Estrangement / Cut off Mum

Is Araabra a dil who knows she is in the wrong?

I wouldnt have thought there is any mother or mother in law anywhere, who thinks they have never done anything wrong.

I see you did respond, in part Araabra on the thread in AIBU.

I think it's pretty obvious what I meant Ankers has she wrongly cut out her parents or in laws without justification.

LOL! I'm not WendySue! Iv seen some of her posts and agree with some of what she says. But she's much gentler than I am.

However, I don't see where Iv said anything harsh here. I think some people are personalizing statements that aren't about them.

Smiles yes, I responded to your questioning, in the post containing your questions.

My post about mothers and mils was to Araabra as well. Sorry I didnt make that clear.

grr. That isnt much clearer either.

I dont need the as well in the last post.

Ankers

Well Araabra, you said what your frame of reference is which goes some way to explaining your tunnel vision on the subject but you didn't address what I said about our ES's wife cutting her own parents out of her life before doing so to us.

You said I only have a perceived notion of her upbringing which I've said isn't so as her parents were friends of ours before our son met her. You've ignored a pertinent point; it must be more than a coincidence that this woman cuts out her parents AND her parents in law. Perhaps this simply doesn't fit in with your narrow view.

Smiles maybe you lived in ES's wife's brain all the time? But if not you really know nothing, do you? Is it she who turned DS or did her turn her? If he is not happy why does he stay? Back to magic of some sort?

Likewise smileless our daughter cutting out or rather s I law doing so her entire family including devoted godparents, brother, aunts, cousins etc etc. Everyone that loved her.

I guess that was magic? More like a tragedy,

Quick question, whyever do these so unhappy DS and DD stay with their horrible partners?

If you really are interested in a reply to your question Araabra - there are 2 main reasons. The first is that they know that if they leave, the partner will make it as difficult as possible for them to see their children (I expect you will say this should not bother them as they aren`t "entitled" to see their children). The second reason is that they cannot afford to support their children and pay for alternative accommodation for themselves.

Go on - pick fault in that

I've never know anyone to make visits difficult, but if you say it's so, then I'd agree, seeing the kids is paramount. The solicitor's role is?

Second bit, I've also never heard that, both have incomes and would be able to self support, but, again, ok. Better job or income management?

Serious Araabra you're contributing nothing helpful to this thread and are clearly causing stress to posters who don't need it. You constantly chuck in unpleasant comments or ask people to justify themselves.
Why not do the decent thing and just bow out?
Your ongoing barbs are downright cruel!

Mcem Seriously? There is a hidden barb in asking about income management and the solicitor?

Better to always blame the c i l?

I'm really not sure if you are 'human' Araabra - your posts woiuld suggest otherwise.

You have 'never heard' of anyone making visits difficult? It's not uncommon in the real world which the rest of us inhabit. Solicitors job? Well they're good at taking money. Not everyone can afford to employ one.

Better job or income management?? Oh come on, get real. It's not always possible to get a 'better job.' A family splitting up can present enormous financial difficulties.

I really don't know why I'm bothering to dignify your posts with a response. You really are a 'nasty piece of work' but, I suspect, you secretly get some perverse pleasure out of it , and I also suspect you don't have grandchildren despite your claim to the contrary.

No dearie, I know civilised people who want both parents involved in the childrens lives. I'm sure I only know a few divorced younger parents. And, yes, income can always be better managed. If problems come up, I for one, believe outside help is very important for fixes, not team mom and dad.

A solicitor, better money management, and not throwing off on c i l are not "barbs" in a real world.

You're very good at 'text book' responses, but your answers suggest that you, personally, have little personal experience of estrangement and the hardships that ensue.

You appear to 'know it all' but the consensus on this thread, even from posters who are not estranged, is that you don't. As no-one, apart from 'magic virginia * Bibbity*', appears to find your comments helpful, perhaps you would consider moving over to Mumsnet and giving them the benefit of your inexperience?

Good night all. It's 11.30pm here,and we have an early start tomorrow.

Best to ignore him/her on this thread.

Him/her does actually make better comments, sometimes, on others.

Hidden barb? No not hidden, open and blatant unpleasantness!
I have no first-hand experience of the misery of estrangement but have come across crassness and cruelty. I honestly can't see what you're getting out of this and it would seem that those most affected have asked you to back off.
So why don't you?
It seems you have nothing helpful to offer and frankly it seems to be none of your business. Go and amuse yourself by pulling the wings off butterflies or some equally nasty pasttime.

A and b are sad people, but just like a fire needs air to rage , these individuals need responses to continue. I must admit when I see their names I never read their posts but the responses to them make me cross but they upset those that this forum means something to. So please don't give a and b a second thought, just by pass what they put on, they will soon get bored and move on. Bullies are cowards, don't make them feel good.

? I can assure you I live a very fulfilling and active life surrounded by the uncondotional love of my friends and family.
But if that is another lie you wish you convinc yourself of to make you feel better please know it has no effect on me what so ever.
Many many other forums discuss this board. That's how I stumbled across it.
Trust me a lot worse has been said.
Trust me a lot of CO children have noticed creepy similarities in posts to what their CO parents have said and can explain exactly why they chose to remove their children.
This is a forum on a public internet site.
Anyone in the world can post.
The amount of times I see posts saying ooo ignore them their mean is just laughable.
It just shows there is no real intelligent debate or discussion to have.

Mcem lol, thanks for your support

Bibbity u have lot time to spare for someone withnall this unconditional love??
Why don't u stop being vile and go and enjoy it ha ha. If U don't have estrangement u must be rather an unhappy person no one happy or content would post is such aggressive vile way from psychological point of view.

Luckylegs u are so wise and exactly what I advised earlier.

Got get off here frieds coming for dinner and we had v late night at dance ? wish could have danced more but was great fun be with friends,
This is first entertaining we have done since my illness and ed godparents so bittersweet,

Happy Sunday all