Hithere…...You ask what GN thinks of the fruit post?
What do you think most people are going to say? Any fair minded person, given the scenario as you have explained it is going to be sympathetic towards the parents and gchild. How could they not?
Be they Gparents, foster parents, parents or just baby sitters!
More to the point is how representative of Gparents behaviour is this?
Individual experiences such as these are not 'normal' examples of Gparents behaviour.
I could give an account of a family who's mother and father were so engrossed in their mutual hatred that it blinded them to the effects it had on their children growing up in such an atmosphere.
The Grandparents on one side felt very strongly about this and tried to support the couple and the gchildren. They had perspective from the outside and could see just how damaging this behaviour was to the gc.
But were deliberately stopped from seeing the gchildren.
The reason given? The children were disruptive after they had visited them.
Of course they were disruptive, they were leaving behind a happier calmer environment to go back to the misery of living in a emotional pressure cooker!
But the couple, blind to anything other than their situation, let it be known that the GP's didn't follow their 'rules'. A half truth, a misrepresentation of the facts.
The other set of GP didn't live that close so didn't see the disfunction of the couple.
They were told negative things about their inlaws and colluded with the couple in thinking the inlaws were causing trouble in the family.
Soon, it was easier for the couple to go nc rather than face the shame that they were less invested in their own children than they were in playing mind games with each other.
What made it even easier was they couldn't accept that their own parents were more capable at that point in time, of being better carers of the gc. So for the couple to be comfortable in their self imposed lie, the gps had to go.
Forget the gps feelings, think of the desolation of the children.
No release valve anymore. No place to recover.
Denied the knowledge that the world is bigger than just mum and dad, and that love comes from all kinds of people.
Just because your a parent doesn't mean you always know what's best for your child, and just because your a gp who does things differently, doesn't mean you are hostile towards the ACs.
Maybe think outside the box of your personal frame work now and again?
Good Morning Thursday Maundy Thursday 28th March 2024