Christmas

Oh yes, sorry - between the words!

nag get with the flow

What flow? What have I missed now?

We did neither set of parents. spent Christmas on our own. bliss. Visited after christmas. the emotional stuff from the out laws was a bit annoying though. ex was just as bad.

I now do christmas for my mum who was widdowed recently. first christmas she was in a nursing home, second she was home but ended up in hospital over christmas and we could hardly visit as ds had a tummy bug. then last year she spent new years eve in hospital.

i have a strange arrangement at Christmas. My son has one grandparent left and it's my ex.'s mum. My son and I with my husband visit and have a meal with my ex and his mum. My son,my ex and his mum were all only children.

Thanks for GA

I do admire those of you that are content to Christmas alive and enjoy it. I am not in constant touch with my busy family, they are too busy coping with jobs, partners and teenagers. Must admit I do feel as if I don't matter anymore, now that DH has died. Other people seem to cope that much better, but perhaps they in turn think I do as I don't dwell on it with my friends.

Up until last Xmas we would have DS, DIL and DGS every second year. In the interim, they would go to her family and we would go to the Cotswolds to be spoilt for a few days. Our DD lives overseas and we have had her with us as well when it was our turn to entertain. We will be going away this year but it's all change next year as DS and DIL have split up and we are not sure what will happen now. However, last year was so exhausting with everything to do and no help offered from the family that we decided that in future we would go out for Xmas lunch. It will be interesting to see what happens. One thing about families - they are never boring!

Would it be worth speaking up Luckylegs9?

Not really, I have tried in the past and was told they their own very busy lives. It would result in bad feelings all round! Cannot imagine talking to my parents that way.

It's roastchicken allinoneword Ana

Oh bum, didn't read to the end sorry....

Christmas does seem to be a minefield for some. I just go with the flow, not particularly expecting anything so can be DH +me, DH, me and DD, plus DS, DDIL and DGS as well.

I have said that if we're home alone then we'll have a Christmas Day picnic on a beach somewhere . We did it once before and it was lovely; homemade tomato soup, cold meats and hot jacket potatoes, lots of pickles and nibbles and Tiramisu for pud.

Loopylou - what a wonderful idea your Christmas picnic is. I really fancy that by myself or with others if they wanted to come along. I just love the sea and to sit with the waves lapping and the wind on my cheeks would be amazing. I might put that forward as an idea for this year. This is Scotland so maybe the family will think I am losing it.

Last year I had Christmas with DD2 DGS2 and ExH at DD2 house. Her partner was there but ate Pizza on the floor rather than join the table and eat his pizza. (I have dietery requirements and thought I would cause too much bother but apart from someone sitting on the floor with pizza it was fine. ExH invited DD2 to his house for New Year. When she arrived with DG2 ExH had her phone me and get me to come over. I had ExH over to my house for DD2's birthday meal. It can be done amicably provided all parties are of similar mind.
SPF

My M-i-L always sulked at Christmas when things didn't go entirely her way - still does! When our kids were small, we always had Christmas at home visiting the outlaws on christmas eve and my parents on christmas morning. They were all welcome to join us for lunch if they wished.

I remember the angst from M-i-L though and have never done the same thing with my kids/grand-children. If they want to come, great, if they want to stay home, great, we usually find a day for us all to celebrate together whether it's THE day or not - it's just a day after all and I hate them to feel under pressure. On the quiet I think DH and I would love to spend Christmas together - just the two of us ...