Baby’s name could break up my family

Lucca

Calendargirl

I am trying to think of the worst surname in history Dilly.

Tempted to suggest a few...
Shufflebottom?
Grocock?

Oh dear , I think Calendargirl was talking to Dillythegardener not suggesting “Dilly” was the worst surname .

I think you need to revisit your values Normskill. We are estranged from our youngest son and only GC and believe me, you don't want to risk a division in your family for any reason, never mind over a name chosen for a GC.

Please don’t make this an issue. You could find yourselves estranged in the future.

I think Gladys is a lovely name, two of the kindest women I have known were called Gladys, and had I had a daughter I might have chosen it.
I am not sure about 'family values', as people do view names differently. We had a post about 'Delilah' being a name that might upset some people, I can see why. Lolita and its variations were for a long time out of favour in English-speaking countries, but have returned.
There are some cultures where naming is important to other family members, as pointed out, fairly rare in much of the UK now.
It also sounds as if it is the baby's aunt / OP's daughter who might be the most upset, and we don't know her reasons.
Normskill - that may be where your tact and support is needed, if it something she had been banking on. Whatever her reasons for doing so, she (and any other family members) do need to accept the situation. I wish you luck.

gillybob

My little Evie was very nearly a Mabel MawB . She really suits her name but would have suited being Mabel too. I think it’s a cute name and reminds me of those lovely Mabel Lucy Atwell characters.

I can’t see how a name could tear up a family unless the baby is to be called Adolf or something hideous like that .

Anyway the names that we might’ve thought old fashioned, are all back in fashion now . I sincerely hope no poor little baby is ever saddled with my horrible name (popular in the 60’s) ?

Mea culpa.
Actually I really like the name Mabel, I think tgat like Matilda, it is very sweet and one of the nicer “old-fashioned” names that is becoming more popular. So I truly take that back
(They did also consider Arlo and Otto as boys names - both apparently popular these days.)
However, in mitigation their surname which also starts with “Ma ..” would not have gone well with it, almost rhyming, which now makes me think of those (genuine) souls afflicted with names such as Holly Berry, Hazel Nutt, Heather Glenn, any little boy with the surname Bates, or indeed Nicholas Hunt?

OP, if the naming of the baby can break your family up then its already on very shaky ground.

Maybe they really liked his name but didn't like your daughters. Just because they named one child one after one side, it doesn't mean that they owe a name to your side. This is children's names, not point scoring. Let the parents have fun naming their child and don't get involved in their marriage.

Any family which could break up because of a name for a baby is broken already.

Just reading back, one of my closest friends has the maiden name Grocock.
Her brother changed his by deed poll as soon as he was old enough.
She never appeared bothered but was happy to be married and change it.

My husband had a childhood friend called Jack Russell, oh boy did he get it in school lol

With a shortage of Florists flowers during the war, my mother was overwhelmed with bunches of garden daffodils from well wishers when I was born. In a weakened state she toyed with the idea of daffodil as a name, until it was tactfully suggested by my grandparents that she should delay a final decision until my father came home on leave from the army and she felt a bit stronger. They admirably resisted any temptation to try to impose their own suggestions. (Luckily for me my parents reverted to their original choice! )

I agree with all of the comments above! Totally up to the parents to choose their baby’s names. My Mum did visibly shudder when seeing a ‘possible’ name on our list for DD1. She’d had a step grandmother with that name who was apparently universally disliked. Luckily I went off it. We loved the name Flora but at a family party everyone was shocked and said you can’t name a child after a margarine ?. It's best to keep thoughts and opinions to yourself. I love all my GCs names and happily they include quite a few ‘family’ names which is a bonus

My SiL married a Grocock, I don't think I could have done that, but it doesn't seem to bother her, or her children and their wives!

My Mum had a school friend named Pearl Button . You don’t hear of many Pearls these days although I know a few Rubys and Emeralds .....

I'm amazed when names are passed down from father to son and mother to daughter for the next generation, for example take George snr and Barbara Bush, son and daughter George (W) and Barbara. How many people do you need in the a nuclear family with the same name? At least they displayed amazing imagination when they pulled "Jed" out of the hat for child number 3, or possibly not, that could have been a mere acronym!

'Pearl Button'! Marmight

Continuing on the theme of names within the family, I wonder whether Michael Jackson's two sisters, Janet in particularly, pondered "why I'm a called plain old Janet and she gets LaToya as a moniker"

Family names a minefield at the best of times!

I think it is a touch dramatic to say the baby's name could break up your family! I think that you need to grow up!!

The choice of names is down to the parents. Even if you don't like it, just say it is lovely. It will grow on you.

My grandchildren's middle names are after my dil family. It has never caused an issue with me.

Well, what in a name? It is nobodys business but the parents.
My niece named her daughter Tiger and it suits her. We have all got used to it. Tiggs for short.

‘It conflicts with my family values’. And what values would they be, It surely can’t be about a child’s name. Would you be happy if they included your daughters name but as a middle name. Your DiL will choose the name she wants for her baby and it’s got nothing whatsoever to do with you as you are only the grandmother with no rights and you would do well to remember that.

‘How do I respond to keep my values’ . You respect your DiL and don’t put pressure on your son and I hope that they has a lovely healthy baby. You seriously need to reconsider what your values are.

Baby's name is up to Parents. NOT extended family members. If they want to use a family name OK if they do not want to use a family name very OK.

I and my son’s MIL have the same name. My granddaughter has it as a middle name and everybody’s happy!

Awful surnames - how about Smellie? I used to know one. I’d have changed it myself.

To let this break up the family would be really pathetic. I cannot understand such thinking. A new baby is a joyful event whatever name it is given.
It's absolutely up to the parents to choose their babies names
and grandparents just have to accept it and smile.

I knew a Pudge. I'd never have allowed myself to live life as a Pudge.

Apologies to any Pudges

Normskilll
As long as it is a 'proper name' and not a 'nick-name', or silly shortening, what does it matter?

There are an awful lot of silly names out there, the initials need to be considered too. Signing cheques does not seem to matter these days. (not enough room if long name!)

Consider too, what the child will be called at school. Children can be so cruel.