of the distress.
He's better in the summer as he goes outside where he has a lovely big kennel and space to wander and explore a bit.
His owner says "I can't do anything about it" - which I think is unfair - and wrong because every time we complain she has her son come over to work at home with him for a few weeks while she's working or her daughter pops in to see him during the day. Then slowly it drifts back and we have to complain again. She always implies that we are the problem and sighs a lot.
It makes me sad to hear him. He barked till he was hoarse last autumn.
I hope you have more luck.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 08-Jun-22 17:02:31

I would report the neighbour to the local authority and the RSPCA notspaghetti. She's been told there's a problem. Separation anxiety. Why people have dogs when they go out to work is beyond me. We had cats until one of us was wfh. Please report it, for the dog's sake. He is very unhappy.

Iam64 Thu 09-Jun-22 08:49:34

That’s so sad Notspaghetti, poor dog and rotten for you to hear how distressed he is. I’ve not much confidence the RSPCA will take effective action. Id still contact them and your dog warden.
It’s shocking that so many people bought lock down puppies with no idea what sharing your life with a dog involves.

Germanshepherdsmum Thu 09-Jun-22 08:54:33

I‘ve been looking at rescue GSDs online with a view to adopting another. The number of 1-2 year olds is heartbreaking. Obviously lockdown puppies. And that’s just one breed, in a small area of the country.

Dee1012 Thu 09-Jun-22 11:23:08


I‘ve been looking at rescue GSDs online with a view to adopting another. The number of 1-2 year olds is heartbreaking. Obviously lockdown puppies. And that’s just one breed, in a small area of the country.

I've just taken in a puppy.... bought by someone for 'children', when he mouthed and nibbled as puppies do, he was locked out in the garden permanently!
He's a beautiful little thing but absolutely scared stiff - it infuriates me!

Germanshepherdsmum Thu 09-Jun-22 11:37:26

How awful. He’s come to a good home now. The GSD I hope to meet next week spent her life chained up outside.

Caleo Thu 09-Jun-22 11:42:53

Some years ago I was worried about the welfare of next door's puppy . My daughter in law had the following good idea.

Pretend you have found an old book of yours about dog care that addresses these problems. (You don't have such a book but can easily buy a suitably used looking book from an amazon seller for a few pence). If the neighbour is bit stupid a child's book may be best.

You innocently go to the woman's door and say you found this old book of yours and thought as a dog lover she might enjoy it. You could also give her a cake of a flower from your garden.

NotSpaghetti Thu 09-Jun-22 11:55:18

Yes, GSM and Iam I have looked at this "formal" route a lot. It's maybe more complicated than I may have explained though as he's an old dog who used to have someone with him all day (working at home) but since a family breakup he can be left alone according to the shift patterns of his owner who is a nurse.

I think I just need to go over more often to complain. Stiff words to self to toughen up! I suppose she's hostile about it because she knows I'm right.
Maybe I need to go over every time it happens. I do know it would break his heart to be removed - but I do also hate to hear him so miserable.