So now I know

GA How lucky you are to have your sister reassure you that you where not the cause of the breakdown of your relationship but as you say "collateral damage" which is very sad in its self,and the fact your sister is willing to be a go between keeps the door wide open for things to be mended even if it takes some time.I have not spoken to my sister for nearly 16yrs now and it is breaking my heart as we where so close but I have no one to act as go between as she has my other sisters sided with her,so I do hope your DD grabs the chance to mend bridges in the near future.
I'm sending all my thoughts and prayers to you on behalf of you mum and DGD I hope you have a good outcome for both of them I just can't imagine how stressful things are at present for you. Take care brave lady.

I hope this is the beginning of some good bridge building granny-a.

Best wishes to the poorly ones. x

I have no wise words to offer ga just to say that putting myself in your position it must be such a relief to finally know. My good wishes for you, mum and dearest little one

GA firstly my thoughts are very much with you and I fervently hope all starts looking up from here, especially for your poorly mum and GD.

Secondly how sad that you've suffered for 10 years without your sister saying anything, I do hope her intervention will mean bridges are built very soon.

Best wishes and ((hugs)) to you x

Your daughter didnt say anything either. Not sure what to write.
I hope that that situation improves in the future.
Is it the same daughter that has just had your gd?
You must be very anxious

No wonder you have hives.

Stay strong - this could be the beginning of a thawing of relationships and a step forward - I do so hope that it is. And I do hope that the new GD will be gaining strength now; and that things work out for the best with your mum.

What a stressful time for you.

I don't think it is the same daughter soon!

Just sending you lots of love GA and hoping everything starts to look better soon. Have you been able to see your DH yet? You need a hug, I think!

GA my heart goes out to you and I am fervently wishing that you will soon have some peace of mind.

GA sending you all best wishes for a happier and closer future, whatever has gone before

By the way, I have always assumed that the split with your DD was not down to you ga - from your posts here it is clear that you are a kind and tolerant person and would not have done anything to make her cut herself off. I know that you will have the goodness of heart to let bygones be bygones if at long last some sort of rapprochement takes place. I really do have my fingers and toes crossed for you in all your current trials.

grannya you are having a tough time at the moment so I hope something good will come from this development.
Good wishes for your dgd and your mum, and I hope your daughter is recovering too.
Bless you

soon it's a different daughter.
My sister's reason for not saying anything sooner is because she didn't want my mum to know the cause of my daughter cutting herself off. She was going to wait until mum had died to tell me, but yesterday was overcome with guilt and decided to get it off her chest.
I can't explain the mixture of emotions I'm experiencing today. I'm sitting in a darkened side room at my mother's bedside, looking at photo's of my granddaughter (barely visible in the midst of wires and tubes) on my ipad and occasionally getting supportive messages from my younger three children, husband and friends; thinking of life and death and the nature of relationships. I seem to have found real peace in the eye of the storm.

That's really good to have found those moments amongst an absolute maelstrom of emotions GA
I fail to understand your sister not saying anything up to now, knowing what she does, but hopefully things will turn around x

ga isn't it strange how crises can bring about such changes when they aren't expected? I recognise that feeling about being so close to life and death and the calm that can be found in the midst of such turmoil. I hope your little grandaughter will soon be growing and showing her family that she is resilient and ready to put her mark on the world.

You are going through one of those awful times that life throws at some of us. I know its not the first time you've had to draw on all your strength.

My thoughts are with you (((hugs)))

I am glad that you are finding some peace.

Rest is good - recharge for the challenges ahead.

I presume your sister was asked not to say anything? How awful, for all of you, and you must be feeling torn every which way. I hope there are calmer times head.

hope things turn around for you all ...

My heart goes out to you...
A little star of hope is shining, and may it shine for your mother, dear special little granddaughter so far away, and your estranged dear daughter.

for you ga

So many things to cope with all at once, but hopefully light at the end of the tunnel. Thinking of you.

GA can imagine how your mind must be in turmoil. You are very much in my thoughts and prayers, with profound hope that all will be well with your new grandchild and her Mum

I hope everything is going to work out well for you now ga
and all best wishes for your DM and the baby