My son brought me birthday presents. One of those is a large cushion from one of his ex-wives. He helped her to choose it for me in one of those quite expensive village gift shops.
When he presented it to me on my birthday I liked the cushion and expressed lots of appreciation for the kind and pretty gift. I almost never meet this ex daughter in law in person, although we like each other well enough.
Unfortunately, later on I could find no use for the cushion which is too large for my only chair . I don't have a sofa, as I live downstairs and inhabit a small area with no space for things I don't currently use. I wondered if I could return the cushion so she can get a refund but thought better not as ex daughter in law is very busy moving house and has a busy social life.
My son discovered the cushion in the cupboard and was insulted on his ex-wife's behalf and said I ought to have said immediately i did not like cushion, instead of "throwing it in a cupboard" and he told me the correct form of words for refusing a gift.
This conversation went on for about two hours during which he compared my behaviour unfavourably with two of his ex-wives. I felt sad he'd harangue me like this.. I asked him what he would like, and he said in future tell him immediately if I don't like a present, then he could change it or return it.. I was puzzled as I had last week said to him I did not have a use for a grass rake he bought for me, and he was offended by my not needing a grass rake and insisted I keep it.
And Xmas is coming on! I fear he'd be offended if I said in advance please to not buy me anything. I am difficult to buy anything for as I have enough clothing and household stuff, and my clothing size is a problem anyway.
What worries me and kept me awake last night is how I can be a good mother to my son when he takes offence like this.
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