In the past the kind people on this forum have offered me wonderful advice, so I am taking the liberty of trying again.
My elderly mother recently moved to live near me - I don't live in the UK any more. We thought this would just be for a short while (ha!) during Covid, but it has now become a permanent move. She is in a very nice retirement home where she has a great social life and is happy, although her personality is very negative and she goes on and on about what is wrong, never about what is good.
Both of my brothers and most of my family are still in the UK, so I now feel like the entire responsibility for her rests on my shoulders. While Covid is still rampant, they cannot come here and visit her.
I have never been close to my Mum, and for my whole life she has been extremely selfish / self-centered to a massive degree.
I am finding it incredibly difficult to adjust to being "on-call" for her all the time, feeling that I need to include her in all of our family get-togethers here etc. (I have one daughter here with her family and one son in the UK with his wife).
I am sure I sound horrible, but I just feel so resentful that my life is now so taken up with her needs.
I still work, have 3 grandkids who I want to spend time with, and a ton of other things to keep me busy.
I feel that my mother has no understanding of how she has turned my life upside down! While she was still in London she was much much less demanding of my brothers, and they keep telling me not to give her so much attention but that is easier said than done.
Not sure if anyone has any suggestions or even empathy for this situation? I don't think anything can be changed about the actual situation but I need to get my head in a better place.
I really hate feeling like a bitch, and I try to be loving towards her, but inside I am struggling and cannot share these feelings with anyone.
I am considering seeing a counselor as it's really getting me down.
Thanks in advance for any thoughts
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