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divorce

(39 Posts)

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cher45 Sat 10-Jul-21 09:56:06

thanks I m just not strong enough to fight this feel its too late
Thankyou all

Redhead56 Fri 09-Jul-21 16:57:33

You do have a lot on your plate I am sorry you are having this terrible time. Take advice about Women’s Aid and CAB information is really important take notes if you feel it will help. You and your daughter can support each other it will give you strength. There will be light at the end of the tunnel be strong and take care ?

NotSpaghetti Fri 09-Jul-21 13:20:58

Be brave. Speak to Women's Aid, the CAB and a solicitor (they will normally give a free half hour).

It may seem scary but once over you are a free person again.

Good luck.
flowers

Chardy Fri 09-Jul-21 12:37:01

Love to you and your daughter

Hithere Fri 09-Jul-21 12:35:02

So sorry to hear that.
She still needs professional help.

cher45 Fri 09-Jul-21 12:33:10

no addiction wanted to kill her self been in hospital I took her we are getting some help thanks

Hithere Fri 09-Jul-21 12:25:05

So you have basically no relationship with your husband for 20 years but live in the same house?
If so, run to a lawyer and get a divorce. Take control of your life instead of letting things happen to you

Your daughter came back after a breakup- is she the one who overdosed?

Support your daughter get back on her feet.
If she is the one who overdosed, she needs professional help for her addiction and dont enable her.

BlueBelle Fri 09-Jul-21 12:08:10

Oh dear it’s hard to follow your story but you’ve had enough basically …..get out as soon as ….being alone is a dream compared to living with someone you no longer can stand or love or who treats you badly nothing to be afraid of being alone
Can you and your daughter look for somewhere together
See a solicitor and get their help, get some counselling, set the ball rolling without wasting another minute
Good luck and keep coming here for lots of support

Infinity2 Fri 09-Jul-21 11:47:26

My friend’s daughter was in the same situation as you are but finally made the break. That was four years ago. After all the difficulties and problems she faced in the first year, her life has completely changed. She is happy and recently met a very decent man who she is going to marry. Reach out and get as much help as you can. Contact Women’s Aid, Citizens Advice, the Samaritans - anyone and everyone you can think of that may be able to help.
However dark and desperate things may seem at the moment, life CAN be better for you. And you can make a new, different, but better life in later life. Sending you all good wishes and all future luck ?

Kestrel Fri 09-Jul-21 11:46:58

Maybe contact CAB and get some info about what to do next? They are outside of the situation and can give you some pointers about how to go forward.

cher45 Fri 09-Jul-21 11:31:28

sorry Yes daughter come back when the broke up I just dont know what to do

wildswan16 Fri 09-Jul-21 11:14:53

You have made the first step - that is always the hardest. The thought of all the changes to come will feel overwhelming - but it often works out easier than you expect.

Keep remembering how peaceful life will be when you are able to live in your own home. It may be smaller, or not as nice as where you are now - but your happiness will make up for that.

DiscoDancer1975 Fri 09-Jul-21 11:09:44

Cher, it all sounds horrible, but sorry, couldn’t follow some of it. Who took the overdose? Does your daughter live with you?
However, if you’re talking to lawyers, you’ve made the first brave step. You obviously need to be out of this relationship, as talking clearly doesn’t work, and it’s been 20 years.
Sorry, I can’t offer any more advice, except perhaps to look after your mental health. Do talk to your GP if you can.
I wish you all the very best?

cher45 Fri 09-Jul-21 10:44:43

We have had separate bedrooms for 20years we dont speak he
cant with out be nasty everything that happens is my fault doesnt eat with us works 7 days a week rest of time in room in bed eats in room pastys and crisps chocolate like a teenager I cut grass get workmen to do work on house has was bought with view to do up ?? I cant take anymore just lost job I had having timeoff to look after daughter just returned after gaslight relsoionship took over dose he said after laying in bed at 4am when all started no surprised living with you I have started taking to lawyers Its hard giving up on home scared of later life alone but cant face with him help!!!