A question of etiquette perhaps?

I wouldn't expect or want my Daughters to bring anything with them. I love to treat them

I love having my children and their families here for dinner. I don’t expect anything from them at all, although they always bring wine and flowers, and they’re much appreciated. It gives me pleasure to see them all tucking in to one of my dinners. It’s my treat to them. They all clear away etc., while I put my feet up which is lovely.

My sister lives in a big house with a big garden that is situated in the most convenient position for visiting rellies.
Why should she do all the work?
Last time we went we took puddings, others brought cheese and biscuits or nibbles so she did the main course.
Why wouldn’t we? We want her to enjoy it too.
The young bring nothing.( not my children) When I say young I’m talking 30’s with partners/wives/children. They are all working and earning good money. Even a bunch of flowers would be nice.

In our case the whole family coming for a meal would mean 12 adults and 9 children coming for a meal. That is a lot a of work for me and DH especially if it's a sit down dinner. I really appreciate the family bringing the desserts. They sometimes bring a range of salads if we do a BBQ. The single adult sons bring drinks.

We have seen all the families individually in gardens over the last few days. It will be some time before we can all get together again.

For my children, as someone else said, they are coming home..If they are coming with boyfriend/ gfriend, then yes, I would expect a small something ..bottle of wine, flowers etc. As for other guests other than parents or my children yes, I do expect something.

I think ‘etiquette” is an odd word to apply to family. Agree with others guests/friends totally different to AC visiting.

They bring my adorable grandchildren!!
And smiles.

I plan special dinners carefully, and definitely don’t want anyone to bring food! Wine, flowers , chocolates etc are always appreciated, but never expected. Children or not, they are all guests, and the same rules apply.

Pre Covid I would invite family members to lunch to meet each other, just happy to see them enjoying each others' company. We saw DD and family at least once a week, in her house or ours. I am more likely to be presented with some mending that needs doing!
One DS and DDiL would bring flowers when coming to stay. The other two families wouldn't bring anything, nor would I have expected it. Visiting friends totally different, would always take flowers and wine, and be surprised if tgey came to us empty handed. But family would be coming home, they are not guests!

Just wish they would come more often. The pleasure of their company is enough, and if they offer to help in any way with collecting plates, washing up etc that's very welcome too, but not compulsory.

I'm not so sure I view it as "etiquette", more as a grateful contribution when someone has gone to the trouble of cooking for us.

Wine, flowers, chocolates, a dessert or even an addition to the main meal (eg vegetables, roast potatoes). I would take one or more of the above, and my son would do the same when coming to us.

I think there is a huge difference between adult children coming home for a meal - whether it is Christmas Dinner or an informal supper - and going to a friend's house for a dinner party or similar. I don't really understand the thinking of those who seem to be seeing the two things as the same. Of course people should take a bottle or two of wine, or flowers/chocolates to a friend's house, but that's not the question being asked, is it?

If we have family parties (usually at my sister's house) for 'big birthdays' or similar, everyone brings something, but that is completely different as there is usually upwards of 30 people, and we comprise vegans, vegetarians, coeliacs and so on, and range from newborns to great grandparents, so if we all contribute something then everyone will get something they can eat and enjoy. That's not the same as an adult child and their partner coming for something to eat, though. Or not in my book, anyway.

If they’re coming for Sunday lunch (happy precondition days), they’d be coming home. Christmas dinner, or a big family get together, they’d ask what they can contribute.

The only time we asked son and dil to bring anything was last Christmas when my daughter and I had both been hospitalised with severe covid and we didn’t have the strength to do it all . We asked them to provide pudding . They brought 4 different deserts

As, when we ALL gather, our family is growing larger and larger, we think it is unfair to expect one person/household to do all the work and have all the expense so we have made it a bit of a family tradition to 'all bring something'. Doesn't matter what but it takes the burden off the hosts. Even the smaller children like to contribute (bringing a drawing, some (self) iced biscuits or a box of chocs to share) and teaches them to appreciate that these parties take time, work and effort.
Needless to say there are always certain family members who never offer and let others to the bulk of the entertaining but that isn't going to stop the rest of us.! WHEN we are allowed that is

My daughter always asks can she bring something and the answer is always, just yourselves. If they fancy something to drink that they know I wouldn't have , then they'd bring that. My son would just walk in and ask what's for dinner.? If it was a BBQ then he would be the cook. Everyone mucks in with the clearing up /washing up. I always take a bottle of wine or ask if I can bring a desert, if I m a guest

Often, in our family, we go to our Daughter and S i L, but always take some part of the meal, so it is shared enterprise.
It enhances our time together.

I usually get invited to theirs. Christmas dinner generally. I would take dessert

I always take something either a cake or wine, flowers, gifts for the kids. My girls always bring somethings I never expect or ask.
My freind always gets cross at me when I bring something but I still do.
I have had no visitors or been anywhere for a year but I will still do the same always.

I live in the US. When I first came to live here many years ago I thought it was strange that any guests invited to our home always insisted on bringing something to contribute to the meal. Wine (and often a hostess gift) would also be brought. Having been here long enough to get used to this idea, I think it is brilliant. Hosting any gathering is so much easier, especially as we are getting older!

Our children wouldn't bring anything and We have never expected it

My AC always bring something. It’s a token of appreciation. I never expect anything but it’s always warmly received.

I have never felt like a guest when I have been able to visit either of my daughters, currently unable to visit due to COVID, but would never dream of turning up empty handed and neither would they now that they are grown up.

I wouldn’t expect my children to bring anything as they’re coming ‘home’. But to be fair my DiL nearly always asks if we need anything bringing to which I normally say no thanks.

I do think you’re right to some degree it was a nice polite thing to do but seems to not happen now. I suppose we can encourage it to start again by doing it ourselves and getting the GC to do it?

Happy Easter ? to all