What are the joys of grandparenting

Cuddles, heart to heart chats on topics you've never thought of, a new set of eyes for everything, games, planning treats, nativity plays, worry, nappies when younger, children's parties, Christmas takes on a new dimension etc etc etc. Its human nature to be especially aware when things go wrong. Things go well for the majority of GPs but they maybe hesitate to post about the joys in case it seems to be rubbing it in for the poor GPs who aren't so lucky.

I was invited to the hospital soon after my GD was born and I instantly fell in love with her. My SIL was on paternity leave so we 'backed off'. We were soon needed when he went back to work and also we babysat so they could go out occasionally. The first time we had my GD overnight, we were given two foolscap pages of instructions. I have a photo of me showing the baby the instructions and telling her that she was not following her bit!

We looked after my GD while my daughter went into hospital to have her second. Our instructions after the baby was born were to take my GD to the hospital to meet her brother and go away to give them family time! We went to their house to fill in time and found the kitchen in a bit of a state so washed up etc. and then we were allowed to go to the hospital.

Perhaps I am trying to say be willing to back off and if you feel like offering advice....don't. Think about it for a while and find a tactful way of doing it.

I truly had no particular expectations of being a grandparent, I really didn't - just another step along the road of life I thought. But I am lucky enough to have been pleasantly surprised. I know I am lucky in that I have a good relationship with all DDs and my mother was a brilliant grandparent to them so I have a good role model. The best bits are when, totally unprovoked, DGC rush across a room to hug you and say they love you (even tho they haven't the faintest clue what it means) - when their faces light up when they see you, and some of the things they come out with are nothing short of hilarious. I hated it when new grandparents could talk about nothing else but the babies - now I am as bad as them! I am more tolerant of small children on airplanes (but not hideous ones in cafes etc) - I can deal with tantrums better as a grandparent as I am one step removed. I have 6 under the age of 4 (2 are steps so nothing like as much contact). The other best bits are when I can hand them back and have a peaceful house again! PS The other great thing has been introducing them to new experiences ie helping grow my vegetables, weeding, pulling and eating baby carrots straight from the ground - sniffing flowers to discover different fragrances - brilliant.

The way you will smile when you hear that thump on the front door announcing they are here.

The long winded and rambling explanations of something that happened at school while they struggle to put into words this exciting event because their brains work faster than their tongues.

Smile and cuddles and 'I love you Nana'

Pictures drawn just for you.

Their first steps.

Being told 'I can do it myself' and watching them put on their shoes or zip up their coats, and seeing thrm strive for independence.

The wonder in their eyes at things we take for granted.

And yes Granarchist handing them back at the end of the day!

Yup Anya - all of the above -

Im very lucky and have been involved in their lives from Day I.

I have a very special relationship with each of my grandchildren that grows and changes as they do.

With my 9 year old granddaughter , I'm her shopping companion of choice ( i wonder why :-) ) we do lunch sometimes or girlie movies , and have sat together at my dressing table since she was old enough to climb up for makeup sessions ( and now puts it on herself better than I ever could !!)

With my 6yr old grandson its all about the lego and the outdoors , and he and Grampy spend many happy hours discussing boy things that Nana has no clue about!!

With the 4 yr old I am his Nana. Simply as that. I am his partner in crime, his co chef, his painter and sticker. Just his !

With my 20 month old grandson Im the bringer of sweeties and hugs and kisses and the owner of his favourite thing in the whole world Dog Dog !

To them all I am the provider of treats and cuddles , sleepovers, quiet chats, stories and able to make everything right in their world no matter what !

And my lovely DD and SiLs let me do just that - I'm a lucky lucky woman !!

One of my greatest joys has been to see my husband step into his role as a wonderful, hands-on grandfather. The grandchildren adore him and he relishes his contacts with them.
Because our daughter was widowed very soon after becoming a mother for the first time, and her baby was premature, we were more involved than most grandparents. It is a continuing joy to observe the developing personalities of our grandchildren. Our youngest was born at only 27 weeks and we are thrilled when she achieves every little milestone.

My current joy is realising just how special the relationship still is as they "grow up". When mine were small I would say that I wanted to freeze them as young children, but oldest is now 17 any I couldn't have a better friend. She texts me everyday, comes for lunch on her shortest day at college and yesterday asked me if I would go to a hospital appt with her next week as Mum can't go. She has had 5 ops and I stayed all day when she was a baby while Mum went home to sleep and for the last 2 when she had younger siblings I stayed overnight.

Jane10 You're so right, I'm new to GN too like Imperfect and have hesitated to post much upbeat information about grand-parenting because many posters on here do seem unlucky in that area. It's refreshing to see such a loving gooey topic here!

There is so much to look forward to, and everything your grandchild does is like a new discovery. It is enriching for both of you. You start to see the world differently in that you question their innocent questions, rather than give the usual stock answers, because you want to help nurture their thirst for knowledge. It also takes you back to the time when your own children were babies and toddlers, and those wonderful memories come flooding back. Out come the old photo albums to reminisce.

Most of it has already been said, but the cuddles and the running towards you with outstretched arms are priceless. The stories, the walks with the dog, the mess over the floor, playing in the park ...... so much to enjoy!

I have lots of grownup grands and now they come around and do 'jobs' that OH and I can't manage anymore the two of the grandsons came in the Summer and painted the outside of house which we were very happy with.

This Summer they all want to come together to share a caravan holiday just as we did when they were little, so they are booking two large caravans and we are all going in convoy with all their girlfriends/boyfriends in tow to the place where we spent many many happy Summer holidays in years gone by. I'm sure you'll have all this to come in the future for many years.

I consider myself to be very lucky my own mother only lived a short time after my DC were born. So wasn't able have the joy of ..
Kisses and cuddles ahh
Tiny hand that first grips your finger
Then a small one holding yours when out for a walk to feed the ducks
Laughing when DGS wants to eat the bread instead giving it to the ducks
Being amazed when first Smile,sat first word or when they crawl and walk (even though you have seen it all before with DC)
When the climb up on to your lap, snuggle down for a nap
The lovely smile they give you when they awake
Running around the garden laughing and squealing (and that's just you!)
Settling down to look at a book under the cherry tree
Hoping that you live to see them as they grow and flourish
I could go on and on...

Oh and when they have a cold and you think they are snuggling in but they are really just wiping a Snotty. Nose on your shoulder!

I knew that I would love being a Grandma, but it was even better than anticipated. GS is now 13 and we have shared his journey through life. A lot of this thanks to his parents including us in their lives. We do a lot for all of them and they know what side their bread is buttered! A surprise was how much ideas and equipment had changed. Particularly equipment. Buggies high chairs car seats. How they worked! One day we just couldn't work out how to collapse the buggy so DH drove George home and I pushed the empty buggy. And once you know it is eastY of course. It did mean that we were not the experts. The parents were. And that was good.

I was the very first person to get a smile from my second grandson. His mum called his dad in, and everyone gathered round to watch. I'll never forget that.

oh boy - the new kit (I remember my DM exclaiming over new children's clothing when mine were born) - I had to put the pushchair unfolded in the back of my car as I simply could not fold it - luckily I have an estate car - and the high chair my DD has been lent - it does everything except play god save the queen (it is hideous plastic tho) . Mind you DD did not realise for 6 months that the front wheels of her pushchair could be made to work independently until her sister showed her! So its not just us. The biggest change must be nappies - oh lord those plastic buckets of Napisan. But children do seem to stay in nappies far longer than ours did. Horrible wet terry nappies were a great incentive to potty train. And while those new pushchairs cost a fortune at least they go 'cross-country' which my Cindico never did, with its tiny wheels. As we spend our lives in fields with animals the new type are a godsend.

Thank you for sharing these lovely, lovely posts. It is clear too that a great deal of enjoyment is to be had from continuing family traditions - something I am just about to do by sending my first parcel to my GS ... it has a bar of chocolate for mummy when she is up on a night feed and 'I love you' mummy and daddy' bibs. That has also cheered me up immensely!

Our DGD is the joy in our life! She was born very small at 32 weeks and I think at his first sighting my husband fell in love after being quite indifferent throughout the pregnancy ... although he is the only grandad, he is actually a step. She is like his wee shadow now!
Luckily we live nearby so get plenty babysitting opportunities and visits. We also go to visit my old mum every other week as well as having her to stay and it's lovely to see the wee one getting to know her great Gran.
It can be very tiring if there's a lot of babysitting in a week, but I wouldn't miss it for the world!

My most treasured memory is of GS2 running to me in a shallow kids pool and throwing his arms around me, hugging me tightly and planting a big sloppiy kiss ?

The joys.......
When they run up the front path arms outstretched grinning and shouting 'nannie' !!
Teaching them about nature and other things that busy parents don't have time for.
Being hugged and told 'nannie, I luf you'

My 3 year Grandaughter jumping up and down with excitement when I got to her house saying "Granny I have been waiting for you". Nothing matches the love you have for grandchildren. The joy is purer because you don't have the responsibility of parenting. I can only see her about once a month and wish it could be more.

All the above. My 13 year old DGS is still happy to spend time with us. He chats away and teaches me a lot about cars, Warhammer, new things I can do on my 'phone and lap top among other things. He brings me so much joy . Am now eagerly awaiting DD3 producing a new DGC next month .

The first thing that "surprised me with joy" when my first GC was born, was the intensity of the love I felt when I first met them. And when my second GC was born, it was the fact this was happening a second time, all over again.

After that, the hugs, the kisses, the sweet, genuine smiles - all these serve to bring me much joy. And the sweet, loving, often unexpected comments, like, "Ill love you forever, Nana!"

Mostly, I think what you have to look forward to is just the sheer joy of being around your grands. They represent our mortality, after all. As long as you steer clear of such pitfalls as insisting that you "know better" about any given chidlrearing practice, etc. you'll be fine, IMO. IOWs, don't be a back seat driver on the jpurney of DD's and SIL's lives and you will often be a welcome passenger.

You've already learned that it was a mistake to make assumptions. I'm so sorry you're disappointed. But, no worries, this period will soon pass and I'm sure you'll get more time with your new GC if you don't gripe about things now. I hope this has taught you what we all learn, I guess, nowadays - don't have too many expectations - or try not to, anyway. Cuz the parents might not see things the way you do. Just go with the flow and enjoy!

Congratulations!

Wrote the above without reading any of the previous posts, so that I wouldn't be influenced by them. But now I want to say that I think they are all beautiful! What a refreshing thread this is!

I'm another one who is cautious about speaking of the generally good relations I have with my DDs and their kids, due to the fact that there are so many posts here about unhappy relationships. But now I want to add that, yes, one of the greatest joys is just seeing Christmas and other events through childish eyes again. Or things of nature like a dandelion or a colorful sunset. When I'm with my DGC, it's like the whole world is "young" again!

Yes, yes, yes! It's great to share family traditions with them, too! Love the parcel you're sending and I'm sure DD and SIL will, too (too bad baby is too little to appreciate it yet, LOL!). Just please be careful not to get too set on sharing every favorite tradition with GS. Cuz yunno, the parents may want to work in some of SIL's family's traditions, too, or start some of their own. I'm sure you'll get to pass down many of yours, but maybe not all.

But I'm glad to see this thread made you feel better again. Enjoy!

Woke up smiling this morning ... my phone bleeped before lunch yesterday and the longed-for invitation to visit was there ... so I took the parcel contents with me and drove up with the hugest grin on my face all the way. It was a wonderful visit and I actually feel like a granny now!
Loads of cuddles, asked for advice and able to get dinner for my DD and SIL and 'creep away' after washing up.

Perhaps one of the most lovely things was my SIL handing me a book of visitor's parking permits and telling me to keep it because I am going to need it! I was made to feel so welcome.

And my first joys ... 5 day old DGS looking at me with bleary eyes and contentedly sleeping on my lap. Realising that both DD and I stroked his tummy absent-mindedly in the same way. Seeing the little family being a little family.

Wendysue, you make a great point about enjoying traditions without swamping the couple with your version of them. I think we will be fine, but it is a good note of caution.

I'm glad people have enjoyed the chance to get all gooey - we should celebrate what is truly wonderful. When I first read around this site I did feel this was a missing element even though I understand the need for sensitivity.