Older people seen as a burden.

Absent your post was very poignant. I've found this thread very interesting. Different people with different experiences. I know ungrateful people both young and old. It's not age it's personality. However I do think that the media is being encouraged to pit the young against the old. I saw an item on the news this morning were they had an older man and young girl comparing their lifestyles. I thought to myself that it really could be misinterpreted by the young as some of the older generation 'never having it so good' and that indeed may be true. The emphasis should be on some just as some of the younger generation have much better opportunities than my generation could ever envisioned.

I've always taken the view that my children and other younger people don't owe me anything.

I chose to have my children, they didn't ask to be born.

I and my generation have robbed the 30 somethings(i.e. my children) blind, polluted their world, priced them out of housing and really f***ed them over.

Can't blame them if they moan.

morethan2 I'm astounded when I hear people say we had it much easierthan young folk today .I worked since I was 13 ,got married at 21 ,started a business at 22 worked until I left to go to the labour ward and was back at my desk 8 DAYS later.We didn't have a carpet for over two years ,lived on toasted cheese while we built the business and lived in rented housing until we'd been married 9 years ,no holidays no NEW cars nights out were rare and even then just the local pub .I look at young marrieds now and they have everything that we didn't,even childcare !I took my babies to work WITH me .mum wouldn't have watched our kids ,she always said she'd had her turn ,so if we had them we looked after them .Now I'm on tap for childcare for 4 grandchildren ,in fact my late mother used to tell me I shouldn't be looking after the two eldest I should have spent more time with her!!If any young person thinks they would like to sample how life was for us and millions like us in the 70's they are very welcome to try...it wasn't all moonlight and roses and I haven't even started on the 16% interest rate on our first mortgage .Its time all this pitting generations against one another stopped.Every generation thinks they're having it harder than the one before ,but look closer and that isn't the case

Started work when you were 13? Blimey - I don't think we were allowed to leave school before 15 (I realise you were not at school in England).

I don't think young people have it easier but they do have a different sort of difficult.

As for hearing them complaining about the old, I imagine they will be the old people complaining about the young when they are our age. Just as I imagine the old people who now complain about the young were not the most thoughtful when they were young.

I think there's good and bad in every walk of life. I know of one daughter with 5 children 11 to 30, who has put her life on hold to help her terminally ill, not always present, when she was young, father, she takes him to hospital, has him stay over when the treatments get bad, my friend says she is wonderful and happy to be there for him because she loves him to bits. The you get the frightfully busy ones, not enough hours in the day, then some that really don't care, it's all about them. All types of people. I airways promised myself I would not be a misnomer old person, or expect anything, very good job I did, but I didn't exoectations this. I think the moral us, expect nothing then you won't be disappointed.

Roy&syl }}}HUGS{{
I have no one to help me either, try to do everything myself, as can't afford to keep calling in workmen. Have a Son, but not seen him for 4.5yrs My s.i.l is busy with his own family [my niceD] and his mother is on her own, he helps his sister too, even though she has a partner, so no time left for me, I wouldn't ask anyway. Nice words & advise from Luckylegs for you.

Paddy no doubt went to school as well as worked. I got a job in a hairdressers at 13yrs, then in the market place on a ladies dress stall, full time work at 15yrs.

I do wish people wouldn't go on about high interest rates in our day - 16% on a mortgage of say £20,000 is nothing compared to 2.5% on £200,000 (which will buy you 40% in a shared-ownership, one-bedroom flat in London).

By any measure young families have it harder today compared to when I got married in 1977. Back then everyone I knew bought their own home, no matter how modest their income. I bet most GN's are home-owners.

Today, young couples have it very hard and most are destined to a life of renting with all the insecurities that brings.

But Riverwalk at the time we were paying 15% on a mortgage of £30, 000 salaries were not what they are now - more like about £8, 000, so proportionate. Our mortgage payment was half our monthly income.
That was in London and thankfully none of our DC have had to buy in London.

Jalima today's average salary no way compensates for the decrease in mortgage rates, compared to house prices, no matter where you live.

I don't know the figures but I imagine there are far fewer young couples buying properties (full value rather than shared-ownership) than in the 70/80s.

Talking of shared-ownership ... this didn't exist in the 70s, as it wasn't necessary. We all had the luxury of buying a property outright, rather than a 25% share and pay rent on the remaining 75%.

Well bionicwoman I don't believe for one moment that I've "f***ed over" our 30 something children. We gave them a loving and secure home, financially assisted our eldest through uni., supported financially and emotionally our youngest through his career choice and stumped up, with my brother's help, the deposit on his house.

If anything, he's f***ed us over, took all that was given and then cut us out of his and our GC's lives. Yes, some young couples don't have it easy but neither did we when we were newly married and raising our family.

Heard this on TV today from an actress playing a mum and explaining to another character what parenthood is like 'have you heard about the magic money tree, over the years your children strip it bare and when there's nothing left, they sit down on the stump; that's what being a parent means'. Yes I know rather a cynical pint of view but there are an awful lot of AC relying on the bank of mum and dad.

"Started work when you were 13?"
They weren't so fussy about when you left school in those days. If your parents needed you to help out with the family finances you just did it. And you weren't chased up.
Linked to legislation for compulsory education.

We worked out the other day that my mum (she's 95) left school when she was 13. She had told everyone 14 for years but as her birthday is in August she finished in the July when she was still only 13. Compulsory education until 15 only came in in 1944.

My daughter says she's buying me a one way ticket to Switzerland the first time I wet myself! Hopefully she's joking ?

Well, it would be nice if they paid for tickets to Switzerland for us both; I was thinking that we'd have to fund ourselves.

Of course, they'd get the money back wouldn't they (wouldn't have to use it for care!).

DM passed the scholarship but was unable to go to the grammar school due to financial reasons so spent her last year of school aged 13-14 taking the infants' class.

They were just having a moan. Times are so hard for AC, they all do moan I think.

You moan about your parents when you are a teenager. You don't moan once you become an adult – because you are an adult and whatever is wrong in your life is NOT DOWN TO YOUR PARENTS!

Luckylegs perhaps they were just like me and enjoyed a good moan. I moaned about my parents when I was a teenager, I moaned about them when I was an adult. I miss them now their dead Now I'm older I realise the many obstacles they faced I now realise why they acted as they did. Now I moan about my children, but never ever about my perfect grandchildren...yet! I think some people are just moaners. That's what I meant in my first post. Some people just moan. On a serious note I do think the media are not helping by pitting one generation against the other.

Take it with a pinch of salt.....they need our experience to keep them in the lifestyle they are accustomed to....I think it depends a lot on our attitude to young people. I meet lots of young people, 20-30 somethings and I work with a 17 year old...I treat them as equals and have never had a problem. As a matter of fact the seventeen year old and I regularly disco dance in the charity shop where we work, along to the radio, to the amusement of the customers!! We discuss everything. Recently I was away for 3 weeks and when I returned she hugged me and said how much she missed me..as some of the other staff behave like old fogies toward her.

Firstly, we didn't do anything to rob the younger generation, what we actually did was try to give our children the best start in life that we could. I'm our case, we put out children through school to age 18, we supported them through university, including paying the free for out youngest child. We helped to get started in life financially and practicality, and we continue to help wherever they need us now. I have every confidence that there are many other gransnetters who did likewise, and I guess we all supported our children as much as we were able.
We didn't start on a feather bed in the 70s, every darn thing in our tiny house was second hand. We received sheets, plates, pans etc as wedding presents and we were grateful for them. We were not given money for an exotic honeymoon, we didn't have a honeymoon! All the young people I know had got house beautifully furnished before they got married and they asked for money as wedding presents so they could enjoy a lovely honeymoon, and we gave it gladly. I'm pleased they are starting better than we did.I
We DID pay huge interest rates on our mortgages, and interest rates are now low, whilst salaries are much higher. They all the latest mobile phones, tablets, massive tvs, regular holidays abroad, and cars. We had none of these when we got married. We didn't even have a landline, we couldn't afford it!
The media is causing this rift, they should stop it. And by the way, I paid for my own pension, and haven't yet received a state pension, it's been delayed, quite fairly, by the government. We pensioners are doing our bit!

maddyone, We did not rob the younger generation, times are just harder to them.

Whie I agree especially that house prices are ludicrously high now in relation to income (around 11x average income where I live) I do think young people expect everything ASAP these days. They seem to feel that they are entitled to have everything straight away rather than saving, as maddy says we managed without stuff or went to the charity chop. It still amazes me the amount some young people must pay for their mobiles (unless, like my DD, bank of mum pays for it!)

I have come to the conclusion that the younger generation can sometimes get very stressed, working and all the activities their kids have to do nowadays. It is safer to vent their frustration at their parents who they know will love them no matter what.