A close friend and neighbour has a husband recently diagnosed with Altzheimers. I have tried to support her, but being recently bereaved myself, I am a very slender Reed to lean on!
The husband is starting to show violent tendencies, and my friend has arrived on my doorstep in tears more than once.
My problem is that she totally and confrontationally dismisses any suggestions I make, such as involving the GP or any other professionals “far too busy”, her own family, “they all work full time” and “I don’t want to upset them”, and telling me I have no idea what I’m talking about, accompanied by much snorting and eye rolling. Along with “you just don’t understand, do you?”.
Then she goes off, feeling much better, leaving me angry, upset and totally useless!
I have now decided to step back from the friendship, and try to make her involve some professional help. I feel if I’m not available to be ‘dumped on’ she just might involve her family and even her doctor!
I feel much better, but a bit guilty! I think I should concentrate on me and my well-being after my own bereavement (during which she avoided me “giving me space” as she put it!
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