Support for Grans cut-out of AC&GC lives

for your D Maddy I hope she's feeling better.

Our friends left in the early hours this morning. It's unbelievably quiet here now and the villa looks as it its been hit by a bomb.

It's been a wonderful 10 days. They bought me a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses to say 'thank you' but it's us who needed to thank them.

They gave us something we never thought we'd experience. The joy of seeing the 6 and 4 year old boys in our pool, their happy and excited faces at the parks and me, bathing our God son who'll be 1 next month and playing with him in the pool.

It will be 5 years for us next month and the last 10 days have really brought home to us what our S has taken away and what can never, ever be replaced. This is the first time we've spent any length of time with little ones and the extent of what they've done has really hit home.

I thought I'd handled their leaving really well as we kissed them all goodbye last night but when I saw that empty cot and high chair this morning, I just cried.

The children really enjoyed their time with us, as we did with them and I know our GC would have enjoyed spending time with us too, only they've never had the chance.

Smilless ?Of course our grandkids would have loved being with us, maddyone is correct it is abuse to be treated as we have.

We have had privilege of enjoying my twins grandkids and I thank god for that. At first it hurt me thinking wish it was my own Grandaughter but we love her so and little brother that I no longer think that way I know we lucky,
Glad you have had that precious time to spend with friends little ones and your godson

Our daughter s cruelty knows no bounds she will realised better than anyone how devastated I am losing Rosie but not even a card,

Her loss as one of my friends said,

Some good news ladies I had to go for gynae scan and see specialist this morning and everything is fine!

Off for rest now was early,start and I have that neck pain earache thing.

Happy Monday all
Yogagirl hope you ok time just marches on.

We are determined to enjoy every day and waste no time on a cruel daughter who doesn't give a damn about us,
Just thank god for our son.

Celebgran Maddy & Sparklygran Thank you for your kind words.

For poor little Rosie

Oh Smileless I'm so sorry! As I've already said, 5yr ann. looming for me too, first my Son's 31st Birthday [Sunday], next day the passing of my Dad, which was out of the blue, so a terrible shock All these sad things in a matter of weeks

I too keep thinking [as always] of all that joy, love & happiness, turned into a living nightmare, and for what reason; jealousy! For all of us on here I'm sure it's the same reason, apart from LL from what she says. My estD's Birthday comes a week after the execution [cut out]. She will never get a Birthday or Xmas card with 'Special dear Daughter' on again [her dad never bothered], how, how can that bring her happiness??

Thanks yogagirl Rosie was famous little doggie!

Feel for you so many sad anniversaries that as you say should have been happy!
I like you can't understand how my daughter can be happy cutting her mum dad brother and entire family and devoted godparents out !

I just,can't ruin rest of my life over it yogagirl and neither must you life is far too short losing little Rosie has confirmed that please try to focus on who does love and want you and enjoy each day

Do hope lucklylegs is well enough to enjoy her break this week silly lady picking half term week

That used to really upset me seeing nana will their grandkids I cope better now.

Smilless are you coming home soon?
We got funnweekend with friends on 3rd Nov
And go see our son on 10th yipeee!

Good morning Ladies
I haven`t been on Gransnet for weeks but just popped in to see how you all are doing - pleased to hear Smileless is having a good holiday and that Celeb is still having fun despite losing Rosie
Regulars may remember that our DS separated from DIL 2 months ago. So far we haven`t seen grandchildren in the flesh but they have Skyped most weekends when they are with him. They actually ask to do this which I think is amazing considering how little contact they have had with us - and it just goes to show that children do want to be in touch with their grandparents - irrespective of what their parents think!
Look after yourselves Ladies - I know how difficult the run up to Christmas is so be extra kind to yourselves
XX

Great hear from u eddiecat and thanks for pm

Rosie was huge part of our lives so we miss Her dreadfully will take time we just thank god for years we had her.

So pleased you skyping grandkids. I wonder what ours been told dread to think.

Do hope contact carries on and you get see them next,

Maddyone how s your daughter? Hope she recovering well.

Thanks for sharing that Eddiecat I hope you get to see your GC face to face soon xx

Thanks Celebgran xx

Yogagirlneither of us would have expected to be approaching our 5th anniversary of being cut out.

I'm so pleased that you are having contact with your GD's eddie and hopefully it wont be long before you see them in person and get to give them those hugs that you've waited for for so long.

Hope you and Mr. C, and doing OK Celeb. Your home will feel so empty without little Rosie. We're really missing our little dog now as it's been almost 4 weeks since we came away but at least we have him to go home too.

It's much cooler here at the moment and will be for a couple of days before it gets warmer again. We still have beautiful cloudless skies and it's lovely in the sunshine but a bit nippy in the shade. TBH it's a relief that the really high temperatures have taken a break for a while.

We're in our last week now, fly home next Thursday. I'm trying not to think about the mountain of paper work I'll have to get through on our return.

We collected Rosie ashes today sadly the member of staff who offered deliver didn't organise it. Never mind was best we did it th po I sat i car. I was so upset that we totally forgot mr c hair cut!
Luckily our dear hairdresser is friend and fitted him in tomorrow.
Busy day we have our dear nephews wife and little
Ones visit (half term) then my eye check.

Oh smilless it is empty here withOut her, but we have her ashes now sitting on marble table we had shipped from India in corner dining room.
Her spirit will live on in our hearts.

Do feel but low understandable.
We off see friends this evening,

Smileless yes is ?5 years for years you and you yogagirl
And nearly 9 for us but I a. Determined to live life to the full and as said to yogagirl so must you,

Sad day anyway butnwe chose Xmas card for xxxxxxx. Xxxxx and xxxx will photograph for xxxxxx blog and send no gifts this year Grandad is retiring and just one acknowledgment over 9 years sending vouchers, gift cards presents would have been polite.

for you Celeb my dear friend.

Well I am back, I chose half term especially, I get so upset bring at home remembering the half terms I had with mine.
The weather was awful and it was a mistake to go, everyone seemed to have someone, but less said about that the better. Smileless so pleased you had a great time, your grandchildren have certainly missed out, feel so much fir those of you who missed those special first years, at least I had that. I think there is no going back from what adult children have done, it is so cruel and they know it. Celebgran and Yogagirl, thoughts are with you also, like Smileless you gave been treated cruelly, but you all have people that want and need you, one day your gc will question why and seek you out, I am certain of that and it is so important to show them what lovely people you are and always have been. I know now for sure I can never be ok with my d. It is too late. I think one day my gd will come back to me, hopefully she remembers now, how much fun we had and how much I loved her.
Still feeling lots of pain, the tablets are not really helping, but I suppose time will sort it out. Eddie, so pleased you are in contact with your gc, it must be so lovely talking with them by Skype.

Luckylegs sorry your break away wasn't as good as you'd hoped, where did you go & did you go on your own? How old was your GD when you last saw her?

As you have said LL, it can never go back to how it was, the sadness never seems to get easier, I feel so depressed today for that reason. In the first year or two I didn't want to go on with this daily grieving for my AC&GC, it was so painful, but I always thought, If I didn't go on, then I wouldn't know the end of the story, i.e; if or when we would be reunited, but now, 5yrs on, there will be no happy ending, my beloved GC won't know who I am, doubt they will remember me So if we were reunited the strong & loving bond we once had would be gone, they would see me as a stranger, to get to know, or not How could I have a relationship with my D or S after all their cruelty towards me and their sister? We were kind, loving & very supportive of them both, and I financially. The many times my ND & I went to move my S when he was in Uni, in our little cars, crammed full with his stuff, we could only just about get in the cars ourselves after it was loaded then on for a lovely meal and laugh at what we had just accomplished

My ND & family are away for a long 'Halloween' weekend with their friends. I'm taking my neighbour out for lunch to say 'Thanks' for looking after Lilly [my little dog] whilst I was away in Crete. Lovely and sunny here, so we will head for the seafront

Aagh lucklegs sorry break wasn't nicer and dont stress next one will be better I hope!

If you feel low just remember other people seem have perfect lives but all have some sorrow it's just life.

Yes we missed all joynand magic of early years and nothing can change that. Am glad you had that.
Oh what kind neibor yogagirl enjoy your lunch,
Mr c just gone for his haircut I must make lunch,
We had e ail from car ins wanting proof of our no claims,as
Ways,something. Talk reckons they sorted wifi but never,rang,back as promised we shall see??.

Aagh niece and little one poorly so not seeing them today!
Never mind was able help dh cut roses down!
He hadmgo with hedge cutter yesterday and they looked awful better now!

Busy weekend coming up,we got dance tomorrow and meeting good friends for drinks Sunday.

Have good weekend all thanks for ?Smilless look forward to seeing you again maybe next year and sharing real hugs.

Lucklegs you also must make next link up and yogagirl too,
Hope you not down after holiday not being so good ?Have few treats this weekend! Sun out here today if all else fails ladies ?? for us all it is weekend

Glad you're back Luckylegs but sorry your week away didn't go as well as you'd hoped. Next time will be better I'm sure so don't be deterred. You were brave to venture out on your own, the first time was bound to be the hardest.

You're right of course, there's no going back now for us and our EC. Too much time has past and too much hurt has been caused.

I'm glad that you and Mr. C. are keeping busy Celeb, sounds as if your recovery is going well. It will be lovely to meet up again next year and would be great if more of us could get together.

Mr. S. and I are feeling rather flat after our hectic time with our God son and his brothers. It was wonderful but I guess for the first time we've realised just what we've missed out on and I don't need to tell any of you how heart breaking that is.

We're off to Universal Studios today, so Harry Potter here I come. That's bound to put a smile back on our faces.

Hello everyone, a big thank you to all of you who wished my daughter well and put flowers for her on here. She is apparently much better and at home again for the last few days. I have texted a couple of times and she has replied, so that's good, but that seems as far as it goes at the moment. I'm too afraid to push it any further, even though her grandmother is here and would love to see her and the children and new baby.
I've read all your posts; they made me feel so utterly sad, Smileless, Yogagirl, Luckylegs, and Celeb, you made my eyes fill with tears, your posts so full of sadness, all the lost love through so many years, your grandchildren growing up without knowing you, I can't really express how sad it all makes me feel.
Well it's the weekend and tomorrow our son and his partner, and our little grandson will be at their weekend house again so we will see them, it always makes me happy. We will have a little lunch and then off to a Halloween event for the littlies in the afternoon. We'll take mum in the wheelchair, she'll enjoy it. Our other son and his wife might come too. I thank God for those two wonderful sons, their partners, and our grandson, but there's a huge hole where our daughter and her family should be. But as Celeb said to me once, it could be so much worse, and she's right.

Morning Girls

It's sooo dark! I was up by 6am, dislike putting lights on, so used a torch I back onto a cul-de-sac and there is a big street light that shines into my bedroom, I've contacted the council, but nothing done, even though they said they would put a shield over my side if right sort of light to do it. Now the house on the corner, nearest to me have put a big light, illuminating their house, so more artificial lights, I would like to see the sun come up in the morning & the changing colour of the sky, but can't see that with all the artificial lights

Celebgran can you ask your hubby to come and deal with my ivy that grows all round my garden, I have to either get someone in at £250, or try myself, I did buy an extended hedge trimmer last year, but it was soo heavy my back went! I even chopped great chunks off the steams to get rid, but still growing like mad how it can still grow afterwards, I really don't know

Hope you enjoyed Harry Potter Smileless and have got your sparkle back after your God Son and family left your home all quiet again. xx

Thanks for updating us Maddy and good to hear your D&Baby are doing well, sounds like all will be well between you now, just keep doing what your doing.
Same as me Maddy I have a lovely D&GD, but that big sad hole is still there, where the others should be

My neighbour & I had a nice lunch by the sea yesterday at Old Leigh, it was a lovely sunny, warm day. After, I sorted out my front garden, re-did all the flower pots, only stopped when my garden bin was full & I was totally knackered [shocked]

Nice weekend all

Feeling sad on a day that should be full of happiness, my Son's Birthday today. I sent him an e-card, lovely one with balloons, trumpets, gift boxes & the 'happy birthday' song.
The e-cards are a good idea in situations like ours. Finding it hard to keep the tears at bay, been such a long time now, no reason for the estrangement, other than nasty s.i.l's evil works.

Hi Yogagirl, so sorry to hear today is a particularly difficult day for you. I wish I could say something to help you feel better, but there no words, I can only send virtual hugs and to you.

The e-card is a good idea, he will know you're thinking of him, and can never say you didn't care, the e-card is evidence that you did, and still do care.

Sorry yogagirl it's tough on birthdays,

As maddyone says at least he knows you still care,

Like usmchoosing Xmas cards for little Grandaughters and photographing them for xxxxxxx blog at least one day they will know we cared and never stopped caring despite being cut completely out of their lives,

At least you have email address yogagirl we don't have that or any phone contract,?

Yogagirl ivy a is horrendous it would pay you to get professional in to treat the roots

I helped mr c cutmroses back but didn't do back any good.?

Saw optician locally who has more i depth photography equipment but what a horrid man! My freckle is 1 in 10,000 chance turning cancerous yet he tried worry me into paying£30 for him to recheck it!
He was totally weird and didn't attempt to reassure me about new floater in right eye.
I will stick to normal optician.

Hi Everyone,
Strange thing happened today. First I decided to knock the strong painkillers on the head, I felt constantly groggy, it did help the pain but I didn't feel me. Went shopping with a friend this morning, whilst deliberating whether I really need a full length wool dress, I have a lot of clothes, my friend said have it as a present from DD, who wouldn't be getting me anything anyway. I bought it. On the way back home in the car, I just felt such anger at d cruelty, she knows what she is doing, she knows I adored her and grandchildren. I feel I have lost so much time with this living bereavement and it's taken its toll on my health. I am determined to get better and change lots of things. I needed to get mad. It's as if that door has closed, but a different one is opening if that makes sense. I can never feel the same as I used to, that means no going back and no hoping, just moving forward in a different direction.

Am glad lucklylegs for you move forward and don't look back! X

Hi Everyone- Back from our vacation in Vermont photographing the beautiful sunny fall days. Will read everyone’s posts and write back. Hope you are all well.