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Support for family members cut out of loved ones lives 4

(1001 Posts)
celebgran Tue 03-Mar-15 15:22:38

Will this be ok any ideas welcome smileless and yogagirl please chip in.

Rhinestone Fri 13-Nov-15 10:36:55

Meant Ladies of London

Smileless2012 Fri 13-Nov-15 14:27:28

No, haven't seen that Rhinestone. It's a shame you can't go to Florida any sooner. I expect your husband is very upset that you've heard nothing about seeing Aidensadand not seeing his daughter when she was visiting near by. It is strange that she didn't have a spare 20 minutesconfusedand that must have hurt him too.

I often think it must be so hard for the dads/grand dads in this situation as women tend to get together to give and receive support and understanding, just like we do on here.

Yes, you should send cards. I get 2, one gets sent and the other is for his memory box which we've left to him in our wills so if we never get to see him again at least he'll know one day that he was loved by the grandparents he never knew. We'll do the same for the new baby toosad.

Sounds like you'll be having a wonderful time Yogagirl hope the weather is good and the wind doesn't upset your plans. DH will be 62 on Monday. No card as yet from Aus. I hope it gets here on time as it will make all the difference to him. I'm so thankful that we still have our DS and lovely d.i.l.. It must be awful if you're estranged from your only child/ren.

Watched 60 Minute Makeover this morning, don't know if it was an old one or not but the house having the makeover was at Frinton on Sea which made me think of you Celebsmile.

Horrible weather here today. It's all my peke can do to walk in strong winds so I'm hoping they don't last long. Little poodle pup goes mad chasing leaves, it's amazing how strong he is.

TGIF sowinecupcakeflowersto get the weekend of to a good start.

Yogagirl Sat 14-Nov-15 09:19:36

Morning ladies
Took my little dog for a walk by the sea yesterday, the wind nearly blow us off our feet, so half hour was enough! Tesco, then home to spend afternoon with ND&baby. I always feel so much better after seeing them both, feel I can cope. My ND said "no matter what you did, nasty would have cut you & then me out" and she's right! I can't bear to say his or his mothers. Next Wednesday on really channel 9pm is a programme on brainwashing!
Rhinestone Ladies of London must be only in US. Don't go and full out with your husband over this estrangement, you need each other for moral support, wish i had a husband, I do envy you all.
As you say smileless it must be terrible for those who's only child has estranged themselves. On the FB forum I'm on there are a few and its heartbreaking!
Hope your OK Celebgran i cant look back on prev page at your post, this Hudle is a nightmare to type on! Need to buy myself a laptop for Xmas I think. A few months back Sadie phoned me on a Friday to say our article was going in the next day & she wanted an update, but it still didn't appear!
Off to the Shard this afternoon, 8 'girls' out on the town, watch out London ;-)

celebgran Sat 14-Nov-15 09:32:13

Yogagirl enjoy have fantastic time in London .

I had good day with Anita she was buying card for her first Gra daughter 1st birthday I tried snow interst but it makes me feel sad, shame is t it ?
She only has one son who suddenly got married after having no girlfriends and of course am pleased for her.

What atrocious thing in Paris over 100 killed will any of us feel safe again?

MEMORY box not bad idea smileless but i feel mollie can see it all on her blog, including photos of all cards and presents over years. Still think may do that as well and perhaps put some of the jewellery I would like her to have also. Makes. mE sad sad to think I will never know her.

Enjoy weekend all we may go see bond film this afternoon!

Smileless2012 Sun 15-Nov-15 12:29:39

It's so hard trying to show an interest in other people's grand children Celeb, it brings back to me the all too few memories we have of ours and the heartbreaking fact that we'll never be able to make any more or make any at all of the baby due at Christmas.

Well there was nothing on the news this morning about 8 ladies going mad in London Yogagirl so I'm guessing you managed to behavegrin.

It's really terrible about the massacre in Paris. I couldn't believe it when I put the news on yesterday morning. This morning's Andrew Marr show ended with a French opera singer singing the French national anthem and it brought tears to my eyessad.

celebgran Sun 15-Nov-15 17:22:57

Yes I guess that is why we feel bit uninterested in other peoples grandkids i do try to be and of course y brothers Gra daughter is a joy to us.

Yes smileless it is absolutely horrendous and makes us all feel unsafe, god knows literally where it will all end. Such a cowardly thing to do, bells ringing at.notre dame start of memorial serivce so very sad.
There will have to be some retaliation for this disgraceful murder of innocents.

It is far too easy for Islamic extremists to enter countries now and this is the result.

On lighter note i believe yogagirl had great fun seeing pics o. F book!
Rustling up easy roast before going see spectre did t venture out in horrid wind rain yesterday

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 10:14:42

Paris atrocities horrendous! I watched the 24 hour news all night last night. So emotional and really made you think, with all this hatred and violence, why, oh why do our children do what they are doing!?!
My ND phoned me before I left for London on Saturday and said "Don't go mum!" but we went and had a lovely meal in Marco Pierre White's restaurant, very expensive! A couple of the girls said they wouldn't be going up the Shard, but after a couple of glasses of wine we all went. It's well worth the visit, the views are spectacular, best at night with all the lights. Again exspènsive; group photo £22, very small glass of champagne in a plastic flute £10 shock

Rhinestone Mon 16-Nov-15 12:29:47

We never know about life do we? I was in New York last year and saw the 911 memorial and visited one of the fire stations that was first to respond to the tragedy. It's so hard to wrap your head around the fact that our grandchildren will know this world of terror and grow up differently than we did. Celebgran I totally understand about the others grandchildren thing. Had dinner with my ES God parents. Their children would never not talk to them and if they are mad, they talk it out. They were empathetic to me though. Interesting that my ES God father shares office space with my X in a building. He told me that he has had to have many talks with my X about his temper, his ranting and raving and name calling in front of clients. That he needs anger management and he has had problems with everyone in the office. He is not a happy man and yet my ES identifies with him. My son will not work for anyone and has authority problems. I wonder why?
Never heard from ESS or EDIL about Aiden's being able to go with us for his birthday. But I'm taking your example Smileless and starting a memory box. I will send a card but not a gift. We will put a note in it about holding the money for him. I'm sure they won't read it to him though.
So glad you had a good time Yogagirl. It does help to get away doesn't it?
We can't live our lives in fear. We have to go on .

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 12:53:24

3 years today!! 3 years since I saw my beloved Laila & Jack. My heart cries each and every day for them :'( :'( :'( Cut out by my granddaughter's cruel stepdad & his mother. Why? Jealousy!

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 13:29:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 13:32:00

How did I managed that! Lol if you hit on the pic it enlarges

celebgran Mon 16-Nov-15 14:02:52

Yogagirl underneath threads is says add file click on that and upload tadah!

Well done. For doing it, and thinking of you today,was jack your step Grandson? They are beautiful.

celebgran Mon 16-Nov-15 14:54:41

Serves me right, got text from my good friend last night 2nd grandchild on way, just wish it was us getting good news, but realise that is mean!
Think is seeing photo of mollie has unsettled us again.

Smileless2012 Mon 16-Nov-15 16:50:21

Glad you had a good time Yogagirl and London survived your escapadesgrin. Mixed emotions today; it's DH's birthday so I've booked a taxi and we're going out for an Indian tonight (he doesn't know about it yet) smilebut alsosadbecause I know it's 3 years for you Yogagirl. I'll always know the date of your sad anniversary because it falls on DH's bday.

What a beautiful photosmile. As you say, with so much horror in the world why on earth do our children have to behave is such a terrible way.

I'm sorry you didn't hear about Aiden's bday Rhinestone they're all little sh..s, they really are. Not only is their behaviour appalling they're cowards as well. Haven't even got the courage to send a text telling you you couldn't see him. Go with sending a card for every occasion and putting one in the memory box too.

Join me in awineto toast my lovely hubbies 62nd bday and let's all have anotherwinefor Yogagirl; hope it helps you get through the saddest of days knowing that we're thinking of you.

celebgran Mon 16-Nov-15 17:26:31

Ditto from me smilless and wine for you dh who is year older and wiser than me!grin fancy being same date as for yogagirl sad one.

I SUPPOSE MY really sad one is march4 dare I got the dear mum letter that told me I was not wanted anymore. The saturday in January that I saw the horrid texts while at hers was the start.

That letter is up in loft in box with lots other painful stuff.

Hope you well as possible yogagirl there is nothing I can say except thinking of you and we do save focus our emotions on what we have as bel says.
Protect ourselves.

Enjoy that Indian smileless and many happy returns. We off folk dancing f and I have pretend delight for my friend, and I am happy please don't think otherwise it just hurts.

celebgran Mon 16-Nov-15 17:28:31

Forgot say rhinestone thanks for understanding and I am sorry that as smilless says didn't eve. Have manners to let you know about Aidan birthday,

My daughter is totally ill mannered I am So sad to say.

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 17:34:56

Celebgran done every 'click' under the sun hmm no idea what one worked, as I'd given up when I posted that one asking you how do you do it, and then when I hit 'post' it was there shock Jack is my full grandson, but different dad to Laila, both children from my EstD. I understand what you mean about your friends news, I think we are always holding our breath and hoping! Regarding your lovely picture of Molly, I have done that once, but too upsetting, can't do it again. For you flowers
Thank you smileless "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" to Mr. smileless wineflowers Can't have any myself as have a 1-2-1, should be going dancing, but don't think I can face it today :'(
Sorry you didn't get any good news Rhinestone flowers

janeainsworth Mon 16-Nov-15 17:39:11

yogagirl do you really think it's a good idea to post photos of your GC on a public forum?
Even if you were on speaking terms with your D she would have every right to be annoyed that you had done that.

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 17:40:15

Just saw your last post Celebgran Thank you for your kind words flowers

Yogagirl Mon 16-Nov-15 17:55:28

Think you may have a point Jane I've asked administration to remove it!

celebgran Mon 16-Nov-15 22:27:20

Yes better safe than sorry yogagirl though I must admit Tor friends post photos of their little ones on Facebook friends only guess that's ok.

I didn't dare put mine on here, but I have my dear twin s Gra daughter Danika as I know her mum doesn't mind.

Hope you manage sleep ok yogagirl birthdays are always worse for me.
Had fun at folk dancing and tried show interest in friends news and all babysitting she being asked to do envy

Good night all xx

Rhinestone Tue 17-Nov-15 10:22:57

**Celebgran you are right that they didn't have the manners to say no to us about seeing Aiden. I never thought of that . Oh it's so much easier to ignore and run away like babies themselves. So immature.
I don't mind people talking about their grandchildren but some are so obnoxious constantly bragging and taking out their phone to show me endless pictures. And especially if they know you are estranged from yours why put salt in a wound?
Hope you and DH had a wonderful evening **Smileless. I took your advice and am starting a memory box.
**Yogagirl my heart breaks for you for those lost years. I guess we are on our way with it being ten months.
My DH came into the bedroom last night clutching his chest. I thought he was having a heart attack. He had written one more text to his son and DIL saying adults have conversations to clear the air and could he do tat with them. He also said " please don't hold the kids hostage" and that we wanted to see them.
I don't expect any answer from the cowards.

Smileless2012 Tue 17-Nov-15 19:40:14

DH spent a day in hospital when we were visiting DS in Aus. Rhinestone with a suspected heart attackshock. I was so scared; thank God DS and lovely d.i.l. were with us. He was fine; it was due to the strain of the previous 2.5 years taking their toll. Your poor DH;flowersand a BIG (((hug))) for you both.

We had a lovely evening and DH got a great card and T shirt from DS in Aus., bless him. He was never one for remembering but since everything's happened he's never forgotten, not oncesmile.

The lovely lady who takes my class at the gym twice a week became a gran for the first time 2 weeks ago. Ismilewhen she's talking about how beautiful she is and how wonderful it is to be a gran but make a hasty exit when the photo's come out.

DH has just gone out and I'm going to settle down wand watch series 6 of Downton Abbey. Only saw the first 2 episodes before going to Florida so am looking forward to a marathon sessiongrin.

I'll pass your good wishes on to Mr. Smileless Yogagirl; 62, gets better looking as he gets older and is and always will be the love of my life.

celebgran Tue 17-Nov-15 23:37:56

Pass my good wishes on Too smileless !
Rhinestone hope hd is ok smileless is right this stress and upset can be really taxing on our health.

Is 7th xmas without our daughter and I have to try hard not to think of the lost years or I would not cope at all.

Not seen any downton yet smileless trest to come !

Did not enjoy spectre too violent and ridiculous for me.

Enjoyed evening having Toby with good friends.

God bless all x

Rhinestone Wed 18-Nov-15 12:11:30

You guys are lucky. Downton doesn't start for us until Jan. Call the Midwife is another excellent series.
Today is out Aiden's birthday. We sent a card saying "we want to take you to pick out a gift for your special day. " I don't expect they will read that to him though.
DH finally texted back his daughter and asked her if she saw the little ones when she was in town ( she didn't have time to see us) All she said back was that she wasn't equipped to handle family. So does that mean she wasn't at Aiden's party? Didn't see her 93 year old grandmother? Her mom? What an answer!
So that's it . We are done. I thought maybe the ESS and EDIL changed their phone numbers . I guess that would be a fantasy.
Going to just concentrate on my DD kids.

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