What would you do?

Fifi, maybe you're determined to go on that holiday, no matter what some posters have said. And if you do, I hope you have a good time. But please don't let that blind you to the problems at home.

IMO, you definitely should NOT worry about where he is going to live. If he has truly broken your trust, you owe him nothing.

Hey you guys! Thanks for your concern.

Coolgran65 I cant look at phone as he has changed his lock PIN.

Ginny42 I will not be second best to anyone. I have gone through divorce with small kiddies 20 odd years ago, I won't be second best to anyone. I actually feel sorry for him.. He may open up once he realises this is over, but its too late..I am becoming obsessive about tracking him. He sat in a road for 20 minutes on Friday - why?? I'm guessing phoning someone he didn't want me to know about, but its only a guess! I'm making things up in my head to what it could be! Not good.

This could have been going on months before I could track him on line. I just don't know!

There are so many similarities here to the situation I was in a few years ago: for example, change of PIN (my then husband also bought a second, PAYG phone for his cheating), texting late at night when I'd already gone to bed or was out of the room. We also had a holiday scheduled to take place a couple of weeks after I'd found out about the affair. Went on it. Disaster. He was still in touch with her. Now, nearly 3 years after I divorced him (he went off with yet another woman), my life is so peaceful. Once they lie, they carry on lying. You become obsessed and all you seem to be doing is checking up on them. Not worth it. You're worth so much more. Don't waste your time worrying about where he'll live, etc. His problem. You owe it to yourself to put yourself first. Let us know how it all goes. And don't be afraid of being on your own. I'm now in my early 60s and have had to start again, but it's possible.

Fifi.....Just thinking about your situation and hoping for the best
Good luck

Oh, Fiji, if it's gotten this bad, you either need to get him to go w/ you to Relate or you need to start thinking about leaving him. You deserve to be happy, and this isn't happiness.