As some of you know, my mum is dying and has been on end of life care for 7 weeks or so. Initially, my two brothers and I were each going every day but the strain was telling so we now take a day each.
My problem is that I hate visiting! I find it really difficult to cope with the flaking skin, the oral thrush, the hallucinations, the skin and bones look and trying to get mum to take fluids.
I feel awful because, although I feel sorry for mum, I feel sorry for me too and every day I don't want to go back again. 
WendyS So did my OH (she's his Aunt) when he lived up there, but he is obviously looking for ? status 
I've just caught up with this thread while sitting in mum's room wondering whether she will wake up and, if she does, will she still think I'm my brother?
Mum seems to have plateaued.
Oh how awful for you kitty
I know exactly how it feels to sit and watch and wait.
It has been just over 4 weeks since I lost my mum and I can't get the picture of her lying there, out of my head. In the last days it just wasn't "her" any more and that is the picture I see when I am lying awake at night, not the picture of her smiling or laughing.
When my grandma died back in September it was different. She had lived a long life and she had simply reached the end. She died looking peaceful and like "herself" and was "with it" right until the last. When I close my eyes and think of her I see my lovely, smiling, funny, awkward as hell grandma. 
gilly, I'm sure eventually those memories will fade and the best bits of your Mum are what you will remember. 
Morghew, it's just a case of waiting for Mum to go now. And, my brothers and I have had a mixed relationship with mum so it's a bit weird. The care staff are lovely and we look after each other too.
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