what's the worst personal comment you have received from a person ?

My daughter, having passed the stage of telling me that I dress too young for my age, now uses "unspoken comments" as in raised eyebrows and eyes heavenwards (= do not approve), a long look up and down followed by a nod (= approval).

Can't argue with that but it gives me some angst when I see her in order to try and conform to her ideas of "dressing my age". So what if I currently like block prints and have a few "on the knee - possibly just above the knee if truth be told - dresses? These fashion faux-pas in her eyes are countered by two maxi dresses and a couple of maxi skirts which I am sure will get the thumbs down when I see her. Then there are the in betweens if I ever feel like being a demure 64 year old.

Fortunately, (unfortunately really), I don't see my daughter and twin grandsons as often as I should like as they live in Surrey while we live in Newcastle upon Tyne.

I got a 'double-sided' compliment yesterday when I was out with my granddaughter (20). I picked up a brilliantly coloured 'purplely' Indian print dress/top in a shop and she said, 'Treat yourself, Grandma, it's lovely!' I asked her if she didn't think it was a bit young for me and she replied that I should never worry about things like that, and I should wear what I fancied. Cheered up by that I held it up against me and said, 'Do you think it'll be big enough, though?'......She replied, 'Of course, Grandma - it's massive!' I bought it, and it fitted just fine!

, GMG, I think your GD has a lot in common with mine who is my style 'guru'. Has been since she was about eleven and most of her choices have been spot on. Now she is studying fashion!

The shop assistant who said of my 'three years younger than I' sister 'How nice to have your daughter to help you shop'. Thanks a lot!! My sister was very chuffed, so someone was happy.

The incredulous 'what - you???' when I passed my 11 plus, and the ongoing comments denying my intelligence, including 'well you know where you got your brains from, don't you?' from my mother, when I got my degree. Giving me credit just once would have been nice.

'We always thought you were a bit thick", by a well-meaning (?) aunt. I didn't enquire who the 'we' were, but had a fairly good idea.

I received my MSc. in 1997.

I was, as the youngsters say ... 'beyond happy'.

Carol - It does spur you on though, doesn't it!

I went to a fancy dress party when I was about 30, as "a lady of the night". Loads of makeup,tarty dress,fishnets, ankle chain etc, and some bloke asked "Have you just come as yourself?" Mortified!

Yes, Butternut it did spur me on, and I gave up sharing my academic achievements with parents in later life - didn't see the point of putting myself in the firing line for more insults.

When I was about 20 a visiting aunt looked at me sadly and said ' You used to be such a pretty child' !!!

Yes dorset, but did you have on goth makeup, or similar, at the time?

I have messy hair, sort of curly sort of wavy does it's own think - sisters had long blond hair which always looked tidy. At least 2 teachers said to me "have you combed your hair today". I could have combed my hair every 5 minutes and it would still have looked a mess. Managed to burn my neck in the 60's trying to straighten it with an iron. Thank goodness for the tools we have today but I am still paranoid about my hair.

One friend of the family told my sister how pretty she was, looked at me pityingly and said "oh well at least your clever"! I have never forgotten that and how I longed to be called attractive. Sister has since told me that quite damaged her as she felt it meant she was stupid.

I made a faux par with my GS, he was a big baby and would never have been taken as a girl. I said when holding him one day "good thing you are a boy because you would be a very funny girl" DiL was great she laughed but I know that in a way she was hurt. Grandson is now a very handsome young man, who has modelled when not playing rugby or football.

I met a rather snooty type at a drinks partry who asked where we lived, on replying "Tooting" she wrinkled her pretty little nose and looked puzzled - her husband then chipped in "Oh yes, you remember, the place we went to the time we got lorst" - felt like telling them to"get lorst" too!
And when we moved to this village again a rather grand type said that she and her husband had looked at our (4 bed) house when they moved her "But of course it was far too small" - my DD on hearing this said "What?? For her ego?"

I met my very snooty neighbour at a hotel whilst on a business trip with my first husband. I had smiled at this women every time I met her coming out of the house or in the street,tried to be friendly. So when I saw her there, I walked up to her and introduced myself as her next door neighbour, she looked wrinkled her nose, and said "oh no I don't think so", I gave her the house number, and with a look of absolute horror on her face, turned to her husband and said"Oh darling, I'm afraid she is" and walked off!

That's priceless, GG .
Somehow, I don't think you wasted much time worrying about that ridiculous remark.

What have these people got to be snooty about ? Common courtesy costs nothing. How would she have felt if you had said to DH " oh look there's the snooty woman from next door "

Who do these people think they are,I've met many on my travel's and I alway's think and go back to my dear old dad's saying "If you don't eat you don't -- and if you don't -- you die" and that happen's to every one snooty or not.best word's he ever said was never ever forget where you come from and that has stood me well in my life,as no one is any better than I am.(must be having a soapbox day to-day)

Great,*glamma*, keep on the soap box, I love it.The Snooty one is no longer with us, and since she has gone(died), her husband has become a dear sweet old boy,willing to chat to everyone.

The night I met my husband, it was at a local dance hall, and I was there with a group of girls from work. He asked me out for the following night, and in the morning, at work, one of the girls, who really loved herself, asked me about him, and when I said I was going out with him that night, she said, "Really? I don`t know what he sees in you!"

I got my PhD two years before my bus pass - it took me 8 years of hard slog, especially having to get my head round new technology as it was developing. Fearing rude comments from mother and jealousy from older sister, I kept it quiet until I'd finished. Against my better judgment, I invited my mother to the degree ceremony. Her only comment when I arrived all begowned was "Your hair looks awful". I had been rather blase about the ceremony but absolutely loved it as there were only women getting PhDs and we led the procession out of the central double doors of Bath Abbey to be greeted by camera snapping tourists. I was putback in my place on the way home when the car broke down & we waited to be rescued in a ditch by the M4 for an hour - but it was warm and sunny & being in a ditch I could have a wee & nothing could spoil my day.

Congratulations on your PhD GadaboutGran. It truly does take years of slog, and to have that recognised in the ceremony must have been a very proud moment for you

Gadabout That sounds just like my Mum. Its always fatal for anyone to ask her 'How do I look?' The answer is always 'Who do you think's looking at you?!'

As soon as I started to earn money my father told me to save up for plastic surgery to have my nose shortened. I didn't but forever after saw a large nose every time I looked in the mirror ( a bit like an anorexic seeing a fat body)

Some 40 years later a girl I worked with told me she wished she had a small nose like mine! The damage parents do by unkind remarks can last a lifetime - my children are all truly beautiful and have always been told so.

I recently took my 18 month old Grandaughter to a local playground and was aware that a child of about 8years old on a climbing frame was observing me. She asked me if I was the little ones mother but before I could reply to her, she informed this 62 year old that I was 'very pretty but very old '!!

When I was 15 I did well in an exam and went home delighted and pleased. I told my paternal grandmother who looked at me and said 'Your trumpeter will not die of overwork' and crushed me completely.