Support for Grans cut-out of AC&GC lives

To stop my post being twisted & blown out of proportion anymore than it already has been, below is the sentence, minus the two offending words;

If you were on a 'support page for victims and a perpetrator was welcomed onto the page, you would be horrified, you wouldn't post again and nor would any new poster come on to bare their soul and tell of their pain & sorrow!"

I never invited you onto this page Violet I said I wouldn't post anymore on the 'brainwashing' page you were on. It was Celebgran that welcomed you on here. Am I just like your m.i.l Violet always lying about you?

You are wrong. Because you are not a victim and we are not perpetrators.

'For some strange reason Celebgran is agreeing with the D.i.l's cutting out the husbands mother & the rest of his birth family'

You invited me here by saying that blatant lie and a few other pokies too. Of course I am going to defend myself and really, my DH who made that choice.

You're lying.
1) I haven't cut anyone out.
2)DH decided that her lying about Cancer was a step too far and stepped away.
3) I have never ever mentioned the rest of his family, where have you dreamed that from? but you're wrong, yet again and we saw his Uncle, Auntie and cousins the weekend.

Yes you do resemble her in some ways Yogagirl, my DH also said if his mother liked Yoga you could of been her.
The sheer lack of understanding of what is being said to you, how you manage to twist things, dream up situations, see things from just your POV, bully people, be passive aggressive, say things then deny saying them, causing this whole situation and then being shocked about it. You caused this by lying about me. If you hadn't of, i wouldn't be here.

'Grandmothers cut out of the lives of their AC&GC, to tell how when given the 'all clear' from her cancer scare, she expected a hug & kiss from her Son and a thank God! instead she found herself being cut out of his and her GC lives; the words came from my son's mouth, but I knew the act was from my d.i.l's mind'

Lie.
None of that even happened. You've made that up.

'As I've already said to Starlady don't for one minute believe all their praises of you Celebgran, there is only one reason they are doing that, and even if I'm wrong on that [which I know I'm not] Then it's because they have to hang on, like grim death, to any very rare estGM that would agree with them in cutting out their husbands mother. '

Another lie.

Yogagirl after all the support I have given you it's very hurtful that no you haven't apologised.

This is an open forum and everyone is free and welcome to post.

You seem incapable of actually reading and understanding the posts.

There are 2 sides to everything always.

Your rude comments about everyone must tell you something we can't all be wrong. It's really not like you. I am quite shocked as well as hurt.

I really don't need this and won't be posting until after Xmas I think bibbity was kind enough to point out I am at low point anyway.

Thanks as always lucklylegs and other posters including violetfloss and bibbity for kind support Much appreciated.

Off to see my little great niece and nephew now??

Oh Celeb I hope you have lovley time with your great neice and nephew.

Thank you for your kindness and understanding on a subject that is so difficult for everyone. I really hope you start feel better and you have a fantastic Christmas

Violet for the sake of your blood pressure, read what I wrote on another thread. That the only way to win with some folk is to not play the game.

Just reflecting, reading around, how often we all end up with the wrong "outlaw". There's many I'm sure I would appreciate, and they me. Ah well, c'est la vie.

I don't normal comment on here, but feel on this occasion I need to.

My mother is Yogagirl and on your discussion on several occasions it is been mentioned that she is bullying celeb gran, but it appears she is the one being bullied on this thread, with several posters including celeb gran stating she has mental health problems and needs to seek professional help.

Personally Violet you seem very patronising and manipulative, brown nosing celeb gran at every opportunity and anyone else thats given you attention.

This forum is for grandparents seeking support from estrangement not dil seeking advice about disowning their mil.

I am sorry about your father, but making an accusation that your mil has lied about something as serious as cancer, is a very big accusation to make towards another individual. Did she have a health concern where she believed she had cancer? Do you have hard proof of evidence that she was lying? You haven't been very clear in your previous posts.

My mother is an amazing mum and grandmother to my daughter and she does not have mental health problems, she had a cancer scare herself at one point due to the stress and bereavement of not seeing her other grandchildren.

As someone stated she has had some difficult anniversaries recently and with Christmas also approaching, this is a difficult time for her and the people that know her should have kept this in mind instead of attacking her. This forum is for supporting each other not a hateful debate thread.

I would not be on this thread Leo if your mother hadn't of dragged it from another thread. A thread that had absolutely nothing to do with Supporting Grandparents,more of a discussion about going no contact.

She continued to make up situations I have been in, lied through her teeth and was horrible to myself, and another 2-3 posters plus Celeb for being understanding about the situation I have been in.

She has lied about me continually through the last few pages. None of what she's said is true, which is why I'm defending myself.

Of course we have proof she lied about having Cancer. She didn't have a scare. We was told she had it, by her. Twice, 2 different times. Don't patronise me, DH didn't do this on a whim.

I think Celeb is great, end of. I think she's been through a shit time and is trying her best. I think the women on this thread, the ones I've spoke to anyway, are great. I won't take that back. Sorry

If your mom, hadn't of lied, I wouldn't be here defending myself.

celeb thankyou and no problem.

Celeb once again I am amazed by your recovery and really wish you well over Christmas.
Please for your own health be 'selfish' don't give more than you can to people who will only take.

1. I'm not fully buying that you're Yogas daughter. She USB delusional enough to make that profile herself to desperately cling to some 'support'

2. If (and that's a big if) you are the best it's clear why you two were the ones left behind. If you can read all of what she has posted and not see how vile she hasn't been then you are part of the problem.
Like mother like daughter.

Thank god your siblings were able to escape this toxicity and forge a happier healthier life.

Of course I am her daughter what a very strange thing to say, I have posted before and I have a different way of speaking to her?!?

You don't personally know us or my siblings, I doubt very much my sister is having a happier life, her relationship with her husband was always rocky, they almost split before their first wedding anniversary. They disowned the whole family also, not just us, one by one.

And how am I patronising violet, I just asked you to clarify. I think mum should come off here, what a horrible bitter group of people.

I must say that having read this thread for years Celeb has been the one poster who's story consistently sounds as though she was unjustifiably cut off and she seems like such a lovely person to boot. I have always felt sorry for her and hope that one day she can be reunited with her EC and GC... there's a reason we brown nose (she deserves it).
Yoga I've always read her posts and sympathised with her two estranged children and two grandchildren I've always thought she made it clear to her ED that she a) didn't approve of her traveller husband and b) that she had an enormous preference for her GD rather then GS. both things can over time lead to estrangement. She also doesn't seem to show much concern about her estrangement from her son and I feel that's very sad for him in particular. I've only written these things because of the vile accusations she's made of others and why on earth would she compare her situation to rape? I honestly feel that she does have MH problems and should seek help and I'm pleased that her daughter is on this thread, maybe she could read all posts again then gently encourage her mother to speak to a professional. Regardless of circumstances it must be extremely difficult to comprehend that you have two children that will likely never speak to you again, especially on special occasions like Christmas. I hope that yoga finds some solace in spending time with you Leo.

'You don't personally know us or my siblings, I doubt very much my sister is having a happier life, her relationship with her husband was always rocky, they almost split before their first wedding anniversary. They disowned the whole family also, not just us, one by one. '

Yoga doesn't personally know me either yet had made countless accusations about me thinking she knows my situation better than myself.

The reason this started is because of her, she can dish it out but not take it.
She has lied and lied about me. She has made things up her head and discussed them on here. Don't lie about people, it's as simple as that.

Yes you have been patronising and yes lying about having Cancer is a huge and vile accusation to make, not one of a sound mind. Telling your beloved son that you have Cancer which turns out to be a big fat, ugly lie, is the lowest. Especially when he's not long lost his FIL.
Your mom doesn't think it's that bad though and thinks it's unreasonable to step away from her and her behaviour.

That's why he 'cut her off' because of that, amgonst the other crap she did. Someone with that kind of mind frame isn't ok and shouldn't be allowed around Children.

If I hold my hands up I haven't read everything, just the last couple of pages, it's too much to read.

She probably doesn't mention my brother, as the discussion is about grandchildren but her and another family member have tried to contact him to no avail. Not even to news about my dad having a stroke.

As another poster put, she's probably too quick to react to comments and unfortunately with text it can be taken the wrong way. The trouble is unless you personally know someone, then you can misread what they have said and take it as an insult.

Violet yes I agree I don't personally know you and don't know what has happened with your mil for you to reach this point.

If she has lied then that is a very sick thing to say, especially with what happened to your own father. I'm guessing it was attention seeking and she might feel in competition with you. If your husband decides he wants a relationship in the future with her, then you don't have to visit with him.

Exactly Leokitty. I agree with everything you have just said.

On the other thread, I was giving my side of the situation, as to why sometimes people pull away from other people. It's still there now, the thread, it's lengthy but it's there.
That's all I did and here we are.

I was explaining that he hasn't done this for a laugh cause it's easy. It's hard, it's been difficult for him. He's been to counselling, we both have. She was abusive to him in in childhood and through to adulthood. She has been horrible to him, I've witnessed it. She then moved on to me, which is is when it all started.
I've explained all this.
There's no competition. I'm not playing a game, she was though it seems.

I'm not some petty girl little girl who doesn't like her MILs curtains or whatever and has took a dislike to her because of it. This is serious stuff. Emotional and Mental abuse not because I dislike her air freshener.

Leokitty I posted (about 3 pages back) trying to help your mum to look at what was happening on this thread and other GN threads . She has completely ignored that post (I think, as there has been no response!) Reading it might help you to see how such an unfortunate Reading has now arisen. My post directly to your mum is before mt more recent ones detailing some of my own worries! I understand why you are upset about the mental health comments but to be honest, son of your mum's comments and certainly her apparent complete ignoring of the facts as presented by posters has certainly created that impression! I hope that your mum is ok, and you as well.

Sorry about typos..."an unfortunate impression"; "to be honest, some ..." ;

The airfreshner part made me laugh. Well I'm sorry for what I said, I didn't know all of that and should of not jumped in before knowing all the facts. It sounds like a difficult decision to make and your husband decided this himself.

Thank you Leokitty

No Leo kitty you shouldn't jump in before reading evidence.

I have supported your mum for years and she posted very rude comments i.e. Pass the sick bucket and called me 2 faced. Not a pleasant think to read from someone supposed to be a friend.

To date have received no apology and if you are her daughter I would imagine you would know if that is her Normal behaviour regular posters on her expressed concern like myself.

It was me who mentioned her recent sad anniversaries and that she responds quickly.

I have had wonderful afternoon and didn't find your comments very nice to read on my return as I wasn't going to post. Again.

Ps thanks bugsby555 I really appreciate your kind comments I hope and pray my daughter will talk to me one day to