Being bullied by close family - how did you put a stop to it?

Ramblingrose I also find that I am an easy target. I'm a very patient person and I will try to explain for far too long. Eventually I just stop speaking to that person at all. Then they are angry with me for that which is silly because, if explaining, apologising and attempting to make the situation better doesn't work, what realistically are you left with?

You can't become a carbon copy of other people or morph into whatever it is they think you should be... You are you.

You can't just bite your tongue and not tell people what bothers you but with some people that just gives them ammunition against you.

Relationships are compromise, 50/50, neither one more important.

Those are the relationships that work.

Saying you will not engage if you're being shouted at, and either walking away or ending a 'phone call is the best way forward Ramblingrose.

Hopefully she'll realise that she wont be listened too if she carries on in this way and adopt a calmer and mature approach. If not, at least you can avoid her verbal bullying.

My sister does this at times. I sometimes return the volley and she doesnt speak for two months. Creeps back. Never says sorry, as I do. Shes very much in our late fathers mould.
Generally, I say ,dont go there, you wont win, and she backs off. Am amazed Starblaze tried so much. Kudos to you. I had horrendous childhood. Never talk about it. I know my own worth.lol.. so I think it how we deal with stuff. I wouldn't give my late parents any control over me, from the age of four. The age I considered myself to be of independent thought. Although I didn't realise it at the time. As a mother myself, I did a lot of psychology courses before motherhood. I feel its finally working out for me. Watch this space.

My SIL. She almost ruined my grandsons Christening by getting her family and my mother to boycott it. But it was just another in a long line of events that she had to control.

That was the final straw for me. I have no contact with her or my brother's side of the family anymore. That was probably her aim anyway.

If you are physically or mentally weaker you will not stop a bully, it’s no different in the schoolyard, if you or someone else stands up to the bully and make them fear you, it will stop. If you are a partner who is being abused you either need to be protected or you should leave.
The bully must understand the consequences of hurting you, mentally or physically if needed

I got married to a man who could shut his mother-in-law up.

My sister did so too.

A big fat NO. Waste of time and effort. People don’t change, certainly not over a certain age.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sorry: where on earth did that come from?
How do I delete it?

GillT57 yep, love that comment. Hard when it’s my DIL ranting obscenities at me, her MIL. I’m beginning to think she’s a narcissist and very mentally unstable. I’m at my wits end sadly

I'm sorry to hear that Plertie.