I’m 58, my sister 57. I’ve managed a rental flat for my parents since a teenager. This year, my sister is finally helping by painting the walls. She’s been living with my parents for 3 years now while building a huge home next door to them. All was fine until 6 months ago.
My sister ran out of money to finish her home. Mom is 79, Dad 89. She expects them to help her financially. Meanwhile, my sister owns land (which she’ll never build on) and refuses to sell it. It is worth approximately 180,000. She could finish her home and have money left over.
As I also help my parents with paying bills on the internet (as they don’t know how to use it), I found out that my mom has paid in her credit card 15,000 towards my sisters debts. When I asked mom about it, she admitted that she did and also said that she gave my sister a further 7,000 in cash. My mom said that she told my sister that she doesn’t want to be paid back. That’s over 22,000!
Now, I don’t mind that my parents helped my sister out. And I’m sure my sister needs more money as her house is still not complete. Where I’m having a problem is that my parents are not adding this extra amount that my sister received on their will. They keep telling me not to be jealous of your sister. I’m not jealous. It’s about fairness. In 6 months, my sister received 22,000. How do I know that the amount will continue to rise and may reach 80,000. If my parents were to die today, and their estate to be divided among my sister and I equally, I would be getting 22,000 less than my sister. How is this fair?
As my sister lives with them (she has been divorced for 20 years, no children) she eats and lives at their home free of charge. She also gets free television. My sister is now in the process of convincing my parents to pay for her tv subscription at her new home! It never ends. I cannot take it anymore. She is taking advantage of my parents and won’t stop.
How does she get her own way? My mom has said that my sister has a temper tantrum and cries, pulling out her hair and yelling “I’m going to kill myself if I can’t pay”. My mom feeling sorry, pays her bills. Then, mom comes to me saying “I can’t give her more money. Why doesn’t she sell her land? Why is she putting us in this situation?”
I am really upset. I feel sorry for my parents but they keep giving in. I have spoken to my sister and she yells at me saying to mind my own business. I have told her that I will go after her for every penny once our parents are gone and it’s time for the will.
I no longer want to see my parents nor my sister. I schedule and go to every doctor appointment with my parents. My sister never goes. All of my life I have been the one my parents consult with, and I help out with everything. My sister never has time. She is a teacher as I am, and I ask her why is it that I have the extra time and you don’t! I am married with one son, and my husband has 4 children. Together, we put 3 kids through college.
I suffer from stomach problems and have had cancer. I cannot handle the stress anymore. I love my parents but cannot deal with my toxic sister anymore. She is selfish and money hungry. She is going to live next door to my parents. I even pick up my parents mail, as my sister has no time. How do I deal with all this?
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